Conversations with Lou Tice - The Power of Beliefs in Development

Lou Tice was an innovative, important, and influential educator and coach. He firmly believed that we become what we think about most of the time, and his teachings centered around using our thoughts to shape a better reality for ourselves.

In this third imagined conversation with Lou, Coach Phil explores the role of beliefs in self-development and how tools as simple and practical as strategic self-talk can powerfully change ourselves for the better.

Coach Phil: Lou, last we talked, we touched on the power of beliefs in the medical field. Could we shift focus a bit? I'd like to understand how beliefs affect children's development.

Lou Tice: Certainly, Phil. Beliefs are foundational in a child's development. To give them a sense of power and importance, it's crucial we involve them in events that open their worldview. Take my granddaughter Alex to a big seminar at the Fifth Avenue theater, for example, demonstrating to her that she's part of something substantial.

Coach Phil: And how early do you think these beliefs start shaping their reality?

Lou Tice: From the very outset, Phil. I've seen this with my five-month-old granddaughter, Tiffany. When she smiles at seeing her grandmother, it's a belief that's contagious. Others start believing she recognizes and smiles intentionally, reinforcing a collective belief in her awareness and connectivity.

Coach Phil: This makes me wonder about the formation of these beliefs. How fundamental is the language we use around and with our children?

Lou Tice: Language, Phil, is more than just a tool for communication – it's a cornerstone of belief formation. Take Tiffany; before she even speaks, she's assimilating reality through feelings and images. Once language is added, it enhances her mental scripts, shaping her beliefs which are reinforced by our reactions and feedback.

Coach Phil: That brings to mind self-talk and its profound impact. How does it play into all of this?

Lou Tice: Stanford research sheds light on this; our internal scripts, our self-talk, is a significant precursor to future performance. Each time we replay events mentally and label our mistakes as “stupid,” we risk cementing negative self-beliefs. That's why I stress positive affirmations, even if they're not vocalized.

Coach Phil: How can we become more aware and take control of these internal dialogues?

Lou Tice: Phil, the first step is to catch ourselves in the act. Play a game of “no put-downs” for 24 hours. This will not only challenge us to control negative self-talk but also helps us to fortify positive beliefs and increase our awareness of how we're directing our own narratives through self-image.

Coach Phil: So it's about changing the script running in the background of our minds?

Lou Tice: Exactly. If you hear yourself saying “I can't,” flip that on its head. Replace it with “That's not like me” whenever negative self-talk arises. This simple phrase challenges and reshapes the existing self-image.

Coach Phil: I've seen this in coaching. I've focused on what a player shouldn't do, which only taught them to perform poorly. From studying your teaching, using a reflective thinking journal, I found out that I should've encouraged the right actions instead. Helping them to imprint the ideal outcomes so that under pressure they perform at their new normal, just like themselves. There’s evidence that whether it was an athlete I was coaching, a seller, entrepreneur, or vice president the process worked.

Lou Tice: That's a profound realization, Phil. Positive reinforcement works wonders, especially compared to focusing on what to avoid. You're teaching, whether consciously or not, what to emulate. By reinforcing what we aspire to be, we influence our actions in powerful ways.

Coach Phil: Lou, your insights are transformative. The idea that we can actively shape our reality through beliefs and self-talk is empowering. I'm eager to implement these strategies, both personally and in coaching my business with clients. Thank you, Lou.

Lou Tice: You're doing great work, Phil. Remember, the seeds of belief we plant – whether in ourselves or in children – will grow into the gardens of tomorrow's reality. Keep nurturing positive beliefs and watch the potential bloom. There's no ljoy than witnessing the transformation that comes from a positive self-image and empowering self-talk.-courtesy Coach PhiluoLLou Tice was an educator and coach. Along with his wife Diane Tice, they co-founded the Pacific Institute, an organization dedicated to performance improvement and professional development. His work often revolved around the concepts of self-esteem, goal-setting, and leadership.

About Lou Tice

This is a series of articles around what I feel Lou would share with me today if he were still with us. His impact on the world and me was wonderful! His legacy lives on through the many people The Pacific Institute impacted, including Businesses and sports Teams, reducing the numbers on welfare systems, reducing recidivism, Apartheid in South Africa, and transitioning from a communist regime.

Lou Tice firmly believed that we become what we think about most of the time, and his teachings centered around using our thoughts to shape a better reality for ourselves.