Come and Get This Pollen

Reflections on busyness, creative struggles, community support, honesty, and the importance of following one's passion despite challenges and self-doubt.

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Whoa, it’s been a minute.

I’ve missed you all. Hoping the feeling is mutual.

The truth is, I’ve been busy.

I don’t talk about it much.

But aside from Ground Control.

And writing killer jams.

I run a few companies, try to be a good dad and husband, and also attempt to not drown in my own paralyzing self-analysis.

It takes time.

Also, I went to Maine and spent some time swimming in 60° water, paddle boarding, reading the latest, and last, Cormac McCarthy book and losing my goddam mind to Sabrina Carpenter’s “Espresso.”

For real, that’s the jam of the summer.

If you haven’t heard it I highly recommend turning the lights off in your kitchen, putting it on repeat, and dancing your face off.

Thank me later.

But here’s the rub.

I also spent the last few weeks thinking Way Too Much about falling off here.

Got in my head. Shit got dark. And I didn’t know how to restart.

I had all the things I wanted to say, but ughhh.

I was so freaking disappointed in me.

What I find funny is I know exactly what I’d say to someone going through the same thing.

Something to the effect of “just get back on the horse, bucko.”

And thankfully, in close conversations, I’m not often afraid of being honest.

So I found myself chatting a few days ago with an acquaintance and friend.

And I laid it all out there.

Not realizing they read Ground Control.

Just being honest.

And a bit vulnerable.

And you know what I heard?

Something to the effect of “just get back on the horse, bucko.”

And what wisdom and grace that provided.

What’s the moral? I don’t know.

But sometimes we just can’t follow our own advice even when we know it’s what we should do.

Sometimes despite our best efforts and intentions we need someone else to flick the switch on the flashlight.

I talk a lot about community.

Mostly the big aspirational side of the IDEA of community.

But today I’m talking about community in its practical application.

Community at work.

When I write, I put my heart in it.

I do it because I couldn’t look myself in the eye otherwise.

I know there are a lot of newsletters. There are a lot of people writing to command the attention graph.

And I’d be lying if I said otherwise for myself as well.

But my end goal is so ambitious it’s blinding.

Because mostly I don’t know what the fuck it is.

But I do know that this pursuit feels so good.

I do know that way-finding the center of me is worth it.

And I deeply believe that the way I feel isn’t unique.

That the way I feel is the way a lot of people feel.

And that there’s not much more honorable a pursuit than serving that hunch.

Thank you all for sticking around.

See you soon.

This is Ground Control.

- Patrick

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