Ah the pleasure to disagree

Ah the pleasure of a good disagreement. Yes a good little disagreement to start an afternoon at a corner table at the end a lunch or a start of a meeting. Of course not. In our professional world sanitized and politically correct, gone the debate and the pleasure of arguments. Consensus and nothing else. “Vade retro Satanas” who would dare to say that there is a bad idea in the schedule…

And still what a pleasure, not the bad idea, but the argument, the intellectual challenge, the look at all angles of a situation. And this art of knowing how to politely disagree, of even knowing how to work at odds. That's what happens in our everyday lives, what happens in our homes, with our families or friends. From disagreement, we move to the art of compromise, and this path we may travel on each side so that ideas touch each other, enough for everything to move somewhere. Who has never debated with oneself? an A4 sheet in front of you, separated into two columns... the famous “pro” & “con”. The debate is something we know well. We often hold it within our inner dialogues. So why treat it as an unwanted immigrant as soon as it points its nose at work. A real debate is constructive. It allows us to look out of our usual boxes, to take a step back from our biases and thus make better decisions. It is even said that a team without a member able to play the devil's advocate will never really be a top team. No questioning, no challenging the status quo. No exchanges and exploration outside the boxes already built.

A few tips then to bring this disagreement back into our conversations? Remember that the point of view is not the person. People do not like my idea, people do not like me is an amalgam easily made, and to be undone as quickly as possible. Then, a disagreement at work is often far from being a mountain to climb but rather a change of process, a different project, etc. Put things into perspective, and keep in mind the true intent behind the work being done. To appreciate disagreeing is a refined art, not like a cigar after meal - Yuck the taste of cigars - but rather a subtle game of chess, an endless game of go, etc. and for this we practice to look beyond the moment, beyond the disagreement, and we seek to see what is emerging on the horizon.

To take the time to look at the horizon and step back, Swim like a fish, an easy guide to develop your self-leadership, in paperback and ebook format in one click on your screens.

And to free the art of debate in the public speaker sleeping in you, Speak Like a Fish, an easy guide to free the speaker in you, in one click coming to you