Sailors, firemen and cops, oh my! It’s prime time for NYC women looking to date a man in uniform
There’s just something about a man in uniform.
Single women in New York City are marching to dating events featuring first responders as they ditch dating apps and search for a specific type of man to be their co-captain.
“It’s a different caliber of guy that you’re meeting at these events,” Amber Soletti, founder of Single and the City, told The Post of dating events she hosts like the Fleet Week Bash, where service members drink free for the first hour, and Rescue Me, which welcomes ladies to flirt exclusively with men who are firefighters, paramedics, EMTs or police.
The guaranteed guest list is what’s attracted Melissa Lopez, 36.
“Women are always drawn to men in uniform,” Queens resident Lopez told The Post.
“You know they have a good job,” she said. “And it just says something about their character. They would run into a burning building, literally, where people are running in the opposite direction. They’re brave, strong, courageous and would put somebody else first.”
The respect that women have for first responders is why single FDNY Lt. Chris “Foxy” Fox, 39, frequents the Rescue Me events.
“It’s a bit refreshing, I would say, to have someone already kind of be on that wavelength when you get to talk to them,” Fox told The Post, noting that walking into a room of women you know are single and ready to mingle also gives him “a little extra confidence.”
The fact that he’s been voted the hottest firefighter at the event on several occasions also helps.
“It feels good, you know, and I’m not going to lie and say it doesn’t,” he admitted.
Men in uniform are some of the most desired, according to Soletti, who has hosted themed singles mixers in the city for 15 years.
And no, it’s not just fantasy. She agreed that uniformed men are typically social, domesticated, clean, well-mannered and athletic — and have a confirmed steady job.
“You’re not getting the painfully shy or really awkward or creepy guys,” Soletti said. “For the most part — I mean, there’s always an exception — but for the most part, they’re fun guys that know how to socialize and know how to have a good time.”
“It’s a really different experience for women.”
“There’s just something very attractive about a good-looking man in the uniform,” Nicole Lewis, 47, of New Jersey, told The Post. “These guys see people at their absolute worst and save the day. There is something kind of appealing about that.”
And “just in terms of the eye candy,” she added, “they were all very, very nice to look at.”
Online burnout leads to real-life flame
Matchmaking events have been on fire recently as more singles have been sounding the alarm about dating apps, calling them tiresome and complaining of burnout. Soletti confirmed the uptick, noting that Single and the City events have seen attendance jump 67% compared to last year.
People are “just really embracing it and wanting to get out and socialize,” Soletti noted.
But the Fleet Week and Rescue Me events aren’t just any old speed-dating or matchmaking event — they’re parties filled with honorable servicemen who attendees are encouraged to hit on.
And a little bit of encouragement was all that Lisa Torrens, 57, needed.
The Manhattan singleton told The Post she’s been a bit anti-social in recent years, but was pushed by her patriotism to buy a ticket to the Fleet Week event coming up Friday at the Dean to kick off her “hot girl summer.”
“They’re here for a little bit of time and they’re providing a service to the US, so you want to make sure they’re having a good time in New York City,” she said.
However, whether you’re leaving the bar with the love of your life or the love of your night likely depends on which event you attend.
Those hoping for a deeper connection might find one with a member of the FDNY or NYPD at the Rescue Me event — returning to the Dean on June 20 — which is intended to lead to longer-lasting connections.
At Rescue Me mixers, singles are given icebreaker cards with first responder trivia questions to encourage them to engage in conversation with the hero heartthrobs. Women stick red dots on the ones they consider the hottest — and from whom they want to receive some mouth-to-mouth.
Eligible bachelor Fox said he’s had both one-night stands and long-term relationships after meeting someone at Rescue Me, but Soletti said Fleet Week connections typically have expiration dates.
“With the Fleet Week event, you know, there’s no questions that need to be asked, because it’s very clear these guys and women are here for a week. That’s it,” she said.
“I don’t know of any long-term relationships, but I definitely know a lot of hookups that have come from it.”
Fleeting love
Torrens last attended the Fleet Week party in 2018 and ended up staying out until 3 a.m. at a diner with some young military men she met that night — and never saw again.
The fun fleeting flings of Fleet Week are what makes the event so popular.
Aliza Smith of Brooklyn said it was fun to walk around with a man in uniform after she met a Florida sailor during a party one year. They went on a few dates and it was fun to get “special treatment,” like getting swiped into the subway for free.
“I feel special because I was with someone who was respected by my fellow New Yorkers,” the 32-year-old said — even though their relationship didn’t last long. “It was more about showing him New York. We kissed. We had a great time, but it was more about having a good time.”
This year, she plans to just have fun.
“The weather is nice, and the city is full of sailors,” she said. “You just feel alive.”
