What are the best ways to handle coachees with conflicting beliefs?

1 Acknowledge and respect

The first step is to acknowledge and respect the coachee's beliefs, even if you don't agree with them or share them. This means listening actively, empathizing, and validating their perspective, without judging, dismissing, or imposing your own views. Acknowledging and respecting the coachee's beliefs shows that you are genuinely interested in understanding them and that you value their autonomy and diversity.

2 Explore and clarify

The second step is to explore and clarify the coachee's beliefs, as well as the underlying assumptions, emotions, and motivations behind them. This means asking open-ended, curious, and non-threatening questions that help the coachee articulate and examine their beliefs, as well as the evidence, consequences, and alternatives to them. Exploring and clarifying the coachee's beliefs helps them gain more awareness, insight, and clarity about their thinking and decision-making processes.

3 Challenge and support

The third step is to challenge and support the coachee's beliefs, especially if they are limiting, distorted, or inconsistent with their goals or values. This means providing feedback, offering different perspectives, inviting reflection, and suggesting experiments that help the coachee test and modify their beliefs, if they choose to do so. Challenging and supporting the coachee's beliefs helps them develop more adaptive, flexible, and empowering mindsets that enable them to achieve their desired outcomes.

4 Align and leverage

The fourth step is to align and leverage the coachee's beliefs, especially if they are positive, constructive, or congruent with their goals or values. This means reinforcing, celebrating, and amplifying their beliefs, as well as helping them apply them to their actions and behaviors. Aligning and leveraging the coachee's beliefs helps them harness their strengths, resources, and potential to overcome obstacles and create positive change.

5 Mediate and facilitate

The fifth step is to mediate and facilitate the coachee's beliefs, especially if they are in conflict with other coachees or stakeholders. This means creating a safe, respectful, and collaborative space for dialogue, negotiation, and resolution, as well as helping the coachee communicate, listen, understand, and appreciate different viewpoints and interests. Mediating and facilitating the coachee's beliefs helps them build trust, rapport, and synergy with others, as well as find common ground and mutual benefit.

7 Here’s what else to consider

This is a space to share examples, stories, or insights that don’t fit into any of the previous sections. What else would you like to add?