As an executive coach, how can you give feedback that truly resonates with your clients?

When the mirror gives feedback, people believe it. So from the MIRROR learn to #1. Give specific data #2. Not be judgmental #3 Not be directive #4 Give feedback which is holistic not one-sided and as a COACH your intention is to #1. Serve the person #2. Always respect the person #3. Be sensitive to the receptivity of the coachee to the feedback. #4. Learn the skill of giving feedback

As an executive coach, provide feedback that resonates by being deeply present and empathetic. Tailor your feedback to align with the client’s unique context and goals, ensuring it is both relevant and actionable. Deliver it from a place of understanding and support, not judgment. Use clear, concise language, and include specific examples to illustrate your points. Encourage self-reflection, inviting them to explore how the feedback relates to their behaviors and beliefs. This approach, grounded in empathy and relevance, helps the feedback to be not just heard, but truly internalized and acted upon.

Feedback has a negative connotation associated with it in view of its inherent bias towards fault identification. When a Coach comes across as focused on identifying perceived faults or gaps of the the client, it leads to a defensive mode and shutdown. (S)he feels judged and the all important psychologically safe space disappears. The basic tenet of Coaching is that you are who you are and you are ok from where you stand. How are you perceived by others though ? How can we together, co-create a pathway that helps change this perception in a positive manner where required. It would help if the Coach puts forward observations as perceptions and how these are impacting the client's interaction with their environment.

When providing feedback to executive clients, I find it paramount to do so in a timely yet consistent manner. Reacting immediately after key moments preserves fresh recollection, but diving straight to advice risks coming across as reactionary. Setting regular coaching sessions establishes structure for reflection and discussion. In these, I aim to draw out clients' own insights first before respectfully offering perspective. Consistency in our rhythm and approach also encourages vulnerability and honest dialogue. Most importantly, feedback stakes hold value to the extent it comes across as truly aimed at long-term growth, not performative evaluation.

Creating a space and building trust must first happen to be effective. Active listening and being respectful and present will be key to allowing clients to share insights, opinions, examples about their experiences. There must not be judgement or assumptions to allow the client to express openly. Your role as coach is to help unlock and stretch the thinking of the client for them to create their own paths forward by asking powerful questions. Feedback can be given with the permission of the client but should not be forced or imposed.

I'd also offer 1. Using Self as an Instrument: Contract with a client to bring your own reactions into a coaching conversation as an offering to consider (when appropriate). Such sharings are frequently powerful in providing additional insights for the client. An example would be sharing an overpowering sense of urgency as a client described the formation of a strategic task force to address systemic challenges. The sharing catalysed an exploration and commitment to more time bound activities and bringing to the surface previously unexamined personal preferences. 2. Rehearsing upcoming conversations live with the client and responding in the moment to provide insights. This dynamic approach enables 2 way feedback and safe practice .

Feedback’s are always thought by coaches as a corrective action to improve the one who is coached. But actually feedback should only lead to introspection and questioning as to what is really working and why and is that for my highest good. Before feedback there has to be lot of trust developed between the two and faith that contrary to what might look like a negative impact of change it will be blessing in long run, and that journey needs to be discussed with the one who is coached for better understanding of why the change is needed if it is really needed!