How can you support a family member who feels misunderstood?

First, ask yourself if you are listening to understand. Most of the time we listening to form a response. We are literally thinking about what we are going to say instead of listening to what they are saying. Second, acknowledge that your realize they feel misunderstood and you most definitely want to understand them. This require you to genuinely, authentically care about what they care about. And also requires you to meet them in their pain rather than give them solutions. Finally, practice these first two with everyone so that you get much better at responding in this way with the people you love.

Listening actively is the basis of strong rapport and effective relationships. Some suggestions: -Reflect back key ideas or thoughts the person shares with you. -Ask them to expand on their ideas. -Ask them to be more specific. These are indicators that you are listening and the other person will feel seen.

It’s also good practice to know what they want to achieve with their communication. Do they want you to listen so they can vent, do they want your opinion or do they want your help? Being clear on what they need from the communication can help too

And being mindful not to jump into ‘me too’ stories with the intention of validating but the effect of making it more about you than them. It’s a very easy and common trap. Also, being mindful of our tone when acknowledging others feelings so that it doesn’t come across as patronising or insincere

Acknowledgement without judgement can help the other person feel seen and understood. My experience has shown that by reassuring that those feelings are acceptable, whatever they are, the other person begins to release any internal conflict that may be experiencing. Feelings are human repsonses and shouldn't be supressed or judged.

1. Listen actively: Be fully present when they talk and avoid interrupting. Show you care by making eye contact and nodding. 2. Validate their feelings: Let them know it's okay to feel misunderstood. Phrases like "That sounds really frustrating" or "I can see why you'd feel that way" can be helpful. 3. Offer practical help: If they're overwhelmed, see if there are chores you can take on or errands you can run. 4. Just be there: Sometimes all someone needs is a shoulder to lean on. Spending time together, even in silence, can show you care. Remember, sometimes the best way to help is simply to be understanding and present for them.

Knowing someone is there to help can be a very powerful tool to overcoming the emotional challenge involved. There is a difference between saying and doing. Rather than just telling someone you are there for them, demonstrate it. - Take care of small chores for them. - Make them a meal. - Help someone close to them eg spouse or child

1. Listen actively: Let them know you're there for them and encourage them to share their feelings. Don't interrupt or judge, just listen patiently. 2. Respect their way of expressing themselves: Some people might want to talk it out, while others may prefer writing, art, or even exercise. Let them find what works best for them. 3. Offer suggestions: If they're stuck, gently suggest different ways to express themselves, like journaling, drawing, or going for a walk. Remember, sometimes just being there and showing you care can make a big difference.

When you help someone feel seen and understood, you can get them to a place where they feel safe to express their true feelings. This is crucial to overcoming the emotional challenge. Allow them to express themselves in their way, naturally, when they are ready.

People don't always want you to solve their problems for them, they often just want someone to appreciate and understand what they are going through. Listen, support, be present and keep an open mind, allowing yourself to understand their perspective as best you can. You'll help them more than you can ever know.

Let them know you are there for them, whether they need advice, help finding solutions, or someone to talk to. Sometimes, knowing they have your support can make a significant difference. Recently, my wife (Feliz) and I celebrated our 47th wedding anniversary. She asked me if I would pay my debt with my retirement distribution. Her advice, council, and encouragement were "I want to avoid seeing you in debt while we are both retired". She helped me find a solution, so the debt was reduced by 6K June 2024. Knowing that I have her respect, support, and faith and that I would follow through made the difference. After years of looking at my mindset, I can see her wisdom, and it was a relief to know I want to finally take responsibility.

First, decide your INTENTION- in his Ted Talk about listening, Julien Treasure lists intention as one of the most important filters that we have to listening. I would challenge you to go into conversation and discussion, not with the intention to listen… but the intention to CONNECT. Also, DON’T RUSH THE AWKWARD SILENCE- in the literature, in practice and in conversation, it’s important to NOT be afraid of the silence. Tolerate it… You don’t have to fill the space because often it rushes the outcome and you’re likely to miss out on what someone really has to share if you don’t allow that space. SILENCE IS TRUST, so honour the trust that family member has placed in you.