5 Lessons from the World’s Longest Study of Happiness

What’s the most important thing to focus on in order to live a long and healthy life? I would have thought the answer was exercise (which may justify the somewhat obsessive way I track workouts on my Apple Watch). Then again, everyone seems to be talking about sleep lately, and I have to admit I’ve been eyeing the sleep tracking devices on the market. Or maybe it’s nutrition? Or mindfulness?

I’m not saying those are bad answers, but after talking to Marc Schulz , co-director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development, I’ve realized they’re not the right answers. Marc and his colleagues are part of the longest-running study of human flourishing ever conducted, going on for nearly 85 years, and counting. and They’ve concluded that the quality of one’s relationships is the critical element that distinguishes shorter, miserable lives from longer, happier ones.

Maybe this seems obvious to you. Of course, good relationships are important for a fulfilling life. But are you really paying attention to the quality of your relationships as much as you are to the quality of your diet, or your sleep? Have you considered that all that time you’re spending on your phone, or watching Netflix — or, frankly, listening to podcasts — could be undermining the warm human interactions that will truly enrich your daily experience? Have you looked around and noted that reports of loneliness are at an all-time high, a fact that’s considered a public health crisis, given that chronic loneliness increases your odds of dying in any given year by a full 26%?

Yeah, I was surprised, too. After my chat with Marc, I called up an old college buddy and had a two-hour catch-up with him. I started looking at my calendar and noticing that I didn’t have anything scheduled with my wife, or my siblings. It started to sink in that these relationships weren’t going to take care of themselves, and that a little effort on my part could make my life vastly richer. 

So have a listen to this conversation about The Good Life: Lessons from the World's Longest Scientific Study of Happiness by Robert Waldinger and Marc Schulz. And then, go plan a date night. Or call your mom.

Happy Listening!

— Michael

1. Relationships Keep Us Happier and Healthier (13min)

💡 To ensure your own health and happiness, cultivate warm relationships.

What makes for a good life? Over the last 85 years, researchers at Harvard have sought answers to that question. Their conclusion? It all comes down to your relationships.

2. Assess Your Social Fitness (9min)

💡 Honestly assess where you devote your time, and whether you are tending to the connections that help you thrive.

"We tend to think,” says Marc Schulz, “that once we establish friendships and intimate relationships they will take care of themselves. But like muscles, neglected relationships atrophy." In this episode, Marc shares the fitness regimen to follow if you want to keep your relationships fit and trim.

3. Challenges Are Opportunities (9min)

💡 Relationships come with challenges — and a good life is forged from precisely the things that make it hard.

Relationships may be good for your well-being, but that doesn't mean they're always easy. In this episode, Marc shares what 85 years of research have revealed about how to overcome relationship challenges.

4. Your Attention Is Your Most Precious Resource (9min)

💡 Reach out to others with one thoughtful question at a time, one moment of devoted, authentic attention at a time.

Americans spend 11 hours a day interacting with media. From the age of 40 to the age of 80, that adds up to eighteen years of waking life. What would happen if we put down our phones, turned off our TVs, and tried talking to each other?

5. It's Never Too Late to Improve Your Connections (10min)

💡 People who are successful at retiring find new sources of meaning and connections. 

In our final episode with Marc, he says you're never too old to forge new relationships.

Next Week on The Next Big Idea Daily

Next week, I’ll be sitting down with Greg McKeown to discuss his latest bestseller Effortless: Make It Easier to Do What Matters Most.

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