Motherhood and Careers: can women have it all, or is that a myth?

You cannot have it all. This is something many people have been told, especially women.

The implication of this statement is that you have to choose between your career or being a mother.

For most of my life, I have been juggling my career, studies and motherhood.

I have often been asked the question, “how did you manage to do a PhD and be a mother at the same time?”

So this #mothersday I was reflecting on my journey as a career woman and mother, and I decided to share my story.

Here is how motherhood and work life has panned out for me over the years

👉🏽I had my first child after my BSc and continued to work full-time

👉🏽I had my second child while working full-time and studying part-time

👉🏽We emigrated to a different country with my family in search of better economic opportunities (initially to pursue my PhD)

👉🏽I studied full time for my PhD while juggling family life and being a mother of two young kids

👉🏽I had my third child while working full-time as a postdoc and studying part-time

👉🏽Over the years, I have continued to work full time while balancing family life and being a mother of three children

I will be honest and say that it has not been easy.

Many times, (especially during my PhD days), it felt like I was changing shifts when I came home from the lab.

I clearly remember a few nights during my PhD days where I would come home from the lab after putting in ✅a full day’s work, and then ✅clean up, ✅make dinner, ✅help the kids with homework, ✅get kids to bed and then ✅sit on my desk and continue working on my thesis until the next morning!

Some days I got by with little or no sleep at all!

I still don’t know how I pulled those all-nighters out 😀.

But I can honestly say there is no relationship that challenges you, impacts you and yet grows you more deeply than motherhood.

It is a blessing and privilege to raise and input into the lives of these small beings, raising the next generation!

Yes, the days are long, but the years are short!

Before you know it, they are not so little anymore😀

My hope is that they are watching and learning (especially my daughter😀).

I will be honest and say that there have been opportunity costs along the way.

I have had to make some difficult decisions!

I vividly remember passing up an opportunity to go and do a postdoc overseas because it just didn’t feel right to uproot the family (again).

I may not have gotten the balance right all the time, but I am happy with the decisions I have made.

I am proud of myself for having dared greatly, and not letting motherhood stop me from pursuing my career or chasing my dreams.

I have done an incredibly good job ( both career and parenting wise) and will not wait for someone to give me a pat on the back😀

So to all the mothers who are having to juggle work and motherhood, know that it can be done.

You don’t necessarily have to choose one or the other.

You can have it all, but maybe just not at the same time!

Happy mother’s day to all the super-awesome, mothers out there who are trying to juggle motherhood and careers!

#mothersday #mothersday2022 #parenthood #gratitude #parenting #careerwoman #womeninscience #womeninstem #linkedin