Welcome to the first Moody Talk on Interpersonal Effectiveness where we'll be talking about the goals we need to remember when in conversation with one or more people. This can be in our personal relationships or our office/school relationships.
How many of us HATE conflict? ✋ How many of us AVOID conflict? ✋ And how many of us GIVE IN when in conflict? ✋
There are effective ways to cope with conflict in a safe way without giving up on our goals. And this month we will be going through skills sets for the 3 clarifying goals in Interpersonal Situations.
OBJECTIVES EFFECTIVENESS: Getting What You Want from Another Person
RELATIONSHIP EFFECTIVENESS: Keeping and Improving the Relationship
SELF-RESPECT EFFECTIVENESS: Keeping or Improving Self-Respect
As always, if you have any questions or comments about Interpersonal Effectiveness, please let me know. DM me or comment below!
If you are having a hard time coping with your emotions or you feel hopeless, I hope you will reach out to a trusted loved one, your doctor/therapist or the 988 suicide text hotline. You are not alone. You are loved 🩷
#MyMoodyMonster#MoodyTalks#TedTalks#InterpersonalCommunication#InterpersonalEffectiveness#Relationships#SelfRespect * #YouAreNotAlone
* #ItsOkNotToBeOk
* #SupportSystem
* #CommunitySupport
* #MentalHealthCommunity
* #MentalHealthFamily
Hello everyone and welcome to another month of Moody Talks. So this month we will be honing in on interpersonal effectiveness, which is a part of DBT dialectical Behavioral therapy. Now the past few months we have done other parts, three other parts of DBT and that is mindfulness, emotion regulation and distress tolerance. So I highly recommend you go back. And learn more about those as well because I found even though this particular therapy was created for people with PTSD, I think the concepts and the coping skills that come with DBT are great for all people for, you know, just learning more about your emotions and how to better cope with them. So if you haven't gone back to the last three months, you know, maybe check those out, You can do this without. Without those, except for maybe mindfulness. Mindfulness was the first one we talked about and it tends to build up basic coping skills that that you know you can use through these other tenants, so to speak. So let's get into into personal effectiveness. So who here hates conflict? Who here? Avoids conflict. Who here gives into conflict? Right, I'm sure there are so many others out there, not just me, who do not like conflict and try to stay away from it and many times give in to it because we don't have the skills to get what we need out of them, right? We don't have the skills to help us feel more confident in not only getting what we need, but also maintaining relationships with the with others and our own self respect. OK, so that's what we're going to talk about. Today and throughout the next three weeks, we're going to go through coping skills that can be used for for getting interpersonal effectiveness. So we're going to start number one with the overall goals of interpersonal effectiveness. Now I'm going to put on my readers because I'm old and I can't see close up anymore. So this is my first. This is my first movie. You talked with the readers goals of interpersonal effectiveness. Be skillful in getting what you want in need from others. So that's the number one goal. Get others to do things you would like them to do. Get others to take your opinions seriously. Say no to unwanted requests effectively. So that's goal #1 be skillful in getting what you want and need from others #2 Build relationships and end destructive ones. Strengthen current relationships. Don't let hurts and problems build up. Use relationship skills to head off problems. Repair relationships when needed. Resolve conflicts before they get. Overwhelming find and build new relationships and end hopeless ones. So I find that the the bottom 2 are are are just as important as the information at the top like strength and current relationships. I feel like finding and building new relationships is really important and when we can understand. You know, interpersonal communication and effectiveness. We can tell when we are in a good or bad relationship earlier. We have to decide then if we want to stay in that relationship or start that relationship. But you know, we're gonna we're gonna need to understand what who this person is. And I think why working through interpersonal effectiveness, you better understand what you need out of a relationship. So building a new one, you already are going into it knowing what you need and also and a hopeless relationships. This is really hard for so many people. This is really hard for me and. You know, I've done it many times in the past and honestly, it is a great skill to have to be able to do to end a relationship that just isn't working for you. OK. And then finally, walk the middle path, create and maintain balance in relationships, balance acceptance and change in the relationship. OK, so that's basically, you know, like you're giving and receiving. That's what this is. But you're receiving. You're not just giving. You're not the caregiver. You're not the giver giver. You don't give everything and they give nothing. This is how you walk the middle path and you get both. You give and you receive. OK, so those are the goals of interpersonal effectiveness. And then now we're going to go through the three clarifying goals in interpersonal situations. OK, so. There are three there. There are three goals here, OK? And each one is really important. And they all have their own skills, coping skills that go with it. And these are the three that we're going to create the coping skills for throughout the month. OK, So first, objective effectiveness, getting what you want from another person, obtaining your legitimate rights, getting another person to do something you want. That person to do saying no to an unwanted or unreasonable request. That can be really hard for many people. It's hard for me. Resolving an interpersonal conflict, getting your opinion or point of view taken seriously. I think a lot of us don't feel like we're actually being listened to or taken seriously. And with this objective effectiveness, this is this, this coping skill that we're going to be working on next week. I think it's going to be really helpful for those who feel like they need to be able to push their ideas and what they say to be taken more seriously. OK, the next one is relationship effectiveness, keeping and improving the relationship. So acting in such a way that the other person keeps liking and respecting you. I mean, it sounds very simple, but then balancing immediate goals with the good of the long term relationship, Okay. Maintaining relationships that matter to you. I know this all sounds very, very simple, but it really isn't for us. I think that a lot of human beings have a hard time with, you know. These, this goal here, maintaining relationships that matter to you without again giving in and giving all of yourself without receiving OK. And then the final one is self-respect, effectiveness. This is my favorite one. Keeping or improving self respect. Respecting your own values and beliefs. Very important. Always remembering our beliefs and our values and living by them. And this means not letting people. Make you do things that you don't feel comfortable with and that are not a part of your values. Acting in a way that makes you feel. Moral, right? So you want to feel good about the things that you do and that people are not causing you to go against your values and beliefs, OK. Acting in a way that makes you feel capable and effective. So you know, you're acting, acting in a way that makes you feel capable and effective. You know, basically that means doing the work that you want to do, doing and getting what you need with your own ideas and values and not, again, not going against these things, not going against your values and beliefs. OK. Questions how do I want to feel about myself after the interaction is over whether or not I get the results or changes I want. So how do I feel about myself? This is all this whole self respect part I think is really really really important to remember. OK and then the other is what do I have to do to feel that way about myself? What will work OK, so this is about. Like I would say for the most part, this is about being in conflict and, you know, holding on to your own values, which, you know, when you go against your values, you have guilt. That is what the emotion guilt is about when you yourself go against your own morals, values, ideals. OK. And so we don't want to feel guilty when we do things that others are asking us to do or, you know, not being. Able to do things that are in our value that somebody has stopped you from doing something that you that you value or you believe in. OK, so I really hope that you guys will hold on for these three because I think interpersonal effectiveness is so incredibly important to learn. We don't learn them in childhood because we have a a different natural balance for the most part. It's our parents and us, you know, we have peers in the sense of our brothers and sisters, but for the most part, families don't exactly have like. Equal kind of interpersonal confidence in themselves and when we get out into the world, it tends to be shaped in whatever way these conflicts, these relationships are coming into our lives. Are we learning that we can be in a relationship without changing our own value system? You know, can we get what we want from others without? Maybe giving in into other things and do especially when it comes to values, you know, you want something, so somebody else is like, well, if you do this, I'll do that. Well, I mean, you may end up finding out that that that you do that is something that's against your own values and therefore yourself respect is going to be compromised. So. Listen in for the next three weeks. These are great coping skills that you'll learn for each of those. And we will see you again next week. Have a good week.
Welcome to the first Moody Talk on Interpersonal Effectiveness where we'll be talking about the goals we need to remember when in conversation with one or more people. This can be in our personal relationships or our office/school relationships.
How many of us HATE conflict? ✋ How many of us AVOID conflict? ✋ And how many of us GIVE IN when in conflict? ✋
There are effective ways to cope with conflict in a safe way without giving up on our goals. And this month we will be going through skills sets for the 3 clarifying goals in Interpersonal Situations.
OBJECTIVES EFFECTIVENESS: Getting What You Want from Another Person
RELATIONSHIP EFFECTIVENESS: Keeping and Improving the Relationship
SELF-RESPECT EFFECTIVENESS: Keeping or Improving Self-Respect
As always, if you have any questions or comments about Interpersonal Effectiveness, please let me know. DM me or comment below!
If you are having a hard time coping with your emotions or you feel hopeless, I hope you will reach out to a trusted loved one, your doctor/therapist or the 988 suicide text hotline. You are not alone. You are loved 🩷
#MyMoodyMonster#MoodyTalks#TedTalks#InterpersonalCommunication#InterpersonalEffectiveness#Relationships#SelfRespect * #YouAreNotAlone
* #ItsOkNotToBeOk
* #SupportSystem
* #CommunitySupport
* #MentalHealthCommunity
* #MentalHealthFamily
Welcome to our 4th Moody Talk on Interpersonal Effectiveness. We'll be focusing on Self Respect Effectiveness or How do I stick by my own morals and beliefs during a conflict.
We all have a hard time coping with conflicts - and, unfortunately, sometimes we will back down from that conflict while agreeing to something we may not feel lines up with our own values. DBT created a set of skills to help remind ourselves how to feel good about our decisions made during a difficult situation.
The acronym FAST gives us keywords to remember while we are trying to do what is best for us.
F: (Be) Fair to yourself and others. Remember to Validate your own feelings and wishes as well as the other person's.
A: (No) Apologies. Don't apologize for making your request or for having your own opinions or disagreeing with the other person.
S: Stick to your Values. Don't sell out your own integrity for reasons that are not EXTREMELY important. Stick to your Guns.
T: (Be) Truthful. Lying and manipulating will not help the situation. Don't exaggerate or make up excuses.
As always, if you have any questions or comments about Interpersonal Effectiveness, please let me know. DM me or comment below!
If you are having a hard time coping with your emotions or you feel hopeless, I hope you will reach out to a trusted loved one, your doctor/therapist or the 988 suicide text hotline. You are not alone. You are loved 🩷
#MyMoodyMonster#MoodyTalks#TedTalks#InterpersonalCommunication#InterpersonalEffectiveness#Relationships#SelfRespect * #ConflictResolution
* #ItsOkNotToBeOk
* #SupportSystem
* #CommunitySupport
* #MentalHealthCommunity
* #MentalHealthFamily
Welcome to our 4th Moody Talk on Interpersonal Effectiveness. We'll be focusing on Self Respect Effectiveness or How do I stick by my own morals and beliefs during a conflict.
We all have a hard time coping with conflicts - and, unfortunately, sometimes we will back down from that conflict while agreeing to something we may not feel lines up with our own values. DBT created a set of skills to help remind ourselves how to feel good about our decisions made during a difficult situation.
The acronym FAST gives us keywords to remember while we are trying to do what is best for us.
F: (Be) Fair to yourself and others. Remember to Validate your own feelings and wishes as well as the other person's.
A: (No) Apologies. Don't apologize for making your request or for having your own opinions or disagreeing with the other person.
S: Stick to your Values. Don't sell out your own integrity for reasons that are not EXTREMELY important. Stick to your Guns.
T: (Be) Truthful. Lying and manipulating will not help the situation. Don't exaggerate or make up excuses.
As always, if you have any questions or comments about Interpersonal Effectiveness, please let me know. DM me or comment below!
If you are having a hard time coping with your emotions or you feel hopeless, I hope you will reach out to a trusted loved one, your doctor/therapist or the 988 suicide text hotline. You are not alone. You are loved 🩷
#MyMoodyMonster#MoodyTalks#TedTalks#InterpersonalCommunication#InterpersonalEffectiveness#Relationships#SelfRespect * #ConflictResolution
* #ItsOkNotToBeOk
* #SupportSystem
* #CommunitySupport
* #MentalHealthCommunity
* #MentalHealthFamily
Enduring Relationship Conflict is something many of us face—how many relationships do you wish you had handled better? I know for myself, there are plenty. Every day brings new challenges, whether with family, colleagues, friends, or casual acquaintances. With our diverse backgrounds, upbringings, cultures, and even personal traumas, our approaches to resolution can vary significantly. Studies show that individuals who actively practice conflict resolution skills see a 50% improvement in relationship satisfaction (American Psychological Association). Growth starts with improving how we connect on all levels. #RelationshipGoals#ConflictResolution#PersonalGrowth#EmotionalIntelligence#HealthyRelationships#SelfImprovement#MindfulLiving#LifeLessons#BetterTogether#CommunicationMatters
Monday 29th July - Well being Workshop
Workplace conflict costs the UK an estimated 28.5 billion a year, but that aside...Why settle for less than YOU are worth?
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Want to learn how to speak up with more confidence and understand why it is that you always seem to be the one that 'gives in'?
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It's not that easy to reset the boundaries with somebody when you've always been the one to fold.
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That doesn't mean that you have to live the rest of your life that way, it just means that you have to know EXACTLY how you want to be treated.
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When we people please for too long we lose track of who we really are, and one day we wake up and feel completely lost. We don't feel like ourselves.
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Good communication and a deeper understanding of why conflict arises is a good place to start if you are planning on taking your life back. We are only here once, make it count.
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Next Monday's session may help you redraw the lines, find the words and courage to set clear boundaries, and turn a new positive page in your life.
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What else have you got to do on a Monday night that's more important than that?
#leicestershire#communication#conflict#community#wellbeing
Psychologist & Relationship Coach
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I help people navigate modern relationship challenges with confidence and resilience, fostering lasting connections.
🌟 Navigating Relationship Dynamics: Understanding Infidelity Signs 🌟
In both personal and professional spheres, the strength of our relationships greatly influences our overall well-being. As we strive for emotional health, it’s important to recognize the signs of distress in our connections.
🔍 When it comes to romantic relationships, certain behaviors may indicate underlying issues:
Emotional Distance: A sudden withdrawal can signal unmet needs.
Changes in Routine: New secrecy around schedules may raise questions.
Increased Privacy: Guarding phones or digital communication can be telling.
Altered Behavior: Unexpected changes in appearance or interests might suggest external influences.
Decline in Intimacy: A noticeable drop in connection can often signal that something is amiss.
Signs of Guilt: Elevated anxiety without clear cause may be worth exploring.
While these signs can be concerning, it's essential to approach the situation with empathy and open communication. Conversations about feelings and needs can pave the way for deeper understanding and healing.
✨ Remember, every relationship is unique, and context matters. Let’s foster environments where dialogue thrives, allowing us to navigate challenges together.
What are your thoughts on maintaining healthy relationships? Share your insights below! 👇
#EmotionalIntelligence#RelationshipDynamics#Communication#MentalHealthAwareness#SadiaPsychology
Real test of your relationships!
No conflict is a sign of "NO" relationship.
Conflicts are essential for healthy and long lasting relationships however conflicts where we get deeply hurt and try to hurt others lead to toxic relationships, they may last long but are detrimental for our wellbeing.
These are a few signs of healthy management of conflicts:
1. Respect: Participants are respectful and avoid belittling language, sarcasm, or talking over each other.
2. Emotional control: Participants maintain their composure and emotional control.
3. Empathy: Participants try to understand the other person's perspective.
4. Problem-solving: Participants focus on what caused the disagreement and how to avoid it in the future.
5. Resolution: Participants are willing to compromise, forgive, and move on.
#relationships#healthyconflicts#conflictmanagement#relationships#relationshipcounselling#indianinstituteofrelationships
Photo by Sarah Kilian on Unsplash
The rule is to stick as close as possible to the truth of what we're actually feeling, and to communicate it as best as possible with the other person.
It takes practice and can be more difficult for those without role models or guidance to do so. Counselling can be the place to develop the self awareness and interpersonal skills to do this. It can also help develop confidence, assertiveness, emotional awareness and vocabulary.
https://lnkd.in/eYenjapu
It's NOT them!
It's not even you...
💡 According to research published in the Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, conflicts in relationships are often rooted in specific behaviors or patterns rather than inherent flaws in the individual partners.
💔 These behaviors can include poor communication, lack of empathy, emotional distancing, and unmet needs, among others.
I can help you identify and address these behavioral patterns through effective communication, conflict resolution, and relationship skills training, which can lead to significant improvements in relationship satisfaction and overall well-being.
🎯 So first learn what will be helpful to thrive not just survive.
Effective communication can be learned!
All you have to do is decide and invest!
When you view your troubled partner with an empathic eye, don't forget you are not responsible for fixing them, rather encourage them to get the right help.
Break your patterns and then help them break their patterns.
🎯 Schedule a session now to get clarity on which program you can take with me and how to invest in yourself!
Love and light ✨
Dr. SY
#neuroencodingspecialist#relationshipcoach#couplecoaching#premaritalcoaching#personaldevelopment#investinyourself#bethechange#walkthetalk
