Grey’s Anatomy Poll: Whose Side Are You On in the Calzona Custody Battle?
Over and over again in this week’s Grey’s Anatomy, Callie insisted to Arizona that she wasn’t moving their daughter to New York but merely discussing options. Unfortunately, it didn’t sound like that to Robbins — especially after an East Coast school called about Sofia’s application — so she lawyered the hell up. “You started this,” Arizona said. And now it’s up to us to finish it.
Working for Torres is the fact that she apologized for jumping the gun, acknowledging that she’d let her excitement over the potential for a Big Apple adventure with girlfriend Penny give her ex-wife the false impression that decisions had already been made. Working against Callie is the fact that she never once, for even a second, allowed for the possibility that Sofia would remain in Seattle with her other mom. So perhaps Arizona’s impression that decisions had already been made wasn’t false at all.
What do you think? Was Robbins a little too quick to hire an attorney? Or did Torres bring this custody battle on herself by acting like a single parent rather than a single co-parent? Vote in the poll below, then back up that vote with a measured argument in the comments section.
It´s so ridiculous how these people are suppose to own the hospital yet they keep leaving or trying to leave. THEY OWN THE HOSPITAL.
You can own a hospital and not work there. The fact that they own it AND work there was a plus for the medical staff, but hardly a necessary thing for the hospital.
This and I would think working at the hospital you own would bring up some possible conflict of interests issues as well.
Arizona is a likable character which you can’t just hate even after all the things she has done so let’s round up the list of things Arizona has done to Callie:
-Left her to go to Africa
-Blamed her for amputating her leg despite the fact that it saved her life.
-Refused to carry their child because of her job aspirations (This one is understandable but the fact that she had her doubts and strung the decision along until almost the end made it terrible)
-Cheated on her
I think we can all agree that Callie has put up with a lot of things while trying to save her relationship/marriage so I’m gonna join #TeamCallie.
Oh please…..life is a tit for tat? It’s ok for her to taker THEIR daughter across the country without discussing it because AZ cheated after going through a traumatic event? Yeah NO I don’t think so but if we want to compare Ho bout Callie always making AZ a third wheel in their relationship? Or sleeping with Sloan before the plane had barely lifted off?! Or her never listening or having accountability? Or her guilt tripping AZ only what 5 months after she lost her leg?! Come on Callie has been selfish and self absorbed the entire relationship! Damn she didn’t even show as much concern for her WIFE during the plane crash fiasco as she did her friend! Get real your assessment is way off! Way
I agree
Agree and also Arizona did try to have their child once and miscarried. It was in one of those flashback type episodes.
Lmao this is some made up ish right here. Callie was grieving for her dead best friend and father of her child at the same time that Arizona was dealing with her amputation. Callie was hella patient with her wife at that time (she was pushing her like any spouse *should* push their SO to work towards getting better/getting their life back), even though Arizona treated her like crap for the next year and then topped it off by cheating on her. If I was suddenly disabled and wanted to spend all day in bed, I would pray to the heavens that my spouse would use every trick they could pull together to make me fight to get my life back. And Callie did that. And Arizona still treated her like crap AND continued to blame her for that disability even though the alternative was death (and never seeing this child she “loves” so much ever again).
Also Arizona had been gone for weeks after yelling at Callie, humiliating her, and dumping her in public when Callie tried to get over her depression by sleeping with Mark, so don’t even try.
I swear, the blind Arizona love from her stans reaches ridiculous levels.
Again please Don’t you even try the Callie stans are beyond pathetic your entire comment NEVER HAPENED! You and your defending of Callie’s bad behavior is worse than her behavior! No absolutely not was it ok for her to selfishly pressure AZ after losing her leg because she wasn’t pressuring for motivation now was she? Nah she was pressuring because SHE wanted SEX! Get real Callie has never been for anyone but Callie! Oh she “yelled and humiliated her in public” lmao ummm you wanna talk about being a supportive partner? Who bout Callie whining complaining and generally being passive aggressive to the point it was taking AZ joy about something really important to her? Yeah that’s what I thought! It’s ok for Callie to screw her friend because she was depressed? Please it was wrong no matter how you try and justify it, it was typical Callie thinking only of herself and AZ must not have been that important if she could go jump her douche friend so soon after their breakup! You need a reality check Callie is only about Callie like last epi ” you don’t get to decide I’m going and I’m not leaving Sofia behind” like its all about her! AZ SAVED SOFIAS LIFE SHE HAS BEEN THERE SINCE MINUTE ONE! But It’s ok for Callie to make unilateral decisions? NOPE
Thank you! So tired of the Callie hate. #Team Callie
I actually like Callie AND Arizona but this shouldn’t be about them. The question for both of them should be what is best for Sofia. Callie is being selfish and only thinking about what she wants, not what Sofia needs therefore I have to side with Arizona.
Really hoping Callie will snap out of her penny-haze and realize she needs to put her daughter first, not her sex life.
Arizona actually tried to carry a child but had a miscarriage.
How about a both option? Both have done right and wrong. Choosing a side is like saying 1 is a better parent than the other. And neither is incompetent.
That’s wasn’t the question, though. It’s not about who’s incompetent because no one is saying either one of them is. It’s about whether Callie has the right to just assume she can take Sofia almost 3000 miles away from Arizona as if Arizona doesn’t have any rights to say where their daughter will live. With a hetero divorced couple, one parent cannot legally move their child to another state without the consent of the other co-parent. Does Callie believe she has more rights as Sophia’s biological mother than Arizona has as the adoptive parent? And in Washington State, is the law of her side or Arizona’s?
The only problem I have is that in a hetero example, Arizona is the equivalent of a step parent. Usually, unless there is a real danger to Sophia’s life, the courts will side with the biological parent. So, outside of the drama the show is trying to create, at best they would be forced to mediate a custody arrangement.
Didn’t Arizona adopt Sofia to ensure that in case anything happens to Callie she and Sofia would not be separated? I thought they did that years ago.
Arizona adopted Sofia when she was just a baby so she has parental roghts as well as Callie
Great! Then Callie can’t leave the state with Sofia without Arizona’s consenter she’s breaking the law. I have a strong feeling Arizona will say no way and Penny gives up her fellowship to stay with Callie in Seattle, paving the way for Edwards to get the fellowship, giving Jerrika Hinton her exit from the show.
Arizona is not a stepparent. Her words were “I want a piece of paper saying Sofia is mine” and Callie agreed. She is a legal parent with options. Im with Arizona.
I”m glad you remembered that. I’d forgotten and I’ve been asking what Arizona’s legal rights were since last week’s episode. Callie’s got a problem then. I’m not sure why she thinks she can just up and move if there’s a legal document saying Arizona’s Sofia’s mother too. Here’s to hoping Bailey’s comment about giving up her career for someone new sticks.
I’ve never been an Arizona fan, hated her from the beginning,but with this I agree with her Callow never consider any one in decision to just up and move across the country not even her child’s mother which is wrong on all acounts.
Callie had always been one of my favorites but she is wrong wrong wrong in this case. Arizona did exactly what she needed to do. PS….I can’t stand Penny!
I want to stay neutral to c who wins
Callie is the biological mom. Arizona is the step mom… When parents divorce step parents usually do not have contact with the children. Callie has ever right to move away with her and Marks daughter.
The question will be if they formed any legal agreements in regards to Sophia. Did Arizona legally adopt her after Mark’s passing? I presume we’ll get answers in the next handful of episodes.
I just keep remembering how pissed off Arizona was when Callie got pregnant with Sofia. Sorry, rooting for the one who ALWAYS wanted her, not the one who came to the party late.
This is my question, I don’t honestly remember. But if Arizona never did, she has nothing. But I also believe that Shonda probably is going to gloss over this fact, so it may be moot.
I think far too many times people get caught up in the legality, mine, yours, ours and what gets lost in all of it is what’s best for the child. Is it a good idea to move a child so young away from everything and everyone they know for a relationship that’s in its infancy? For someone who’s position is only for a year then who knows where the next move is? Is it fair to a child to take them away from the only other parent they’ve ever known, a parent she loves and sees regularly? This isn’t a legal issue in my eyes it’s about the best interest of the child. From where I sit AZ is the only one thinking of this while Callie is (in the words of Bailey) chasing tail across country with little or no concern as to what the impact will be on Sofia…chalking it up as life. If it is just life then she should make the sacrifice and stay in Seattle for the sake of her child until a better agreement/arrangement can be made.
This is just wrong. There’s no definite distinction between the biological and adoptive parents under the law, no matter if they are a straight or gay couple.
And if the law is not enough, remember that Mark told Arizona she was also Sophia’s mother, as much as he is her father.
But did Arizona ever actually adopt her? We will find out next Thursday.
Exactly I am wondering if she did adopt her because even though she took care of Sophia for ?4 years? And her and callie were broken up for part of that time too. She wouldn’t have the legal right of a parent unless she adopted her.
Yeah, no. That’s not how this parenting thing works. Two lesbians marry and have a child. (Yeah, I know the order was reversed in Calzona’s case. Doesn’t matter.) They ARE that child’s parents. Not a “step-parent.”
Um, you’re very wrong. Mark was Sophia’s father. You can not have two moms and a dad on a birth certificate. Arizona is only Sophia’s mom IF she adopted her. If she did not adopt Sophia then she is only Sophia’s step parent.
Only children born during a marriage or in the 9 months directly after a divorce are “of the marriage.” Unless Arizona adopted Sofia, she has no legal rights.
I’m pretty sure deep down, this is the attitude that Callie has. She clearly had to stop herself last night from implying so (though I am sure when arrangements were made between she, Arizona and Mark, they agreed they were all equally Sophia’s patents). If this is the case, it says a lot about how Callie feels in terms to how important she thinks Arizona is Sophia. It also confirms all the fears Arizona had about being with Callie from the very beginning. I also get the feeling that if this were Mark in Arizona’s place, this wouldn’t even be an issue and Callie would have shown him the proper respect
exactly, mark and callie are the parents and arizona was the step parent. She has no rights
Erm. I haven’t watched in years but I’m pretty sure Arizona adopted Sofia? That makes her just as much a parent as Callie does.
I do not remember Arizona ever adopting Sophia.. So that would make her just a step parent. If it comes out that Arizona adopted her then Callie is very much in the wrong
There was an episode where I think Stark (maybe someone else) made reference to Arizona not legally being a parent that ended with her telling Callie they needed to get the piece of paper that made her official. We didn’t actually see them do that, but Callie said okay and I believe we are to assume from that and the way they consistently refer to Arizona as Sofia’s mom and NOT her step-mom that that step happened. Arizona is not a step parent.
Unless they never went through with the paperwork… Which would make her the step mom.. Guess we will find out Thursday.
Ummmm, when you raise a child since birth you are not a step-parent, Arizona has been there since the beginning raising Sophia, blood isn’t the only thing that make you a parent
True BUT a legally is she a step parent (unless she adopted Sophia). A court will favor Callie because she is the biological mom.
Arizona adopted Sofia when she was a baby and when Mark was alive
That is impossible and they mentioned on the show later on that April would like some sort of legal form stating she was the mom… But it never went farther than it that.
Washington is one of a handful of states that allows for three legal parents. Arizona asked for “a piece of paper” making her Sofia’s mother and they have shared custody now so it seems like they went through with it. If she didn’t legally adopt her, she could be considered a de facto parent based on her relationship as Sofia’s coparent for her entire life. This might not get her primary custody but it might at least allow her to put up a fight. Either way, it doesn’t change the fact that Callie is thoughtlessly pulling her daughter away from what Sofia considers an equal mother, her home, her friends, her school, and her whole life to follow her girlfriend across the country on “an adventure” without considering how hard this change will be for Sofia. Callie needs a rude awakening.
Arizona adopted Sofia when she was a baby
She talked about adopting her, that was all.
Actually they had an episode where Arizona talked to Callie about getting parental rights written down on paper, so she isn’t a step parent, she’s Sophia’s adopted mother….I think it was the episode when zola came to the hospital while Mer & Derek were waiting to find out if the adoption went through.
Arizona’s side – Sophia is just as much her child as Callie’s. Callie is selfish by uprooting everyone’s life so she can follow her girlfriend she hasn’t known very long.
She is Arizonas child only if Arizona legally adopted Sophia. If she did not adopt her then she has no rights.
Excuse me, but even if she didn’t legally adopt her, she has raised Sofia here entire life and it morally wrong to insinuate that Sofia is not her mom, sophia was raised by 3 parents until Mark died. She has two moms and its incredibly cruel to say that just because you didn’t adopt a child, they are not yours. Arizona is apart of Sofia’s life and Callie knows that if Mark were alive he would be on Arizona’s side
Excuse me, but even if she didn’t legally adopt her, she has raised Sofia here entire life and it morally wrong to insinuate that Arizona is not her mom, sofia was raised by 3 parents until Mark died. She has two moms and its incredibly cruel to say that just because you didn’t adopt a child, they are not yours. Arizona is apart of Sofia’s life and Callie knows that if Mark were alive he would be on Arizona’s side
I agree, but a court will not see it that way. If there are no legal papers tying her to Sophia then she was just the step-parent.
Callie’s idea of a discussion is them talking niceties until Arizona figures out how she’ll handle Sophia being in New York. It’s been made very clear in the last two episodes that Callie leaving Sophia behind isn’t an option for her.
.
I get wanting to be with someone you care about, but they said I Love You only one episode ago. Callie should commute with the long distance relationship and take a couple extended vacations, not quit her job and uproot her daughter at this point.
This whole thing is so out of character for Callie. She’s really going to leave her career and friends for Penny??
It’s just filler to cause drama with Arizona.
Very lazy writing.
I disagree about it being out of character for Callie. I mean, she married George after what, 2-3 months of dating? And she was “willing” to leave her career behind to follow Arizona to Africa (she wasn’t really willing willing, but forced herself into acting like she was willing)- Callie is the kind of character who prioritizes love and relationships. There are plenty of real world people like that too, and sometimes it works out for them and is a great decision, and sometimes it backfires.
That said, it’s lazy writing because I’m pretty sure Sara Ramirez has another year on her contract with the show so I highly doubt Callie is going anywhere!
I agree this isn’t OOC for Callie but it is reverting back to early, immature Callie and not the cardio badass that she has become. Also, I’m pretty sure Sara’s contract is up at the end of this year so maybe this plot is insurance in case things don’t work out?
Edit: ortho badass
Completely agree. I swear, the writers spend so much time trying to make us like Arizona despite the ridiculous crap she pulls that they had Callie to do something wildly out of character so they could once again prop up Arizona’s weak character. Ugh.
I hate Penny! Just let her go alone!!
You realize that Callie will decide to stay and Penny will give up the fellowship to be with Calley. Then we’ll all be stuck with Penny!
I’ve been on Callie’s side all these years after the cheating. But, Arizona got my vote because Callie is thinking with her V-jay and not her brains and heart. Yet, hopefully this will get Calzona together after they get to their deep bottom.
Geez, yet another TV couple that can’t stay together? What is it with TV.
um, they havent been together for seasons now.
This is going to be an interesting story line to watch to see how the writers proceed. Arizona has been Sophie’s mother since Callie was 4 months pregnant but what are her legal ties since I don’t even know how legal their marriage was at the time, let alone whether or not Arizona ever actually adopted Sophia when Mark passed. I’d like to believe Callie wouldn’t use all that against Arizona but at a legal stand point, Callie may have all the rights on her side as she is in fact Callie’s birth and legal parent. This could get really ugly.
That all being said, I love that the two of them are back having screen time together. You can still feel the chemistry between Sarah and Jessica and I’ve missed that over the past years since their characters separated.
Agreed. This fight will be way different if Arizona adopted Sophia.
The law also says in many states that there can only be one legal mom. So if Arizona adopted her 4 years ago she would have taken the place of Callie in terms of legal rights not Mark.
Washington allows for a child to have more than two parents, so in this case it is entirely possible Arizona legally adopted Sofia without Mark or Callie relinquishing their legal rights.
If I’m not mistaken Sofia name is . Sofia Robbins Sloan Torres. She is as much Arizona’s daughter as she is Callies
I think Arizona made the correct call to get a lawyer. Callie jumped the gun and assumed a lot even though she has realized her mistake and apologized. It seems like she thinks she can do whatever she wants as long as she keeps Arizona in the loop. It will all come down to if Arizona ever legally adopted Sophia. At a dinner party at Teddy’s and Henry’s Arizona told Callie she wanted a piece of paper that officially made Sophia her child and Callie agreed. Remains to be seen if they actually went through with it. #TeamSophia.
* Sofia. Make that Sofia Robbin Sloan Torres.
legally that is callie’s and mark’s child….did arizona legally adopt her…because if she didn’t then she has nothing to say in the situation but if she did then she can fight…she wasn’t to thrilled when callied got pregnant in the first place and now she wants to play the victim….after she cheated on callie in the first place….
Oh she “wasn’t to thrilled when callie got pregnant” hmmmm I wonder why! Idiot truly first AZ is as much of a parent as those two (forgetting there would be NO Sofia here today without AZ) second Callie waited but a hot second to sleep with that douche and you wonder why AZ wasn’t happy? I dunno try coming back to the love of your life preggo and you weren’t even gone that long! Give me a break you are ridiculous
Callie been dating that woman how long?? It makes no sense to move to a new city with a woman your still getting to know
Why can’t I vote for “none” or “Sofia”? Can’t decide whose “team” I am, because both have their points, but they also both overreacted much.
I have a feeling if somebody’s comedy pilot gets picked up, Penny will be staying out and miraculously Stephanie and Kyle will be moving to New York together…
Neither because this storyline is just idiotic. Seems like it was created at the last second to fill in for another arc that couldn’t be done. Callie is overreacting by thinking she needs to move to New York because she is unwilling to travel there during free time, but she’s willing to make her daughter do just that to see her other mom. Arizona is overreacting by thinking 1 year in New York means Callie is never coming back.
You’re right that Callie is overreacting. I disagree about Arizona. Callie was about to spew some nonsense last night and smartly bit her tongue. Arizona knows exactly what’s going on here and what might happen.
Well there is a possibility that Callie will not come back. What if she stays to NY, what if 1cent go to another state and Callie follow here there again, etc…You can’t blame Arizona for thinking like that.
Well if she decided to stay in New York that would be different, but as it is right now, Arizona went straight to the nuclear option in this scenario. The problem I’m having with the whole thing is that neither of them are even trying to talk about it. Callie screwed up and just assumed that she’d take the kid without really thinking of Arizona, and Arizona is overreacting like she thinks Callie is trying to take full custody. I mean the simple solution is for them to split custody of her for 6 months each. Yes it would suck but it’s fair.
Well that is their problem “Communication” but Callie said that Arizona can visit Sofia it just means that Callie is taking the full custody of their daughter and how will you do split custody 6 months with each mom, 6 months in NY with Callie and 6 months in Seattle with Az. So Sofia will go to a school for few months in NY and few months in Seattle, thats ridiculous.
Callie & Mark are the ones in control of Sofia with rights. Marks dead, that leaves the bio mother.
Neither. They are both (as are most of Shonda Rimes’ characters) horrible, horrible people.
Ha! So true.
I thought the episode pretty cleverly showed two side of pre-emptively calling lawyers.
1- April overhears something, overreacts, gets a lawyer and restraining order, and makes things worse for herself.
2- Arizona is basically told Callie is moving, confers with a lawyer, but doesn’t act until she sees that Callie is making arrangements before they’ve even discussed the issue.
I’m on neither side. Wish they would both move to NYC or anywhere else well removed from the Seattle area.
They are probably doing this because the actress who plays Arizona is very pregnant. They may do a couple of episodes all about Callie or have Arizona go on leave or something to cope/fight this.
I miss Mark.