Authentic Leadership: Peculiarities of Caring Leaders

I have a blessed life in many ways. A wonderful family, amazing friends, and a rewarding career that's let me grow and take my own decisions.

For the last of these blessings, I will always remain indebted to several outstanding people I've had the fortune of knowing. For they were "leaders who truly cared". And like any good leader knows, the last three words in that title are indeed the most difficult parts to collect.

Sharing some memories from my interactions that left an imprint in my lives, in case any of them help leaders ponder about the memories they may be creating in the lives they touch.

1. I was quitting a job owing to a stressful manager-relationship. My brother Suhrid Devsharma who I confided right before I was going to resign, simply asked if my manager was fully secure in his role, and may be far older than me. Hearing 'no' as an answer to both, his advice was simply to not leave any problem unsolved, and to find what my manager may need to get settled. It saved my job, and even many years on, my manager then is now a friend. #CoachToBringPositivity
2. Stephanie Davis is a remarkable business head who is famous for her directness & clarity of thought. Having serviced her teams multiple times across geographies, I've certainly not escaped her critical commentary on our work. And I can't begin to explain how damning some of it has been. Yet, it never felt personal. For Steph would attack the issue and never a person, embodying the cliched quote on "determining what is right, not who." #ChallengeConstructivelyWithoutMalice
3. In my first role at Google as a business analyst, I remember feeling rather overwhelmed and had clear symptoms of imposter syndrome (without knowing the term then). My manager Sriram Chaturvedula would have noticed it, for without ever cutting me any slack, he kept encouraging me with whatever little I may have been good at, and boosted my confidence so I could present at each meeting knowing he had my back. #RecognizeStrengthsToHelpOthersFly
4. When our company, long known to be be peerless on stated principles, was hit by scandalous allegations that didn't appear to be getting addressed fairly, it left employees resentful. At this delicate moment, one of our leaders Madhuri Duggirala led a peaceful walk-out in office, enabling others to express dissent without fear of judgment. In an increasingly intolerant world, it was so refreshing to see someone in so senior be this considerate & real. #StandUpToLendCourage
5. I once approached a business head of a vertical I had just started supporting with recommendations for some radical changes, only to be greeted with strong negative feedback. To my surprise, my manager Toshendra Mathur , who I had expected to at least scold me for my immaturity, simply asked me if I needed any help to address the situation. The trust & authority worked wonders, and the business head turned into one of my best partners ever. #SupportWithTrust
6. Early on in a role where I was required to support onshore business counterparts, I often struggled to connect disparate pieces of information, say client spending patterns with consumer behaviour. Until along came a most wonderful lady Tran Hang , then an Industry Head. She mentored me with unassuming subtlety, like collaboratively analyzing sector trends, which dramatically improved how I was able to apply myself at work. #GrowOthersWithGrace
7. The Lead of a cross-functional group I used to be a member of, Shashank Sahni (he/him) , once offered me a car ride to an office event. I anticipated a work conversation, but instead found us sharing childhood experiences and stories of fun & humility. I remember Shashank mentioning how planning yearly mountaineering trips way ahead helped him enjoy work. Both the human connect and the leadership advice were so memorable! #BeAwesomeYetApproachable
8. Rashmi Om Tiwary is a firebrand nonprofit founder and a close associate through much of my development sector journey. Some of her deepest lessons came merely from observation. Whether how she is unafraid to express emotion when sharing heart-wrenching stories, or how she balanced resilience with self-care while dealing with a tragic personal loss at home. If only the world could have more leaders who don't feel they have to pretend! #LiveUnfliteredToBeRelatable
9. Our baby daughter endured a tormenting 3+ weeks in hospital once. Yet I kept worrying about yearly business planning timelines & dependencies at work, responding to emails from my phone even while reading stories to our daughter. I can't forget how my ex-manager then and a peer-function Lead Ujjwal Bhandari kept checking how we're doing and forced me to detach, even actually stepping beyond of his hectic routine to stand in for me. #LeanInToOfferAllyship
10. Meenu Handa is a senior Communications leader at Google. Yet when as a junior employee with absolutely no work connection, I once checked on some social impact narratives, she made time to listen mindfully despite her busy schedule, even making great connections for some efforts I was part of. She didn't need to do this, but clearly her intent to engage wasn't guided by corporate levels. She lends hope that this rare breed of leaders still exist. #ListenForOpportunitiesToMakeADifference
11. Dr. Raja Dutta is a colleague and friend, who stands out for probably setting the record for winning or being a finalists for Google's Best Manager Award. I knew how he committed himself to his team's work & career needs, but was still impressed with an experience where he incidentally dumped me even though I was visiting briefly. Why? I was late for our coffee catch-up, and he refused to postpone a mentoring meeting with someone he didn't even know. #TreatPeopleLikeTheyAreYourCustomers
12. Bijita Devsharma happens to be my wife, and while I do listen to her a lot (she may disagree), I am also her biggest critic. Am just so moved with how she's dealt with a difficult interpersonal situation at work, which initially broke her down enough to need therapy. For I've seen her resiliently reclaim her self esteem, choosing kindness & forgiveness over animosity, calmly reasoning that there may be challenges the other person is facing that she cannot see. #ForgiveUncondionallyWithoutAnyAssumptions

All the names and stories here are real, and like most great leaders, they'll all be too modest to ever even think of the difference they may have made in many lives through simple acts of care. Here's to the one viral phenomenon we need - that of caring leadership being contagious.