“One day in class 10 as I took my seat, the entire room suddenly erupted in laughter. When I turned around, I saw someone had written ‘Lady’ at the back of my chair. The teachers also saw it, but nobody said a word. Growing up in Jamshedpur wasn't easy. I sensed something different about myself and my feelings but I was unaware of what these were, and when I looked around, I couldn’t find anyone to share what I was going through.
The names they called me – ‘Chhakka,’ ‘Hijra’ – just because I didn't fit under the definition of an ideal ‘boy.’ I couldn't wait to get out of school, out of that town. College, I hoped, would be different. But the bullies followed me. The continuous taunts made me build a fortress around myself and at last all that mattered were good grades and a dream job, where I naively thought, "At least workplace mein toh mein safe rahunga."
If only I'd known then how wrong I was. The harassment followed me there as well and the name calling, hushed whispers about how I looked never stopped. A few of my work buddies didn’t hesitate to call me ‘Bobby Darling’ as well. I'd never felt so alone, so broken. But I was fed up with hiding who I was. I was almost 24 when I decided, “I have to tell my parents now.”
But even at home, I was brushed off. My parents said, ‘Don't worry, it's just a phase. Get married, everything will be fine.’ I knew then that things wouldn't change unless I did something about it. You know that famous quote, ‘Be the change you want to see in the world.’ I decided to become that change. So, in 2017, I co-founded Pride Circle where we're all about making workplaces and schools safer for LGBTQ+ folks. We do training, help people find jobs, create a marketplace for LGBTQ+ entrepreneurs, and so much more to make the workplace & educational spaces more inclusive.
And in 2019, we even organized Asia's biggest LGBTQ+ conference and job fair. One of the candidates at the fair told me, “Sir mein bhaag ke aaya hoon yahan, kyon ki agar mein ghar ruk jaata toh meri zabardasti shaadi karwa dete, aur ab tak mere 2 bacche bhi hote”. People still ask, "Why talk about this at work?" But if they could see the impact, the lives changed...they will never ask me such questions again.
Things have gotten better for me, but so much LGBTQ+ harassment still goes unnoticed and unreported at workplaces and otherwise. People are afraid to speak up. That's why my team and I keep working to create workplaces where being queer isn't a barrier to a fulfilling life. Because no matter who you love or how you identify, you should be able to work where you dream and live the life you want.”
Featuring: Ramkrishna Sinha
Written by: Ritvik Mawkin
#MondayMotivationwithHOB
Thank you to the Fitch Group, Inc. for their support and participation! We appreciate James Woolley, Senior Operations Associate and Fitch Pride Network Global Co-Chair, for contributing to the panel on breaking into financial services at the #Workfair Conference.