How can you identify and adjust to your client's communication style?

I have found that with time, experience and patience with yourself, your own communication skills become significantly better by listening at different levels during the meeting. Start with active listening, move onto understanding what they mean and finally ask yourself why they have that point of view. Only then should you add significance to your discussion.

Identifying and adjusting to a client's communication style is crucial in effective communication. Start by observing their verbal and non-verbal cues, listening actively, and asking for feedback. Tailor your communication to match their preferences, whether they're analytical, expressive, or assertive. Flexibility in your approach and a willingness to adapt to their style fosters better rapport, understanding, and successful interactions.

The most impactful communication goes beyond mere words. It's about truly being present, genuinely listening, and tapping into what's being shared and what remains unsaid. The VAK (Visual, Auditory, Kinesthetic) model, a cornerstone of NLP, teaches us that people have different preferred modes of processing information. Some are visual, resonating more with imagery; others are auditory, deeply influenced by tonality and sound, while kinesthetic individuals connect with touch and emotions. We can tailor our communication to resonate profoundly by attuning to these subtle cues. Being present and actively engaging with the VAK model means we're not just hearing but truly understanding, building deeper connections and trust.

I work with my client to develop their own personal brand. We focus on 5 steps: Audit Build Authentic self, Give it Texture, Build the plan, then, Execute. I want my clients to understand how they are showing up today and then develop and document how they want to show up in the future.

Understanding your own communication style and how you respond to others both opposite and similar is a great starting point and a reminder to check how you're reacting to your coachee. Listening to what they're saying and noticing if that's congruent with their body language and tone can be really insightful and often highlights a problem or discomfort that isn't being raised.

There are different ways to identify communication styles such as: Notice whether your client tends to talk more or less, try to feel if he/she listens to you when you speak and try to understand the vibe and level of interaction during the conversation. All are important tools to get a more clear view of the chances of having a productive and genuine communication.

As a former professional dancer, I think a lot about the connection in a coaching partnership and how it is similar to the connection between two dancers. When you have a truly powerful connection between two people, it is about presence and flow more than it is about noticing specifics and consciously responding. Think about the conversation like a piece of orchestral music. How are you both in harmony? How are you both aligned in tempo and in rhythm? Are you playing the piccolo and they're playing the tuba or are you both in the strings section? As you focus in on the conversation and allow distractions to melt away, you will find yourself in deep connection with your coaching partner and 'how it happens' simply becomes 'it's happening'.

The key to this is deep, intentional listening, and asking thoughtful and high-impact questions. Seek to understand before you seek to inform. And don't just listen to what they say, listen to their body language, how they react, the way in which they speak (fast? Slow? Loud? Quiet?). If you listen intentionally then it is easier to find yourself attuned to their needs, and how they prefer to communicate. Also, at the beginning of an engagement, it never does any harm to ask about the best way to work with them. One way to do this is ask about the best working collaboration they have been a part of - what made it a great collaboration? What behaviours and principles were in place that made it successful? What best practices can be learned?

In my experience, different clients have different preferences for the way they receive feedback and guidance. Adapting your communication style ensures that your advice is more likely to be well-received an acted upon. When clients feel that you “get” them and speak in a way they understand, trust is established more easily, which vital for a productive coaching relationship.

I think it's important to include their learning styles along with their communication styles. One of my clients understands deeper when we use analogies and we put everything into them when we work through opportunities. Another client prefers to relate things and understand things spiritually first. And another prefers direct, maybe even sharp, feedback. Understanding how to approach each client is imperative to helping them understand at deeper levels.

As an introvert, my early life taught me the power of active listening and keen observation. These skills have proven invaluable in my journey to empower women leaders. To apply these principles and build trust while adapting to your client's style: Begin by giving your full attention. Are your clients inclined towards structured, data-driven discussions or prefer personal anecdotes and engagement? Ask questions that encourage deeper conversations to understand their preferences. Your intuition is a superpower. Train yourself to notice non-verbal cues - body language, facial expressions, and tone of voice. These offer invaluable insights into their communication style. Customize your approach to make your interactions more effective.