Aspiring to Radiant Empathy - A Spotlight on Dr. Kathy Marshack

My weekly Purposeful Empathy newsletter is dedicated to amplifying the voices of people from around the globe who believe the world needs more empathy - and are doing something about it. In August, I’m highlighting experts who understand the importance of emotional awareness and self-regulation within relationships, as well as the limits of empathy and how to overcome them.

No relationship is immune to arguments or disagreements, and what sets healthy and happy relationships apart is the capacity to repair. In other words, the manner in which couples resolve their conflicts. But what happens if you’re in a relationship with someone who is neurodivergent? How does that impact empathy, communication and problem-solving?

Dr. Kathy Marshack is a practicing psychologist with more than 30 years under her belt. She is also a prolific writer on empathy, what she calls Empathy Dysfunction (EMD), Autism, Asperger Syndrome and neurodivergent relationships. Significantly, she writes from personal experience as the daughter, wife and mother of neurodiverse family members.

Her three most recent books are:

• Life with a Partner or Spouse with Asperger Syndrome (ASD) (2024): Offers tools to help couples succeed in reclaiming the beauty of their relationship despite what she calls the “chaos of neurodivergence.”
• Empathy is More than Words (2022): A primer for relating to people who lack empathy due to Autism, traumatic brain injury, addiction, or illness. 
• When Empathy Fails (2018): Considered a groundbreaking book that should be a dog-eared reference for anyone living in the shadow of Empathy Dysfunction.

Across all her work, she references the Empathy Dysfunction (EMD) spectrum (ranging from 0-5). It's a tool that she developed to help people discern how much empathy they have, as well as give couples shared vocabulary to navigate the challenges associated with emotional regulation in relationships - especially neurodivergent ones. 

In a recent conversation on my podcast, Kathy describes people who fall in the EMD 5 as  “Radiant Empathy Angels.” She believes these individuals are highly sensitive and possess a higher-than-average level of emotional awareness. That's why she believes it’s their responsibility to do something with their empathy superpower. “If you’ve got this talent, use it to make the world a better place,” she says.  

You won’t catch me disagreeing with that.

Want to learn more about the important role empathy plays within relationships? Order my debut book, Purposeful Empathy: Tapping Our Hidden Superpower for Personal, Organizational, and Social Change.

Watch my Purposeful Empathy interview with Dr. Kathy Marshack on YouTube here or listen to it as a podcast on your favourite platform (Spotify or Apple Podcasts).