Jaz Ampaw-Farr’s Post

You only get 80 Christmases (if you're lucky and avoid skydiving reptiles!) OK, maybe a few more - as long as you stay healthy and manage to avoid having a tortoise dropped on your head by a passing eagle. (Actual stated cause of the untimely death of Greek playwright Aeschylus in 458 BC, so, you know, it could happen!) Christmas can be a difficult time. Even Waitrose’s best festive ad does nothing to reduce the very real pressure of navigating divorce, redundancy, sick relatives or debt. You can’t control external factors but here's the good news - you can choose to Re-Story Your Christmas. My first 25 Christmases were pretty grim. As a kid, I spent several alone, hiding in fear or going hungry. As a teen, I navigated Christmas on the streets. As a student with no family to return home to in the holidays, I cleaned pubs, danced in nightclubs and juggled in the streets to survive until my next student loan kicked in. As an adult I set about re-storying painful Christmas memories so that the anger and hurt I felt didn’t become the driver for my Christmasses going forward. I landed on a new Christmas story to use as a mantra: "If you need help, make a request. If you don't need help, help someone else." This new story helped me to: 1. Stop suffering in silence (driven by another old story that I deserved misery because I wasn't good enough) 2. Avoid getting sucked into the 'buy-buy-buy-ness' of Christmas once I had my own kids - it was sooo tempting to overcompensate for my own childhood of scarcity Over the years, we’ve used our new story to create new memories. We’ve had an open house for anyone spending Christmas alone. Joined in the school shoebox scheme. This year we're doing this reverse advent calendar - a collaboration between Martin Lewis and The Trussell Trust. It takes all the thinking out of giving by providing you with a list of essential items Food Banks need over December. If this season brings up painful memories for you, make this the year you Re-Story your Christmas.

This Christmas, numbers were high (family of 12!) but gifts were low. Talk about “Be fruitful and multiply”. Too many presents to buy. It's almost a good thing I don't have friends to buy even more gifts. LOL. JK. Yeah, we weren't able to give each other gifts in great numbers as we usually do. I remember we each received probably 7 gifts. Is that normal for you? It’s normal for a big family like mine. We all getting older so we have more bills to pay and stuff. Christmas is definitely when money is spent most. We jokingly said to each other “There’s no Christmas this year”. I had no idea what I would buy for the family or if I should. Of course, adults don't care about receiving, mainly for the kids you wanna buy something at least, and we did. For my Original Fam which does not include extended family, I wanted to do something special while not breaking the bank. Something I learned is that every one of us has the potential to multiply. Haven't you felt something inside of you saying I was born for more? The multiplication for you could be in wealth, status, power, etc. For me it’s family. Rich in love and poor in cash. The poorest rich man. The Bible says God already put the seed inside of us to grow. In other words, let me use what I already have on the inside. Pour it don't hoard it. So I used my skills in design and my job to be able to print shirts with an image of my OG Fam(that picture means a lot to us in memories) It’s worth more than the $150.00 it costs to print them. Even though my boss didn't want to charge me for the shirts. I used what was on the inside. God loves multiplication and he wants you to multiply.

"Bill Perkins wrote, 'You can’t be generous when you’re dead.' Our giving is much more meaningful when we’re alive than after we’re gone. Here are four reasons why: 𝐆𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐞𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐠𝐢𝐟𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐨𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭. Without anticipation, traditions and rituals, wrapping paper and cards, faith and forethought, Christmas morning is just a bunch of stuff and overflowing bags of trash. Without the thoughtfulness applied, we could just skip all reciprocal birthday gift exchanges and save the money. Yes, the act of giving and receiving and all that precedes and follows, is what makes a thing a gift. Gifts are more valuable when they’re needed. 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐠𝐨𝐚𝐥 𝐨𝐟 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐧 𝐢𝐧𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐥𝐚𝐮𝐝𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞—𝐟𝐮𝐥𝐥 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐩. But let’s run the numbers here: If you live to be, say, 85, that would make your kids in their late fifties or early sixties, right? Yes, an infusion of cash at any age would likely be helpful, but how much more valuable would it be if your kids were getting portions of their inheritance at the points in their lives when it would truly be the most helpful? A down payment on a house—especially these days! A kitchen or bath makeover, an all-expenses-paid fifth wedding anniversary trip, with babysitting included. Taking your teenage grandchildren on a special trip or helping to fund their college in a creative way. And although it would admittedly be categorized as one of those “good problems to have,” there’s even a case to be made that if your children are very successful financially that a major infusion of cash or assets later in life could be a burden, at least from a tax planning perspective. 𝐄𝐱𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐡 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐬𝐭𝐮𝐟𝐟. By a roughly two-to-one ratio, studies suggest (and your heart confirms) that we derive more joy from spending money on experiences than stuff. Experiences generate memories that pay dividends over generations. No experiences, no memories, no dividends. And it’s hard to have an experience when you’re gone. 𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐜𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐫. This last point may be the toughest to hear, but let’s face it, if you give during life, it’s clear that you intended to give, whereas an inheritance, however welcome, might just be…leftovers." Tim Maurer

Preparing for the Future with Family at Heart As Christmas draws near, we’re reminded of the importance of giving—not just gifts, but opportunities, support, and love to those who mean the most to us. For many, this is a time to think about how we can help our children and grandchildren thrive long after the holiday season has passed. The gift of a bright future is one of the greatest legacies we can offer. Imagine knowing that your children will have the resources to attend college, start families of their own, buy their first homes, and build lives full of joy and possibility. These dreams can become a reality when we plan today for tomorrow’s needs. The Bible speaks of the wisdom of leaving a legacy: “A good person leaves an inheritance for their children’s children” (Proverbs 13:22). This inheritance isn’t just financial—it’s the lessons of love, responsibility, and faith that guide our children as they build their futures. Modern financial tools like life insurance and savings plans give us the power to secure these opportunities. They ensure that our children and grandchildren have a foundation to stand on as they face life’s challenges and celebrate its milestones. This isn’t just about wealth; it’s about creating stability and showing the depth of our love and care. This Christmas, let’s look beyond the presents under the tree and think about the lasting gifts we can provide: security, opportunity, and a legacy of love that spans generations. 👉 Let’s explore how we can secure your family’s future together: https://lnkd.in/eBwNBcrp. 🌟 Stay connected with us for more family-focused insights: https://lnkd.in/ecFPzCmm

🌸 Mother’s Day Giveaway Alert! 🌸 Nominate a mom for a Free Will-Based Estate Plan! This Mother’s Day, let’s celebrate the amazing moms in our lives with a gift that echoes love and security. Nominate a special mom to win a FREE Will-Based Estate Plan from @neyenslaw. It’s more than a gift; it’s peace of mind. 👉 How to Enter: 1. LIKE this post 2. FOLLOW or LIKE our page 3. TAG a mom in the comments who deserves this thoughtful gift. Share a bit about what makes her special. Each tag is an entry! 🌟BONUS POINT🌟: SHARE this post on your timeline to spread the love! Let’s shower our moms with the love and recognition they deserve. 💐 The contest ends Friday, May 10th. A winner will be selected based off of entries, shares and any stories submitted. The winner must come in and complete their plan within 6 months of being contacted. #MothersDayGiveaway #EstatePlanning #CelebrateMoms #neyenslaw #mnestateplanningattorney #willsandtrusts #2024mothersdaygiveaway #will #peaceofmind #mnestateplanning #woodburyattorney #estateplanninglawyer #planforthefuture #yourlegacy #powerofattorney #healthcaredirective #estateplanninglawfirm #retirement #inheritance #livingwill #trusts #assetprotection #estate #charitableplanning #medicalassitance

What’s the hardest thing you might need to give this Christmas? I know every family is different. And I’ve said before how if you’re a coach then then hardest people to coach are your family. At the same time, they’re more often the ones that have you either coaching yourself or seeking coaching from others. So with Christmas approaching, I was with a client this week, and the hardest gift for this client to give this year was the gift of forgiveness. They’re in a position where they can buy all the gifts in the world for anyone they want… They can buy all this stuff… But they won’t forgive. For so many people, there are people this Christmas that won’t be at their Christmas gathering because they have so much bitterness in their heart that they have extradited themselves from their family and friends. How many people do you know that haven’t spoken to their family members for years? And when you get to the root cause of why, it’s usually the smallest of hurts. But at this time of year that hurt is magnified. And the more that hurt is held on to, the worse it becomes. If only they could set themselves free… The gift of forgiveness will begin that process. And it costs nothing. But it’s truly the most valuable.

Hosting a Christmas party doesn't have to drain your wallet! Here are some budget-friendly tips to celebrate the season without overspending: - Potluck Feast: Invite friends and family to bring their favorite holiday dish or dessert. This way, everyone gets to enjoy a variety of flavors without one person bearing the entire cost! - DIY Decorations: Get creative! Use materials you already have at home to craft festive decorations. Consider making paper snowflakes, stringing popcorn, or even using natural elements like pinecones and greenery. - Inexpensive Activities: Keep the holiday spirit alive with fun, low-cost activities. Host a holiday movie marathon, play Christmas-themed games, or even have a DIY ornament-making session! - Secret Santa Gift Exchange: Instead of everyone buying gifts for each other, opt for a Secret Santa where each person draws a name and only buys one gift. Set a budget to keep it manageable! Celebrate the joy of the season without the stress of overspending! Share your favorite budget-friendly holiday party tips in the comments below! If your debt has become unmanageable and you owe over $20,000 then click the link below for debt relief. We can help! bit.ly/3PRUQ99 #ChristmasOnABudget #HolidayCheer #Americor

This post got me thinking about business advice. Like Terence Channer’s story about his mother gifting him money even when he didn’t need it, many of us receive advice we feel we don’t need. We often brush it off with a polite nod, thinking, I’ve got this, or I know better. But what if we approached advice differently? The gift of advice, much like a mother’s financial gift to a self-sufficient adult, isn’t always about need—it’s about care. The person offering their thoughts genuinely believes it might help, even if we don’t see its value in the moment. What if we listened with an open mind? What if, instead of dismissing it, we acknowledged the effort and intent behind it? That doesn’t mean we have to act on every piece of advice we’re given, but we could recognize it for what it is: a gesture of support, concern, and goodwill. Sometimes, the value of advice only becomes clear later. And even if it doesn’t, letting someone know you appreciate their care—just as Terence savors the ice cream bought with his mother’s gift—can brighten their day. Advice, like any gift, is a reminder that someone took the time to invest in us. Let’s appreciate it for what it’s worth.

I got a great reminder from Valorie Burton, MAPP, MCC and thought it would be great to share. With Christmas fast approaching, many people are feeling stressed by the expectations, shopping, and obligations that come with the holiday season. While it’s important to give of yourself, it’s equally important to engage in some extra “self-care” during the holiday season. A variety of issues cause stress during the holidays, including overspending, social obligations (parties, decorating, cooking, hosting), gift buying, travel, and family. Depression is the source of stress for many, particularly those who are alone during the holidays, and those dealing with the death or illness of a loved one, or a recent divorce or separation from family and friends. Here are a few strategies for dealing with stress this holiday season: 1. DECIDE WHAT WORKS FOR YOU Decide what is most important to you this holiday season. Then center your holiday around it. Just because your friends’ idea of Christmas is elaborate gift giving and 10 parties in three weeks, doesn’t mean you have to do the same. Do what works for you. 2. PLAN A BUDGET If you haven’t finished shopping, take time to plan your gift budget and stick to it. Don’t feel pressured to spend money you don’t have. If you do, you’ll have a bad financial hangover in January. It’s OK to tell people you are cutting back this year … they may even be relieved to hear you say it because it will take the pressure off of them, too! 3. REMEMBER THE “REASON FOR THE SEASON” Remember that Christmas is a religious holiday by not allowing commercial expectations to take over. Since Christmas is a celebration of the birth of Christ, take time to incorporate a spiritual tradition into your holiday celebrations such as Christmas Eve or Christmas day church service. Some of my favorite childhood holiday memories are going to church at midnight on Christmas Eve and searching the sky for Santa and his reindeer during the ride home.