Disagreements are fine, disrespect is not

We all agree that everyone has the right to disagree and none must construe this as disrespectful. If one expects a relationship to be lasting, the pre-requisite is to listen to disagreements also and never force one’s views on others rigidly. But one must learn to express disagreements in a pleasant manner and not scream or shout. If one can highlight the reasons for disagreeing, it is most welcome. What is disrespectful is to assume that if you do disagree with someone they will be horribly upset and terrible things will follow.

What is disrespectful is to assume that someone is so immature that they could not tolerate any disagreement. Genuine people are going to disagree. That is the nature of people. It is the manner and means by which we disagree in which one can find disrespect. As my own mother said, It is okay to disagree agreeably and respectfully. Name calling, vengeance, etc. are disrespectful. We should disagree if someone thinks they are right about something and they are not.

Disagreement often leads to argument and argument is likely to involve some at least small disrespect. That’s because issues are the focus rather than how you are treating each other as you promote and trash them. People can closely identify with their views and then try to defend themselves personally against what they see as personal attacks on their views. And so we have unsolicited sparring. Sparring is an attempt to knock down the other person. Not respectful even when people agree to box.

When someone disrespects you, doesn't mean you should also disrespect them. If you do the same, there is no difference between you and them. If life throws you in a situation where someone disrespects you, just sort it out and walk away without investing time and brain in it. If you cannot walk away because of situation constraints, just ignore. Your peace of mind is more important than anything else. You don't deal with such a person. You distance yourself from such a person.

Life is short. Why should you have to put up with that crap? There are billions of perfectly reasonable, personable, conscientious and humble people out there. Get closer to them and leave this one alone. Disagreements are issue based and should be accepted in good spirit as a debate only and it is not being personal and disrespect someone because of their difference of opinion on certain topics.

When narcissistic side of a person show their true face, the defame, discard and betrayal can turn your life upside down. People learn to trust and become friends largely due to the word respect and how we honor and respect each other’s words, beliefs and feelings. Without this respect the abuser will not be genuine to you. For this reason you don’t have to treat them in the same manner as you once did. Energies are returned and reciprocated.

And by choosing a more loving approach, you can forgive them so you don’t need to carry the weight of their emotional distress and negative intentions. When you become the forgiver and the lover, you will become the winner of your reality. You control the energies you carry via mental and emotional. Friendships or relationships may end, but you know deep down you love and care for them. This doesn’t have to end because this is who you are a lover of humanity. Cheers!