Many of us are feeling pretty mentally and emotionally stretched right now, with not much in reserve to manage anything that takes us by surprise. We have had many years now of increased social, political, financial and environmental uncertainty – that is a lot to deal with.
In the run-up to the festive season, a lot of us are feeling extremely tired and we can tend to see Christmas as a goalpost to just keep running slowly towards. It is exactly this time of year when we are at risk of being submerged and inundated with tasks, jobs and work – and, ironically, it is usually when we are at our lowest levels of motivation and energy reserve.
When we are going through such a period of flux and challenges, there are a few things we need to do to keep our feet on the ground and to rebuild our energy stocks.
Support
We need to recognise that we cannot do everything for everyone. We all need support. In fact, asking for help means our relationships grown stronger and become more authentic. Work out what kind of support you need right now. Is it practical advice and knowledge, is it another perspective and reflection, or is it emotional with a hug or a chat? When we are under pressure it is easy to feel we are alone – but we don’t have to be.
Conserve your energy
One life skill that is so important to master is knowing how and when to spend, and how and when to conserve, our energy. This includes physical, mental and emotional energy. What issue absolutely need your attention right now? Which issues can wait for a while, which can be delegated to someone else, and which are not yours to be involved in? Every day we wake up we only have a certain level of energy we can output before we need recharging. Stick to your limits and recognise that each day will hold different levels of starting energy for you, and that’s ok.
Constancy, habits and routine
Habits are our friends when they work in favour of our wellbeing, and the opposite when they don’t. Which habits are you carrying out in an automated robotic way, and which drain you? Why are you still doing them? Often, we have a “secondary gain” from them, or it is fear or lack of self-awareness that is driving them. Choose differently and change things up. A sense of routine and constancy can help us feel grounded and safe at a time when things are topsy turvy – what are you touchstones in your week and how can you maintain them?
Kindness and compassion
Frustration, fear, anxiety and tiredness can lead to our behaviours changing towards others. At a time when we need even more kindness and compassion in our lives, it can feel like the opposite is happening in the world around us. Firstly, you can be kinder to yourself – stop blaming yourself, give up self-criticism and start looking after yourself more. Next, when you go out into the world, think about others – what can you do and how can you help? Being kind to others actually benefits our own health and wellbeing too. A few acts of kindness can make all the difference.
Action
There are some things that we cannot do anything about, but there are others that we can. Identify what can be improved or acted upon – avoid denial. Anxiety and stress are reduced when we problem-solve and actually do something. Take small steps towards your goals and see how you feel.
Even though we can’t change the world overnight, we can decide to work on some things that will help us feel better prepared to deal with its challenges.
It is these five elements that can help feel hopeful about the future once more.
