Avoid Burnout Through Better Boundaries

I want to introduce you to Kate. Kate was just about the sweetest person you could meet. Hard-working sales agent, often working long hours, and barely making ends meet. 

There were serious reasons for her lack of profitability… 

First there were the personal issues:  Kate was nice, so nice, and she let everyone take advantage of her. She had family freeloading on every level, even living in the basement rent free.  

Her adult son, girlfriend with soon-to-be-born new baby (and their dog!) also lived in this small house!  Her son didn’t have a job and neither did his girlfriend, and they spent their days occupied with video games and watching television while Kate was out struggling to make sales—and to make ends meet. 

Kate often missed dinner due to working long hours. I know this because when we were in our online sessions, she’d be scraping cold leftovers from the dinner she had made for the family earlier. As usual, she got home too late to relax after her full day and enjoy a hot meal. 

I became concerned when she was conducting our Zoom sessions in her parked car, even in winter. I asked what was going on, and that’s when the red flags started shooting up. “I have to be out here because my sister-in-law is on the internet and there is not enough bandwidth for me to handle this call with you.” 

I saw a serious problem.

Kate might as well have had the word “MAT” stamped across her forehead. She just could not stop pleasing everyone else in her life, no matter what the cost to her. Her health, cash flow, time, energy, and quality of life all suffered.   

• She did not set personal or professional boundaries.
• She avoided delegating, which would have helped her with her energy and bandwidth.
• She was NOT allowing any help.

And the biggest challenge of all:

She was ALLOWING these people to treat her this way!

Unfortunately, what’s true at home is also true at work.

• Her staff underperformed but still got paid.
• She fed leads to others, but never kept track of the status of the leads and their conversions.
• She had zero operational systems to help track, support, monitor or measure her business.
• Hundreds of dollars were going out the window for lead generation systems of which she never followed up.
• She was on full alert for reaction to the latest hiccup with no team or process in place.

These “emergencies” took her off dollar productive activities and constantly put her in a high stress, fast reactive mode. 

Her life was a series of putting out fires, grasping for any sales, and literally hemorrhaging all the critical resources:  money, time, energy, relationships and joy.  

Can you spell burnout? 

Burn out was inevitable, both physically and mentally, and clearly financially. 

Now, as a master coach, I know that her mindset was to tough it out, hope it would get better, and hope her family would someday value her love for them, but between you and me, that was never going to happen. I knew from experience that it would not end well. 

She was responsible for teaching them how to treat her. 

She had resigned herself to carrying the entire load herself, bearing the full responsibility for everything and everybody… And where was this going to end? 

Her "pedal to the metal" pace was not sustainable long term. At some point she’d either burn out in her business or burn out her body, but either way, burnout was going to happen. 

And Kate is not the only woman I know like this!

So, help me with this: 

Why is it that women will tough it out and suffer every step of the way instead of taking control of their lives and business? 

• Maybe they avoid confrontation.
• Perhaps they don’t want to release the “disease to please” or risk not being “liked.” 
• They won’t stop long enough to make the changes, fix the issues, or create the systems that can correct the course to be in charge instead of out of control. 

Little do they know that the freebie people will disappear when the beer is gone. Without loyalty and boundaries, they will only stick around ‘til the party's over. 

No matter what your business: 

• Systems are the only way to operational excellence.
• Accountability is key to measure and monitor outcomes. 
• Strategic plans set the course. 

Here’s what you can learn from this very true and real situation: 

• You can work your tail off and not make the money you want.
• You need to set firm boundaries to preserve your energy and resources.
• You must ALLOW others to help you. 

And it all starts with a simple one page strategic plan to map out what YOU want your life to look like, feel like, be like! Whether you believe it or not, you have the power, so let’s connect it ASAP!   

Get over the disease to please and start making you the STAR of your life All you have is your precious time and for the time being, hopefully, your health!

Visit: www.WomensWisdomNetwork.com/linktree for your free eBook: SmartWomen/SmarterChoices – 10 Tips to Work Smarter and Not Harder