10 Strategies for Dealing with Difficult Callers

If you’re a call centre supervisor, team leader or manager, chances are, your team members are receiving phone calls from individuals whose negative emotions and difficult behaviours can range anywhere from being “dissatisfied” but calm right through to being “explosive” and out-of-control. And, as you know already, these sorts of caller behaviours seem to be getting worse, and these negative caller behaviours can and will take a toll on your call-centre staff who are fielding calls and doing their best to try and help these caller’s concerns.

So, here are 10 practical ways call centre and customer service employees can reduce the possibility of making a difficult conversation during a phone call even worse. And, in many cases, calm the caller down when their emotions are running high.

1. All staff who interact on the telephone or in person should receive regular training in dealing with difficult people. All employees should be trained in dealing with difficult callers and how to de-stress and decompress afterwards. After all, being on the front line and taking difficult calls regularly can affect employees’ emotions. The last thing you want is high staff turnover because your employees are struggling with the pressure of their role. Give your team leaders and supervisors skills in conducting mini-training sessions at the start of a new week or at the beginning of a shift. The supervisor can share a scenario with her or his team and ask their team members for ideas about handling difficult calls. As you know already, repetition is the mother of all learning.

2. Remain calm. How can you expect to calm down a caller without remaining calm? No matter how strong the urge is, avoid fighting back. One of the easiest and fastest ways to remain calm is to breathe deeply (and quietly) when you hear someone tensing up or getting upset over the telephone. Breathing slowly and deeply while taking a difficult call allows your brain’s neural pathways to work out what’s going on. If you’re stressed, panicky, triggered or upset, you’re more likely to say or do something that will only exacerbate the problem with the caller. Slow down and breathe!

3. Remember that it’s not personal. This can be hard to hear, especially if a caller is yelling, but you must learn how to deflect negative emotions and realise that hurt people will often hurt other people. In this case, verbally. Even if a caller is yelling, calling you names, or threatening you, this is a sign that they are not in control of their emotions. Someone getting angry at you doesn’t make the situation any more pleasant to deal with, but patience and a calm and relaxed mind and voice, as well as knowing you are not taking their ‘bait’, will often mean the caller will quickly calm down.

4. Use the caller’s name. It’s important to try and get the caller’s first and last name early on in any phone call – and to use it. Callers are less likely to lose control of their emotions when they are being addressed by their name or title and surname.

5. Give them your first name. If you want to get a caller’s name early in a phone call, offer them your name first. You will build rapport when you’re on first-name terms, or they know your name. Even if you give them your first name and use their title and last name, you’re inclined to get a better outcome by making the conversation more personable.

6. Tell them what you can do and not what you can’t do. One of the first things you can do when someone is upset or angry is to ask them to tell you their problem. Write down what you are hearing, and repeat what you’ve heard, what they say the problem is, or what help they are asking for. Even if what they are asking for is unreasonable or can’t be done, let the caller know what you can do at that time. Frame your words in the positive. Nothing gets a customer going ballistic faster than to give them an upfront refusal, a big fat “no”, or come across as authoritarian.

7. Ask for more information. When a caller is upset or angry, they are not thinking from their neocortex – or the human thinking brain. They are in a fight or flight mode. Psychologists refer to this as having an amygdala hijack, and once someone who is having an amygdala hijack is experiencing emotions that are out of control. It’s impossible to rationalise with them. This is why it is important to keep any angry caller calm. One way to keep a caller calm and stop the possibility of them having an amygdala hijack is to ask them questions. Not too many, but enough to help you gain a better picture of the situation and show them that you are listening.

8. Ask them for help. A powerful way to reduce a caller feeling upset or angry is to ask them for their help. Using a phrase like, “Okay, I understand. Now, I’m going to need your help with something.” It keeps their cognitive functions working and reduces the likelihood of them having a meltdown (amygdala hijack).

9. Always tell them what you’re going to do next. One of the worst things to do when someone is agitated, upset, or angry is to place them on hold and keep them on hold for long periods. Never put a caller on hold without first letting them know what you will do next, i.e., talk to your supervisor, and in the meantime, you will need to place them on hold.

It’s important not to leave them on hold for too long. Even if you’re still waiting for a supervisor to respond, get back to the caller and let them know what you are doing and what is happening at your end. If it takes multiple minutes or longer to receive an answer from a supervisor or someone else, offer a call back if that’s possible. But, if you can’t call them back and they must hold, keep getting back to them every minute or so, and provide them with an update on what is happening at your end.

10. Learn to de-stress after a difficult call. The first few moments after coming off a tough call can often be the worst. You probably have adrenaline pumping around your body, and depending on what was said during the call, you may still feel angry about how you were spoken to. The sooner you forget about that call and move on to the next, the better. Whether sitting in a call centre or working from home, stand up after a challenging call and stretch slowly. During difficult conversations, your body will tense up, which creates more stress, so loosen your body up a little before sitting down again.