Cultivating the ‘C’ word.

As a leader, have you ever thought: “We need MORE conflict on our team”?

I did. Learn why, and what happened when we did.

Why did I want more conflict on my team?

I know what you’re thinking. I spend my life trying to reduce and run away from conflict, why would I want to amp it up??

The truth is, a nice culture, can be too… nice.

This leads to:

• Difficult feedback not being delivered.
• Challenges not faced.
• Lack of accountability and ownership to the rest of the team.

ALL important for a culture that consistently performs to the highest level.

At More Happi we’re aiming for kind, generous and high-performing.

Last week the More Happi team took part in a transformational group coaching session with expert leadership coach and facilitator Anise Frost . We discussed the many pros and cons - and what makes conflict successful, healthy and yes (!) even FUN.

First up, we explored WHY we avoid conflict.

• Feels personal Can upset the other person.
• Feels like a power imbalance.
• Not enough time or know how to do it well.
• Concern that it will go wrong.

Then we talked about how to bring a ‘healthy’ conflict into the day-to-day.

Anise introduced us to her simple 5-step conflict resolution process (👇) and has generously granted me the power to share it with you too.

It goes like this.

Step 1: Define the Issue

• Express what you think the conflict is about. Give it from your perspective.

Step 2: Listen Actively

• With full attention
• Acknowledge the other's feelings about the conflict
• Seek to understand their point of view
• Empathy

Step 3: Brainstorm Solutions (It’s both of you against the problem)

• Be creative and open-minded
• Strive for win/win solutions
• Consider each suggestion without judgement
• Explore each one before deciding the best course of action

Step 4: Negotiate and Compromise

• Discuss proposed solutions
• Try to find a middle ground
• Find a mutually acceptable agreement

Step 5: Agree on a Resolution and Follow-Up

• Ensure both parties are in agreement
• Be clear about roles moving on
• Document resolution and tasks
• Establish a follow-up timeline

Coach lab questions for your fortnight:

• What impact is NOT having difficult conversations having on the success of your business/team?
• How have you successfully managed conflict in the past? (What did you learn?)
• What are you avoiding saying that needs to be said?
• How could you bring more healthy conflict into your processes?

A little bit about me (your guide)

For those of you I haven't met yet, I'm Ashleigh, founder of More Happi :) Nice to meet you! 👋

I’ve worked across 9 industry start-up sectors, ranging from fashion trend forecasting, to wool, tampons, sustainable lightbulbs and more.

I trained to be a coach in 2020, after over 20 years in Product, Marketing and Leadership roles.

I noticed something that irked me.

Coaching is transformational for people’s life and career.

But the coaching industry was broken. 😟

Due to high costs, only the usual suspects at the top of organisations were able to benefit from the superpowers that professional coaching brings — fuelling a vicious circle of privilege that sustains the status quo and leaves everyone else behind.

It wasn’t fair. So I’m fixing it. And so far, thousands have benefitted.

Interested in learning more about the most accessible coaching service ever created? Discover more here.