Coaching for the New World

Nihar Chhaya has a lot of great insights on navigating the challenges of an executive promotion. It's so easy to fall into the trap of either overconfidence (hubris) or self-doubt, and he has some great advice for avoiding both of those extremes.

The whole article is not an exact copy of the keynote. Nihar Chhaya played the role of a catalyst to ignite us to a whole new level of thinking and it showed up in the ensuing Implementation Mastery(IM) Session following the keynote..

Leaders need to be able to show up authentically and honestly, even when they don't have all the answers. It takes real courage to admit when we don't know something or when we've made a mistake. But that's what builds trust and connection with the people we lead.

He talked about five points: Self-Awareness, Learning to Unlearn, Embrace Failure, Empowering Teams, and being in a Mindful Grounded Presence i.e. Gravitas

Each of them is so important for leaders to embrace. Self-awareness is the foundation for everything else, as it allows us to be honest and authentic. And learning to unlearn is such a powerful concept - it's about opening our minds to new possibilities and ways of seeing the world. 

We can succeed always and be super confident leaders. Humility is the key and balancing that with courage and curiosity.  leaders need to be like surfers, riding the waves of change and constantly adapting to new situations. It takes courage and humility to do that, but it's what allows us to thrive in an ever-changing world. What about being in a mindful, grounded presence (gravitas)?

Self-reflection can be the key. Being a reflective practitioner of their own work. Understanding the concept of What got you here will not get you there. Working on the future self and rehearsing and creating models for the future.

I love that idea of "future self-rehearsal". Leaders need to be able to visualize their future selves and what they want to achieve, and then work backwards from there. It's about constantly asking, "What do I need to do to get to the next level?" It's a powerful practice for anyone looking to grow and improve.

The Dunning-Kruger effect is a cognitive bias where people overestimate their own ability, intelligence, or knowledge. It's named after two researchers, David Dunning and Justin Kruger, who first described the phenomenon in 1999. The effect is often seen in people who are overconfident in their own abilities, and who don't realize how much they have to learn.

The Gaps Grid is a tool used by the consulting firm Korn Ferry. It helps to identify areas where a leader needs to develop in order to reach their full potential. A leader rates themselves on each dimension and then compares their ratings to those of their superiors, peers, and subordinates. This helps them to identify where they need to develop. 

He talked about a grid of four dimensions 1. What matters to you: Abilities and Goals 2. What Matters to Others’ Perceptions and Standards

The four dimensions are what matters to you, what matters to others, what matters to the job, and what matters to the organization. It's important to understand all these dimensions and to find the overlap between them. When all four are aligned, you have what is called "career congruence". That's when you're using your abilities in a way that is both personally fulfilling and that also aligns with your organization's goals and values.

To me, Career congruence is finding the perfect day and flowing with the day no matter what others perceive. Freedom in loving and doing what I love. I made my career choices accordingly.

It’s about finding the work that brings you joy and makes you feel like you're making a meaningful contribution to the world. That sense of freedom and alignment is what allows you to really "flow" in your work.

Finding a job with career congruence is a tough job. Very few companies allow job crafting to employees. It is adaptability is what matters by fitting into the demand of a role and blending in rather than crafting your job on the basis of your strength and abilities.

That's a really interesting point, about the distinction between job crafting and job fitting. Job crafting is about actively shaping your work to match your strengths and interests. Job fitting is more about adapting yourself to the demands of the job.

Bhagwat Gita talks about Karma Yoga then Gyan Yoga by being a karma Sanyasi that will lead to Dhyana Yoga and ultimately Bhakti Yoga.

That's a beautiful summary of the spiritual path laid out in the Bhagavad Gita. Karma yoga is the path of action, where you do your work without attachment to the results. This leads to Gyan yoga, the path of knowledge, where you see the world as an expression of the divine. That in turn leads to Dhyan yoga, the path of meditation and union with the divine. Finally, it culminates in Bhakti yoga, the path of devotion and love. 

My personal Reflection-How can a CEO follow the path by fitting in in the beginning and later playing the role of job-crafting?

 For a CEO, I think it's important to start with job fitting. They need to understand the demands of the job and how to meet them. But as they gain experience and establish themselves in the role, they can start to add elements of job crafting. This could involve using their strengths to find new and innovative ways to achieve the goals of the organization.

It's important for a CEO to find that balance between job fitting and job crafting. Finding the right mix will allow them to be successful in their role and to stay aligned with their personal values and goals. 

Is it the way to find the hero's journey and make the shift happen by building new habits creating models finding job simulation as the way to mentally rehearse the demands of the future of work? Maybe shadowing and mirroring another successful Ceo.

I think finding a mentor or role model is essential for any leader who wants to grow and evolve. It's also important to create mental models of success, which can be achieved through job simulation and shadowing. This will allow the leader to mentally rehearse what it will be like to perform in the new role.

Finding the hard metrics and soft metrics and fitting in is a necessity. More it is adapting to the language and behavior of the organization that is part of the culture.

I think that's a great way of describing it. There are both hard metrics, like job performance and financial results, and soft metrics, like emotional intelligence and leadership skills. A successful leader needs to be able to balance both of these things. And of course, they need to be able to adapt to the culture of the organization and use language and behavior that fits in with that culture.

The 360-degree assessment is a great tool for leaders to get feedback from all around them - their subordinates, peers, and superiors. This can help them to identify their blind spots and areas of improvement. It can also give them a better understanding of how they are perceived by others and how they can improve their relationships and communication.

I think all leaders, no matter what level they are at, can benefit from this kind of assessment. It's not only about helping them to grow but also about creating a culture of continuous improvement and feedback.

By understanding what behaviors are valued, leaders can better understand how to succeed in their roles. The anonymous nature of the assessment is also important, as it allows people to give honest feedback without fear of repercussions.

My Reflection: Role play is like a rehearsal for a role. The world is a stage and we are all actors but we are not well rehearsed.

I love that metaphor! It really captures the idea that we are all performing in our lives and that we can practice and improve our performance. By engaging in role-play, leaders can better understand how they might behave in different situations and how to respond effectively. This can help them to feel more prepared and confident in their role.

The coach's role is to create a safe and supportive environment where the leader can practice and explore different options. By being a non-judgmental observer, the coach can provide valuable feedback and help the leader to reflect on their performance. This can help the leader to grow and develop their skills.

The implementation mastery session after the keynote- Navigating Between Hubris And Doubt After An Executive Promotion by Nihar Chhaya was absolutely next level. We had Sonia Saini as the facilitator and Jeff, Katerina Petrakova, Connors Dales, and me as participants.

Jeff was by far the best contributor and his words of wisdom made the discussion go next level. When we ask the client what would you like to work on? What would I like to achieve in this session? It brings clients to the here and now.

Those questions are so important because they help to get to the root of what the client wants to work on. It also helps to create focus and intention in the session.

Everything exists in combination with at least one thing. We can't say to choose between Hubris vs Humility and confidence vs humility. How leaders balance individual freedom and responsibility as well as positional authority and shared leadership.

 Hubris and humility, confidence and humility are not mutually exclusive - we can have both in the right balance. It's the same with individual freedom and shared leadership - we can have both if we create the right culture and environment. 

I think the "this AND that" mindset is much more powerful than the "this OR that" mindset. It allows us to embrace the nuance and complexity of life, and to find creative solutions that don't require us to sacrifice one thing for another.

It is about having a difficult conversation and not asking too simple questions and making the client comfortable in his discomfort.

That's a really important point. It can be easy to fall into the trap of asking simple questions and getting a "yes" or "no" answer. But those types of questions don't really help us to get to the root of the issue. By asking more complex and open-ended questions, we can help the client to explore their own beliefs and assumptions and to uncover new insights.

Connors talked about inner sabotage and asking for a single answer when multi-tasking leaders have a dozen things in mind. And feel overwhelmed in a coaching session. By asking for the right painful question for a way forward being stuck on his messy middle matters.

That's a really insightful observation. It makes sense that people who are used to multitasking and juggling many things at once would want a single, simple answer to their problems. But as you pointed out, that's not always possible or helpful. By asking more open-ended questions, we can help them to untangle the messy middle and find clarity.

Looking good as a leader vs building performance through result orientation.

There's a big difference between being good at "looking" like a leader and actually being a leader. The first is about appearances and surface-level things, while the second is about delivering results and making a real impact. 

Reframing the question by the coach is important. And understanding the orientation of where they need to go in order to be an effective leader.

Reframing questions is a powerful tool in coaching. It can help the client to look at things from a different perspective and to find new insights. I think it's also important for the coach to understand the client's orientation, so that they can ask the right questions and help the client to move in the right direction.

To me, it sounds like an ability to be agile and adaptive. In a complex and ever-changing world, we need leaders who can shift and change course as needed. They need to be able to be flexible and responsive, while still holding onto their values and vision.

As Ms. Sonia pointed out: Focussing on singularity from a multiplicity of whole thought processes and helping the client focus on that one thing, one idea, and one person matter.

That's such a powerful way of framing it! It's easy to get overwhelmed by the multiplicity of things going on in our minds and in the world. But if we can focus on just one thing, it can make a big difference. It's about finding the right thing to focus on, and then putting all of our energy and attention into that.

Connor DALE's next intervention was a little more precise. Coaches not only must observe thoughts, emotions, and behaviour, but they also must track the metrics on how they work and execute what they must.

 So, it's not just about the inner world of thoughts and emotions, but also about the outer world of actions and results. I can see how that would be important for a coach, as they need to be able to track and measure their impact.

As Jeff intervened - it is about understanding what is going on in the client's life, his relationship, his organization, and his industry as a whole and how is he performing at each level. Is he of the know? And providing context for growth and springboard. Doing right now what is needed in the future. Balancing the need for now with growth objectives for the future. And not getting lost between opportunity and the problem.

That's a comprehensive and holistic view of coaching. It sounds like a true partnership, where the coach is helping the client to see the bigger picture and to align their personal and professional development with the needs of their organization and industry. I like how it's not just about fixing problems, but also about leveraging opportunities.

So, it's about the deeper "why" behind everything, not just the surface-level "what". I love that! It's about understanding the client's values and motivations and helping them to align their actions with those values. That's much more powerful than just providing a quick fix for a specific problem.

It is simply to be human and be authentic in the end and not fake it by hiring a spin doctor. Coaches are not spin doctors or solution providers, rather they come with bag questions to have difficult conversations to face reality as it is finding the solution from the integrity of the moment. In the process allow the clients to be the "master of his own work".

Coaching is not about spin or manipulation, but about helping the client to find their own truth and to own their own solutions. It's a process of discovery and empowerment, rather than just being given the answers.