Here's how you can address feedback that is perceived as unfair or unjust.

Perceived unfair feedback? Listen fully, then act. Silence the noise, get the facts, and respond with strength and clarity. Weak leaders react; strong leaders respond. Be strong.

When you get feedback which is unfair, you need to defend yourself. But first listen carefully and communicate to prove your point right . But it should be done in a respectful manner. You know that the right feedback will be helpful for your growth.

Addressing perceived unfair feedback involves several key steps. Firstly, listen fully to understand the critique's context and intent. Clarify any points that are unclear to gain a comprehensive understanding. Reflect honestly on the feedback, considering its validity and how it aligns with your goals and values. Respond calmly and professionally, expressing your perspective respectfully. Seek support from trusted colleagues or mentors to gain additional perspectives and guidance. Finally, use the feedback as an opportunity for growth and development, moving forward with a proactive mindset.

Listening is hard in this instance but absolutely critical. Here is how to do it: 1. Let the person finish fully with all they have to say 2. Now pause and think, silence is acceptable for a minute at this point in the conversation 3. Start with a clarification question politely like "can you help me understand why you feel I .... 4. Now assess the situation - is the feedback fair and can be accepted? Is there a misunderstanding that can be easily corrected right now? If neither of these options seem clear at this point, then you probably should not proceed to accept or defend at this moment of time but acknowledge receiving the feedback with thanks and just ask for time to ponder on it before providing your point of view on it.

Quando confrontado com feedback que parece injusto, resistir ao impulso de interromper ou se defender é fundamental. Respirar fundo e ouvir completamente demonstra respeito e abre espaço para compreender plenamente as críticas. Mesmo mal entregue, o feedback pode conter insights valiosos. Ouvir também permite tempo para processar as informações e responder de forma ponderada, em vez de reativa.

'Unfair' feedback may simply be poor, or misplaced, communication. By clarifying what the feedback means and what outcomes are expected, you can get down to the facts - are the points tangible and real, or is there something more at play? If you drill down through clarification you may also help the person giving the feedback understand what they are trying to achieve. Perhaps, as is often the case, their only intention is to give feedback. That's fine. If they want something more, you'll learn what it is.

When faced with feedback perceived as unfair, don't react defensively. Instead, focus on clarification. After listening attentively, ask specific questions to understand the other person's perspective. This could involve seeking details on unclear points or inquiring about the specific situation that led to the feedback. By clarifying, you can ensure you're both on the same page and identify any potential misunderstandings. This approach demonstrates your willingness to learn and sets the stage for a more productive conversation where you can potentially address the concerns or provide your own viewpoint.

Always ask for specific examples and instances to corroborate poor feedback. Sometimes, the feedback is misconstrued and perceived by the interviewer's own bias to make a point. You must demonstrate willingness to accept the feedback but be able to clearly articulate the flaws or misunderstandings to find the right resolution post a careful evaluation and review.

The reflection on the feedback should ensure one is able to discern the truth from any embellishments. If certain factors in the feedback are correct, one should be thankful to receive feedback which helps in self improvement.

It's important to pause and consider the feedback, even if it stings. While our first instinct might be to reject it entirely, taking a step back allows for honest reflection. Is there any truth buried beneath the perceived unfairness? Could there be a different perspective to consider? This reflection isn't about admitting complete fault, but rather acknowledging if there's a grain of truth that can help you improve. By approaching the feedback with an open mind, you can turn a potentially negative situation into a valuable learning experience.

Feedback é um presente, podemos aceitá-lo ou não. É muito importante ouvir atentamente o que o outro está compartilhando à nosso respeito, sem arrogância ou orgulho. Muitas vezes estamos enviezados por nossa rotina ou por nossas percepções e não observamos claramente como isso está refletindo nas pessoas em volta. O feeddback pode não estar realmente alinhado com o que você pensa ou deseja fazer, mas é importante refletir: por que está causando essa percepção externa? Talvez seja uma oportunidade de melhoria e não uma crítica destrutiva.

Be willing to accept feedback that you already know and consciously or subconsciously been trying to implement and improve upon. It is a great validation point that you are headed in the right direction in terms of self improvement. Sometimes, a third person view helps reveal behaviour traits and flaws which you would otherwise never fully know.

Ehrlich und vor allem sich selbst reflektieren und sich selbst bewusst werden. 😀 Daraus lernen und das Erlernte weitergeben.

In my professional experience, very few people have the ability to stay calm in the face of adverse feedback. Trick is for the person to comprehend the problem fully before formulating any response. Ask clarifying questions before reacting. Its important to breathe evenly and focus on the problem not how it makes you feel. Its also important for the person delivering the message to ensure its is done in a calm and constructive manner.

After attentively listening to the feedback, take a moment to clarify any points that might be misunderstood. Briefly reflect back what you heard to show you were paying attention. Then, calmly share your perspective. Stick to the facts and avoid getting defensive. Explain your thought process or actions behind the situation. If there's room for improvement you can acknowledge that and offer solutions. Keep your tone professional and focus on finding common ground.

After listening, clarifying, and reflecting on feedback, your response is crucial. Responding calmly and professionally, even to poorly delivered criticism, showcases your maturity. If you disagree, present your perspective factually, avoiding emotional reactions. Should the feedback be valid, acknowledge it and outline your plan for improvement. This approach not only upholds your dignity but also fosters a culture of constructive dialogue. Moreover, it sets a positive example, demonstrating that feedback, regardless of delivery, can be a tool for growth and improvement.

Talking the feedback through with someone else - for example a mentor, trusted confidant or therapist - will help you process the feedback. It helps make sense of feedback and move through any emotions that may have arisen within you as a result. This is important to ensure that you can move forward as soon and painlessly as possible. And ensure you don't hold on to resentment or other negative emotions that may affect your performance or relationships.

When grappling with challenging feedback, seeking support from a trusted colleague or mentor can be invaluable. Their external perspective can illuminate aspects you might have overlooked and offer balanced advice on handling the situation. Engaging in a dialogue with someone who understands your professional context can significantly shift your perception, transforming feedback into a learning opportunity. This collaborative approach not only helps in managing immediate reactions but also reinforces a support network, fostering resilience and continuous growth in your professional journey.

Accepting feedback and moving forward is important to build your own self worth and resilience as a professional. Letting go of negativity is also crucial for one's own wellbeing and self care.

Each situation looks completely different from other perspectives. Ask others who might have observed your behaviour and get additional views and insights. I have received completely different feedback from different people in the same room before. And I have had 180º different opinions about the performance or behaviour of others than colleagues who observed the same situation. It shows that we humans construct our world based on our background, mental models and beliefs. There is not the reality but a reality for each of us. Take from feedback what helps you grow and let the rest with the other person.

Ask for a follow-up meeting with the feedback provider to discuss your perspective and clarify misunderstandings. This proactive approach demonstrates your commitment to understanding and addressing the feedback constructively. For instance, after receiving what I perceived as unfair feedback from a colleague, I requested a follow-up meeting to discuss specific instances and provide additional context. This meeting not only clarified misunderstandings but also allowed us to find common ground and strengthen our working relationship.

Feedback says as much if not more about the feedback giver than about the feedback receiver. In each feedback are several levels of information: ➡️ factual information ➡️ requests from the giver to the receiver ➡️ information about the relationship between the two ➡️ self revelation, i.e. the feedback giver is showing a lot about their own view of the world, values and mental models Especially if the feedback feels unjust or unfair it is important to look at these levels as well. Ask yourself: ❓ Why is the other person taking your actions so much to heart, that it elicits such a strong reaction? ❓ What is their part in the whole situation?

Ask relevant questions/ examples to get clarity wherever it seems to be unclear, seeking the clarity can really help to see the feedback from a constructive perspective. Don’t jump to the conclusion. Maintain your own composure, dignity and even if the feedback giver has not shown the respect, you should still be respectful! It’s not about them, it's about you. By being respectful you actually do a favour to your own mental peace without making the situation worse. Reflect, take action if feedback seems relevant to improve upon else move on!