Coaching For The STEM Woman

That Oval Office exchange gave me corporate PTSD. I saw so many parallels to what women experience in Corporate America as I watched yesterday's tense exchange between Trump and Zelensky: "You should be thanking..." "You're in no position to..." "You don't have the cards." Sound familiar? This TV moment was a masterclass in power dynamics I've experienced many times. When a boss dismissively told me "I have nowhere to grow you" after an exceptional annual review. When my big boss's sendoff was "We sure got our money's worth out of you." These weren't acknowledgments of value, they were reminders of power imbalance. For years, I faced glass ceilings while achieving outsized results. When I asked for a promotion and was told "There is no need for a VP level marketing role in a business unit." Despite transforming the function across the enterprise. Despite proving my worth time and again. Despite precedence. Instead, I got pats on the head, a company award, a stretch assignment when I was already stretched. But never the title, position, status or resources I deserved. I climbed the stairs when others rode the elevator. I gave proof when others showed potential. I was too direct when others were passionate. For most of my career I settled for less than I was worth because deep down I didn’t believe I was worthy. Women are conditioned to: - Be grateful - Know their place - Be patient - Take what's offered - Seek validation This is "you don't have the cards" thinking. But here's what I know now: You do have cards. You have talent, vision, expertise, experience, grit, networks, options. And hopefully FU money in the bank. Ladies, you don't need an invitation to play your cards. Instead of folding, you can up the ante, go all in, or even bluff. In tough negotiations, here's my advice: ➡️ Know your value. Document your achievements. Hard data trumps gaslighting. ➡️ Stack your deck early. Power comes from alternatives you've already developed, not ones you scramble to find when backed into a corner. ➡️ Power up through coalitions. I thrive because of my tribe. Women who remind me who the eff I am. ➡️ Set boundaries early. I failed at this for a long time. Took promotions without titles. Let work impact my health. Said yes to filling every hole I found. ➡️ Be willing to walk. The day I declared I was quitting my boss and made three demands, I got results. ➡️ Believe the truth when it surfaces. When I was finally so undeniably proven and was told "You've outgrown the organization," it validated everything I'd felt. "You will not be able to be your truest self in this role" is corporate-speak for "We can't handle your authentic power." That's when you flip the script and ask, “Is this place, this boss, this job worthy of me?” Your strongest position comes from the cards they don't know you hold. When someone insists you have no cards to play, don’t fall for it. Keep improving your deck and then play your hand. ♠️

Last Friday, I received a follow-up email from an applicant I had rejected. In it, he shared: "Two years ago, recruiters were pinging me non-stop, and now I can’t even get an interview. I’m concerned I’m missing something, and the information online is all over the place." I immediately hopped on the phone to reassure him that it was *not* him; it’s the market. As I spoke with him, I couldn’t help but think about all the talented people in my network who might be asking themselves the same question right now. So, if you’re out there wondering why your job search feels so much harder than it used to, let me say this, recruiter to candidate: It is not you. The hiring landscape today is different than it was 2021 or 2022. Companies have pulled back. Hiring cycles are longer. Competition is steeper. But this moment in the market does not define you, and it’s not a reflection of your skills, experience, or worth. If you’re feeling discouraged, I hope you keep going. Keep networking, putting yourself out there, and believing in what you bring to the table. Recruiting is cyclical, and the market will shift again- it always does. And if you need a little reassurance along the way, know that you’re not alone. ❤️ #JobSearch #Hiring #Recruiting

This is the real reason women in senior roles don’t succeed. + It’s not about competence. + It’s not about capability. + It’s not even about opportunity anymore. It’s about power. And the fact that too many men still don’t know how to take orders from a woman. We celebrate when a woman reaches the C-suite. But what happens next? Resistance. Undermining. Dismissal disguised as “feedback.” Men who have taken orders from other men their entire careers suddenly find it uncomfortable. They hesitate. They challenge decisions they wouldn’t question from a male boss. Because deep down, too many still equate female authority with weakness and male dominance with leadership. I still remember an incident from years ago. I promoted a woman into a senior leadership role, someone brilliant, capable, and more than deserving of the position. Within a week, the shift was obvious. The same male peers who once collaborated with her seamlessly began questioning her decisions, debating instructions, and turning meetings into subtle power struggles. Nothing about her leadership had changed, except that now, she had authority. And for some men, that was the problem. This isn’t an isolated incident, the data confirms it: ✔ A Harvard Business Review study found that men are more likely to challenge, interrupt, or downplay a woman leader’s authority compared to her male counterparts. ✔ Women hold just 10.4% of Fortune 500 CEO roles, despite proving equal or better leadership performance in key areas like innovation, collaboration, and crisis management. ✔ In a study of performance reviews by Stanford Business Group, women received more vague feedback, while men received actionable, career-advancing advice. So it’s not about ability. It’s about the system still not being ready for women in power. This needs to change. ✅ Stop expecting women to “prove” themselves more than men: A man’s confidence is taken at face value. A woman’s is questioned. That needs to end. ✅ Call out the double standards: Men are “assertive.” Women are “aggressive.” Men are “leaders.” Women are “bossy.” This language shapes perception, and it needs to go. ✅ Women should never undermine their value: Your leadership, expertise, and authority deserve to be recognised. Don’t wait for permission, demand the seat, own the space, and ask for what you're worth. Women don’t need help succeeding. They need men to stop getting in the way. Because the problem isn’t women’s leadership. It’s the world’s inability to accept it. #womeninleadership #equality #futureofwork  Shilpa Khanna, Sheryl Sandberg

People are still finding the Feb 3rd webinar we did on 2025 Job Search Highlights (focused on the US job firings in global development in late January and Feb). How do I know? Because people are still requesting the Resources document for the webinar. So we’re posting the webinar info again. It gives you a quick overview of a few key job trends going into 2025 and spends a lot of time on what YOU can do for your next career step including 8 categories of transferrable skills to help you. (Agenda sections in pic below.) Watch the webinar on YouTube: https://lnkd.in/eTsAtprd Request the 2025 Job Search Highlights Resource Document (SueMentors): https://lnkd.in/eUFdMFm8   And you can also get guided help and feedback from SueMentors in a no-cost short course to refresh/build your Professional Presence! (4 Steps in 4-5 weeks) -Get attention with your summary para -Capture your brilliance in evidenced-based examples in your historical document -Tailor your resume to a job posting -Get attention on your Virtual Visibility (your LinkedIn profile)! Build and Update Your Professional Presence in 4 Steps ›  FAQs: https://lnkd.in/egNVDgZv › Registration of Interest form: https://lnkd.in/dUwh6j9q

Ever had someone try to derail you in a meeting? Take credit for your idea? Mansplain or tone-police you? Undermine your authority or throw your team under the bus? What they’re really doing is trying to take you to a second location—a space where: ✅ They control the narrative. ✅ You’re forced onto the defensive. ✅ Power dynamics subtly shift against you. And the worst part? The usual advice for handling this is useless. It’s either: - Too tactical (“Say it this way instead,” “Soften your tone,” “Lean in, but not too far”). - Too reactive (“Here’s what to say after you’ve already been undermined”). But power isn’t just about what you say—it’s about who decides what counts as leadership, credibility, and authority in the first place. That’s what the Never Go to a Second Location framework is about. It’s not just about speaking up—it’s about refusing to play by rules that were never designed for you to win. It’s about spotting the setup before you get pulled into a defensive position and shifting the frame of the conversation before someone else controls it. Because when you control the frame, you control the outcome. Join me for two free webinars where I’ll break down the strategies we teach inside Fix The Broken Rung’s leadership programs: 1️⃣ Never Go to a Second Location—The Executive Playbook for Shutting Down Gaslighting & Holding Your Ground 🗓️ Wed, February 26th @ 1pm ET (This one is all about what to do in the moment when someone tries to undermine you. Immediate, in-the-room tactics to hold your ground, shut down gaslighting, and keep control of the conversation.) 2️⃣ Build an Unshakeable Foundation—How to Proactively Set the Stage, Control the Narrative & Lead on Your Terms 🗓️ Thurs, March 6th @ 1pm ET (This one is about the long game—how to shift the power dynamics before you even step into the room. We’ll cover proactive strategies to shape the narrative, set the terms of engagement, and lead on your own terms.) ➡ If you attend, you’ll get an exclusive preview of how we approach leadership inside Next Rung (for executives) and Jump the Rung (for mid-career leaders). 👇🏽👇🏽 Links in comments