Purpose Mentoring

Top 5 reasons why people choose NOT to go for counselling: 1) Cost. 2) Time. 3) Counselling is "only for people who aren’t strong enough to cope by themselves". 4) It is an "indulgence' or a 'luxury" to talk about yourself. 5) Fear of opening up a box that you would prefer to stay closed. ---- This list is based on a lot of conversations I have had over a number of years, with friends, family, colleagues, clients and fellow counsellors. Reasons 1 and 2 are understandable, practical ones, and they tend to be the main give. However, when you scratch the surface, most people could find the time and money for therapy, if they really wanted to - especially with the prevalence of flexible, online counselling (e.g. Better Help) that can fit around other commitments. Reasons 3, 4 and 5 tend to be the underlying ones that prevent people from giving therapy a try. They may be based on previous experience, the opinions of others, general misconceptions about what counselling is, or a fear of opening up 'Pandora's Box'. Therapy isn't easy. It might not be something you look forward to, and you may not always feel 'lighter' after sessions. But, if you haven't tried it before, or if you were put off it by some previous experience, and you are finding things a struggle at the moment...would it be so bad to give it a go? If you would like to have a FREE initial conversation, to explore how counselling could help you, I will be very happy to have a chat, in total confidence, with no obligations beyond this. Please feel free to send me a private message if you would like to talk. #counselling #therapy #mentoring #purpose #wellbeing

That's my BACP licence renewed for another year! BACP stands for "British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy". To be a BACP member, you need to have obtained a BACP-accredited qualification and must be able to demonstrate a range of qualities and knowledge to be able to practice in an ethical way as a counsellor / therapist. I am so proud to be a BACP member, as the guidelines they set out for ethical practice are recognised and respected internationally. In a world where we are talking more and more about mental wellbeing (which is a great thing), I am 100% behind counselling becoming more regulated. If someone has decided to take the positive step to go into therapy, it is crucial that they meet with a trained professional who is qualified to work with them in a healthy, confidential, respectful and appropriate way. As one of the conditions of my membership, and for the benefit of both my clients and me, I attend regular supervision, as well as my own therapy. It keeps me grounded, and enables me to be fully present in every client session, to provide the support my clients need. If you would like to learn anything more about what BACP membership is, please get in touch. #counselling #psychotherapy #certificate #purpose

Right now, who do you know who is struggling? Family members....friends....colleagues... Who comes to mind? Perhaps you know someone who has gone through a recent bereavement, break-up, accident, new baby, financial setback, or some kind of trauma. In fact, you probably know several people who are having a tough time right now. Now, ask yourself: Have YOU done everything you can to help this person? Of course, there may not be much that you can do - and ultimately it will be down to this person to find the support they need. But when was the last time you spoke with them, told them how great they are and how much they mean to you, and asked (genuinely) how they are? Sometimes it can be hard to know HOW to support the people around us, especially if we are somehow involved in their story. Sometimes there is only so much support we can give others when we also need to look out for ourselves. But someone will always appreciate a kind message and a smile, at least. And if you think it is appropriate to say, you are very welcome to pass my details on. As a qualified counsellor who has also worked in a pressurised recruitment environment for over 17 years, I provide both long-term and short-term help to people who are trying to balance their day-to-day work alongside any challenges they have at home. The most important thing is to remind everyone they are not alone. #counselling #purpose #mentoring #wellbeing

Carrot or Stick? I work with a range of team managers and business leaders, helping them navigate personal and professional challenges at work and at home. One theme that comes up a lot is knowing how to handle UNDERPERFORMANCE - something that very few leaders enjoy doing. Every situation is different, but often the main dilemma is whether to use the 'Carrot' approach (encouraging, nurturing, incentivising, rewarding) or 'Stick' (presenting the threat of punishment, and following through). As a leader, you will already know that some situations clearly call for Carrot, and some for Stick. But what about the AMBIGUOUS ones, when the solution is less clear? For example: ➡️ The long-serving team member who has been a consistent performer for 5+ years, but their performance has started to drop and it isn't obvious why. ➡️ A trainee who joined 6 months ago and is doing some things well but has picked up some bad habits. ➡️ A high performer who bills well, but isn't using the CRM the way you want them to. ➡️ Someone who demonstrates great potential and has flashes of brilliance, but doesn't sustain their performance. How many times can they go on a PIP? You might handle the situation differently depending on the individual. One person's personality style may mean they need sharp, clear direction; whereas another person may respond better to a softer, more patient approach. So, where do YOU draw the line? How do YOU make your judgements - and are there times when your approach has backfired? As a counsellor who has also run a recruitment business, I love helping people figure out the answers to these questions. Everyone is different, and I don't have a specific framework or model that I tell people to use. Instead, my approach is to listen, and to provide my clients with a safe, confidential space where they can talk through their leadership dilemmas and gain greater insight into WHY they may think, feel and act in a certain way. They can then make more purposeful, confident decisions. If you can relate to any of this, and would value some private, impartial support, away from colleagues, friends and family, please get in touch for a FREE initial chat. #purpose #leadership #management #wellbeing

What does it feel like to be in your 50s or 60s? For the last few months, alongside my counselling work, I have been tutoring groups of people aged 50+ who have been out of work for a while. In collaboration with our local job centre and the DWP, the 5-week courses I have been running are designed to help people recognise their own potential and rebuild their confidence. I have worked with over 25 people so far, and everyone is different. Everyone has their own unique skills, experience and career history. Some people are restricted by their physical health or a disability. Some have gone through redundancy. Some have families, while others live alone. The one thing that links everyone, regardless of their circumstances, is MINDSET. And often, behind their mindset, is a lack of confidence. Every single person who has attended these courses has a huge amount to offer, including practical expertise, common sense, communication skills, leadership experience, and the wisdom and perspective that only come with age. The problem is that so many of these people feel useless. They feel their time has come and gone. They think no-one will want to employ them. From an outsider's point of view, these people are ALL employable. But...they rarely believe it. So, a lot of the work we do together is designed around helping them to rebuild their confidence, recognise their transferable skills, and enjoy themselves in a group setting. Alongside this, we work to develop and update their technical skills so they can compete with others who are also applying to the same jobs. What an experience it has been! And it has helped my counselling skills so much too, as I have gained a deeper appreciation for the challenges that anyone can feel as they approach their 50s and 60s. Do you consider yourself to be "older" (because it isn't necessarily linked to how old you actually are...)? What challenges do you face, and how do you tackle them? Do you know, or work with people who are in their 50s or 60s? Remember - they may not be the loudest, quickest or most technically savvy: but the value and wisdom they bring to a workforce is worth its weight in gold. #boomers #olderworkers #mindset #training

So...you're a few days into January and have a clear plan for the year ahead. 2025 is going to be better than 2024. You know what you need to do to smash your targets. It's all there for the taking, etc etc etc. But...there's a niggling voice in the back of your mind that says it won't happen. ...or, maybe you are going through difficulties at home that are distracting you, and it is hard to stay focused. ...perhaps you aren't feeling great, both physically and mentally? ...maybe you're carrying grief, or a breakup, or have a challenging family situation? Maybe you have a young family at home and are having difficulty sleeping? You want to focus at work, but you can't switch off these other responsibilities and difficulties from home. So, what can you do? First of all, recognise that you are a human being. You aren't perfect. You are trying your best. ...and you don't have to go through all this alone. It can be so helpful to talk, privately, with someone who is separate to colleagues, family and friends. Someone who is a qualified counsellor, but who also understands what it is like to have a pressurised job. My name is Steve and I am a BACP-qualified counsellor with around 15 years' experience of helping people who are going through different personal challenges. Alongside this, I worked for over 17 years in recruitment and ran a successful staffing business. I understand the pressures you may be under, and working with me will give you a confidential, safe space to talk through whatever challenges you are facing at the moment, whether at work or at home. If you would like to learn more, please get in touch and I will be very happy to have a free initial chat, with no obligations beyond this. YOU DON'T HAVE TO GO THROUGH THIS ALONE. #purpose #wellbeing #recruitment #motivation

Working in Recruitment in 2025: What is it going to be like? Most of the people who attend sessions with me work in recruitment, and I was a recruiter myself for over 17 years before becoming a full-time counsellor - so the Recruitment world is something I am very passionate about. No doubt you will have seen various stats talking about the industry, and how 2025 may compare to 2024. My view isn't based on stats, and I haven't scrutinised all the data. My input is more subjective and anecdotal, based on daily conversations with recruiters at all levels, including business owners. ... A lot of recruitment companies are going to struggle in 2025. Fact. Last year wasn't easy. Several businesses lost key individuals, reduced headcount and shelved plans for new investment. But...a lot of companies reported a MUCH better Q4 than in 2023. And several companies I know have an intake of new trainees in January, based on projections that are - cautiously - very optimistic. The recruitment industry ALWAYS bounces back, and I have no doubt that it will do so again. But...you HAVE to look after your people. Relying on the resilience of your employees is only going to take you so far. Yes, there is an argument that the people who have survived 2024 will continue to rebuild in 2025 - but it is important to remember that every person on the team is a human being. Everyone is trying to manage: - Relationships - Family - Health worries - Money troubles - Social life - and their own personal struggles that you don't know about What kind of support do you provide to your people, that gives them real, meaningful help? How much do you listen to what your people are telling you? When people in your team left last year, what did they say in their exit interviews? How much have you taken note of this, to avoid similar situations again? I believe strongly that this year will be a make-or-break year for many. Perhaps now is the time to really think hard about whether you are providing the kind of environment that recognises and respects your people as individuals, and will, in turn, get the best from them. #purpose #recruitment #wellbeing

Do you suffer from a bad back? A lot of people I meet in Purpose sessions are trying to manage the pressures of work and home, whilst also coping with physical difficulties, such as: 🚫 A bad back 🚫 Persistent headaches 🚫 Neck aches 🚫 Chronic pain across their body 🚫 Tightness in their shoulders 🚫 Stomach issues I am not a Doctor, but I have seen and heard so many examples of physical discomfort (bad backs being the most common) that I recognise there is often a genuine link between how we feel emotionally and how we feel physically. We often go to a chiropractor or physiotherapist to help us manage or fix the physical issue. We may go to a doctor to get pain relief medication or a referral. But what about other factors? Do you feel ‘weighed down’ by things? Do you feel you are ‘carrying’ anger, bitterness, resentment, guilt, sadness or other uncomfortable feelings? If so, perhaps these burdens are affecting your physical health. Perhaps, alongside addressing physical issues, it may be helpful to help yourself by working through the personal challenges behind them. This isn’t easy to do, but with the right help it can have a huge impact and help you feel lighter and more free. #counselling #stressmanagement #backpain #health

This picture was taken on a recent walk down to the beach in my home town on the South Coast. I love to look out at the horizon - it is so full of possibilities. Wellbeing at work is more important than ever. If you are in some kind of leadership role, hopefully you are acutely aware of how your people's wellbeing has an impact on their productivity, and how communication within the team improves when everyone feels heard and looked after. ...SO, what can you do if you, or people around you, are struggling? What if it feels like your cup is so full that you can hardly take on any more before it starts overflowing? What if someone in your team keeps bursting into tears? What if there is a person at work who reacts angrily to things, creating an atmosphere that makes it hard for people to get on? What if everyone is feeling so under pressure with their sales targets that it just isn't any fun any more, and the 'buzz' has gone? What if you are grieving (and this doesn't need to be from a recent bereavement)? What if you can't switch off from work when you get home, or you have so much going on at home that you are struggling to focus on your work? ------ Each of these scenarios is SO commonplace right now. At the start of the New Year, it is a good opportunity to reflect on how YOU are, as well as thinking about people you work with and what support they are (or aren't) getting. I provide FREE initial consultations for anyone who would like to have a chat about how things are going for them, or to talk about some of the initiatives that other companies have put in place to support their people. If you would like a free, private chat with no obligations whatsoever for any future work, please send me a direct message and we'll arrange to talk at your convenience (including outside of working hours). There is nothing more effective than talking it through with someone who is completely separate from family, colleagues and friends. #mentalhealthawareness #wellbeing #purpose #counselling

Turning 30. Turning 40. Turning 50. A new manager. A new baby. A new office. A new team. A death in the family. Moving house. A health scare. All big life events can be unsettling. Sometimes exciting, yes - and often full of new opportunity…but unsettling nonetheless. What about your job? If you are in a stable position, then it might be your one constant during times of change at home. But what if you think it is the JOB that needs to change? If you spend time on LinkedIn, you will be convinced that moving jobs is the answer. And…maybe it is. But equally, if you met with your manager and voiced your worries, you may be convinced that STAYING is the answer. So what do you do? What is the right decision to make? You will get different opinions, whether you talk to friends, family or colleagues, or whether you read books, spend time online, or watch self-help guides on YouTube. While these different perspectives can be helpful, they can also make things more confusing. Sometimes there is no substitute for talking things through with a qualified professional, who is separate from everyone else and has no agenda, and who can really listen to you and help you make up your own mind, for YOURSELF. What’s more, it is completely private, so no-one else needs to know. To find out more about Purpose sessions and how they can help you, please get in touch. #purpose #crossroads #life