There are plenty of mother-in-laws out there who are absolute delights, but others unfortunately give the title a bad rep.
Dubbed ‘monster-in-laws’, this subset of women are ‘meddlesome and purposefully live to aggravate’ their son or daughter’s romantic partner, according to Urban Dictionary.
When mum-of-two and TikToker Madison LeBlanc Barbosa asked her followers to share their experiences with their own mother-in-laws, she never predicted the flood of ‘horrendous’ responses that came in.
From struggling to respect boundaries to refusing to accept their child’s partner as part of the family, there was no shortage of women who had issues with their MIL.
In fact, so many people replied that Madison has now turned her initial video on the topic into a TikTok series titled Monster-In-Law, where she reads out all her followers stories.
‘Some of these women belong in jail – honest to God,’ Madison says — and after reading the tales, we’re inclined to agree. So before you read on, you may want to heed the creator’s warning: ‘Buckle up.’
Crossing boundaries
Boundaries are important in any relationship, from romantic partners to family and friends. Yes, they can irritate us from time to time, but if they’ve drawn a line in the sand about something, it’s never okay to cross it.
For many who shared their monster-in-law stories, setting any sort of boundary was taken as a personal attack, before being pushed or broken without any consideration.
One woman recalled: ‘My mother-in-law cut my daughter’s hair without telling me or asking, and it was her first haircut by the way.’
‘My mother-in-law had a mental breakdown and pitched a fit when we told her should couldn’t kiss our newborn baby on the lips,’ said another. ‘She told my husband that she couldn’t be a grandma to our baby if we didn’t allow it.’
Naming a child is an issue that can lead to friction from the grandparents, something one of Madison’s followers experienced firsthand.
‘My mother-in-law cried when I told her she couldn’t name my firstborn child,’ she said. ‘Once my baby was born and we told her the name, she started to call our baby a different name.’
Then there’s vaccinations. While the NHS guidance is that a child should be vaccinated to protect them against diseases, this is a choice that rests firmly with the parents.
This MIL didn’t seem to think so though, as one woman shared: ‘My husband’s aunt is a paediatrician. She convinced my mother-in-law to give my baby the flu vaccine.’
Decisions over a child’s religion are equally contentious.
‘My monster now ex-mother-in-law took my six-week-old and had her baptised in the Catholic Church without me,’ shared another of Madison’s followers. ‘We’re not Catholic.’
Not all boundaries were crossed with children though. For one woman, it was the relationship between her husband and his mother that proved a little too much.
‘She got into the shower with his to shave his back – yes, she wore nothing,’ she revealed.
Mother-in-laws and your relationship
Did you know that 67% have dated a person whose relationship with their mother negatively impacted the romantic relationship?
According to a study by Dating.com, it’s the sad truth. An additional 56% said their ex’s ‘overbearing’ mum was the main reason for their eventual breakup.
Just under half of the 5,000 active users who took part in the study said their partner’s mother tried to intervene in the couple’s business, with 62% claiming their ‘mama’s boy’ ex expected them to handle all household chores on their own.
To prevent this, dating expert Maria Sullivan said: ‘Be vocal if your boundaries are being crossed. If you keep your concerns to yourself, this will create bigger issues down the line that might not be as easy to control. ‘
However it’s also important to try and nurture a relationship with your in-laws, even if it’s tricky.
‘While it can be overwhelming and stressful, it’s still important to create some sort of bond with a potential in-law’ Maria added. ‘Compromise with your partner on an arrangement that works for both of you. This might mean your partner is seeing their mum or parents without you, sometimes or most of the time.’
Madison couldn’t quite believe this admission, saying: ‘My brain is still just trying to wrap my head around this. I have so many questions but also “I don’t want to f**king know”.
‘This one makes me want to physically vomit, and that’s putting it nicely. Any woman getting in the shower with her grown son… No.’
The cold shoulder
Some of the stories Madison shared of her followers’ nightmare mother-in-laws seemed to be a matter of nothing more than spite.
‘When we got married we did family wedding photos,’ read one. ‘My mother-in-law said “no, no, no, not you – just family”.’
Another woman claimed she was lambasted by her MIL as ‘selfish’ for breastfeeding her baby, while a third wrote in: ‘She told me her son’s ex would still be invited to all holidays because they’re still close.’
‘The way I would not show up,’ said Madison in response.
Then there was the mother-in-law who clearly had no appreciation for the woman who just birthed her grandchild.
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‘The day after giving birth, she came to meet the baby, and the whole time talked about how great her son did and how labour is so much harder for the father than the mother,’ the anonymous daughter-in-law shared.
Lastly, in an honourable mention, there’s no category to put this admission into apart from completely unhinged.
One woman confessed: ‘She gives me food I’m severely allergic to on purpose and then acts like it’s an accident.’
We sincerely hope she’s mistaken.
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Get in touch by emailing MetroLifestyleTeam@Metro.co.uk.
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