The Be-Do-Have Paradigm Shift

You have to BE before you can DO, and do before you can HAVE - Zig Ziglar

Several years ago I participated in some leadership and development workshops with about 30 complete strangers. Although we didn't know a thing about one another going into the coursework, we all did have one thing in common; we were looking to grow.

One of the lessons/mantras that stuck with me from the training was the saying Be. Do. Have. Whenever I have been stressed in life and things seems chaotic, this has served as a reminder to simplify things. It can be really easy to allow negative thoughts or "head trash" to control your mind.

Along with negative thinking, paralysis by analysis has been one of my biggest weaknesses. As I referenced in my last article, too often I get caught up overthinking things. I try to find better ways to do things rather than just putting my head down and executing.

I'm sure that I am not the only person who has ever felt this way. I think that typically we are raised with more of a do-have-be perspective on life. We believe that if we "do" the right things then we will "have" what we desire and then we are able to "be" the person who deserves those things.

BE

Everything starts with a mindset. Your mental state of being is fundamental to everything you do and the most important part of shifting the paradigm.

Mental health is defined as a state of well-being in which every individual realizes his or her own potential, can cope with the normal stresses of life, can work productively and fruitfully, and is able to make a contribution to her or his community. (WHO)

The great philosopher, Danny Rand, in Marvel's The Iron Fist, once said that "Doubt Leads to Death." I am a big believer in this statement. I notice it at work, my business and personal life. If I have self-doubt and am not confident going into whatever it is that I am doing, I may as well not do it.

Just like you would work out and train for a marathon, you must also work out and train your mind. This is done through small daily habits and positive changes. Mental repetitions are as or more important than the real ones. It is imperative that you create a way of being in alignment with our goals.

5 Tips to Help with your State of Mind:

1. Reading- I couldn't tell you the last time I actually finished a book other than on Audible. I do notice when I am able to read before bed it seems to calm my mind. My goal for this year is to actually read 1 new book per month.
2. Exercising- This is the most important one for me. In order for me to function at my highest level, I have to work out. With a newborn, it has been really tough to make it to the gym. Our family just recently purchased a Peloton and we are really excited to be able to easily work out from home.
3. Meditating- There are a lot of helpful resources out there in relation to this one. I personally have been trained in Transcendental Meditation (TM) and notice a huge difference when I practice regularly. Headspace is a great app for beginners that I highly recommend.
4. Sleeping- I am not sure why it took me 30 years to realize how important sleep is but I finally did. I notice a huge difference in my energy levels and recovery when I am able to get at least 7 hours of sleep. For males, a natural supplement that helps is ZMA which consists of Vitamin B-6, Zinc and Magnesium.
5. Journaling- I really can't comment too much on this one but I am at least giving it a try. I have recently begun writing my goals and 5 things I am grateful for each day. Studies show that, people who vividly describe their goals are 1.2-1.4 times more likely to successfully accomplish their goals. Studies also show that sentences starting with "Studies show" are wrong most of the time...

DO

Once you have the right mindset it is time to get to work!

This part really isn't too complicated. Focus and consistently work hard at whatever you are wanting to accomplish. In my past, the main part that was missing was consistency. Oftentimes I was not in the right state of mind and would make excuses. It is easy to let the head trash win and for you to become a victim. The key is to keep working and pushing through.

David Goggins (Former Navy Seal, author and all around badass) had a great Instagram post last night that fits well with this topic:

Don’t waste so much time overthinking the process! 

In most areas of our life, we all have enough sense to know what needs to be done. The problem is that we act ignorant about it as it allows us to prolong the start of the process!

People who truly want “it” (whatever it is!) don’t nuke it, they get right to work. Until they find a better solution or process, there is a lot they can do in the meantime! 

Life isn’t as hard as we make it out to be but once you get in your head, life can be extremely challenging. Get out of your head and get to work! 

If you wake up sore on day 3 of your workout plan, it doesn’t necessarily mean you are overtrained. It may simply mean your body is sore. 

A lot of things in life can be solved by having or building self-discipline. The best way to start building self-discipline is to start saying “no” to shit that shows you don’t respect yourself. A lot of people disrespect themselves by how they treat their bodies. I am not saying to never have a cookie or two or maybe even three, what I am saying is to make sure you earn the cookie and also knowing when to cut yourself off. 

A lot of things come down to respecting yourself enough to work harder! Don’t allow your mind to be your own worst enemy!

HAVE

BE in the right state of mind, DO the work and HAVE the rewards.

Thanks for Reading! I would love some feedback if you want to comment or DM me. This is all pretty new and any help is appreciated! - DG