Does attitude REALLY matter?

When my late wife, Sheri, and I were first married, her father took me aside to give me advice I've never forgotten: "Think big, and you will be."

My great friend, Dr. Tony Alessandra, has related that when he was working on his Ph.D. at Georgia State University, his professor was Dr. David Schwartz -- known for the popular book, "The Magic of Thinking Big."

And the late, great Zig Ziglar wrote and constantly spoke on the importance of how we think, telling his audiences and readers that we all need a "check-up from the neck up."

It begs two questions:

1. Does how we think actually impact our results?
2. And, if our thinking does make a difference, how can we change it to improve our attitude and subsequently our outcomes?

Most motivational psychologists suggest the answer to the first question is a resounding "Yes!" Just as exercise strengthens our physical muscles, so too do our thoughts shape and mold our minds. Our attitudes are a direct result of our predominant thoughts.

For example, the Mayo Clinic lists these personal results from a positive approach:

• Increased life span
• Lower rates of depression
• Lower levels of distress and pain
• Greater resistance to illnesses
• Better psychological and physical well-being
• Better cardiovascular health and reduced risk of death from cardiovascular disease and stroke
• Reduced risk of death from cancer
• Reduced risk of death from respiratory conditions
• Reduced risk of death from infections
• Better coping skills during hardships and times of stress

When it comes to business, Harvard says, "Research shows that when people work with a positive mindset, performance on nearly every level—productivity, creativity, engagement—improves."

Those are powerful results! To achieve them for yourself, start by asking:

• What attitude do you want to have?
• What kind of person do you want to be?
• And remember: the attitude we display toward others is really just a reflection of the attitude we have toward ourselves.

It all starts with self-acceptance: it's liking yourself just the way you are -- warts and all. From that foundation, everything else follows. If you don't like yourself very much, it will be difficult to like others.

If you don't think very highly of yourself, it will be tough to think highly of others. It's hard to have a positive attitude when you're trying to cover up a negative self-image.

Three steps to improving your self-concept are:

1. Choose your attitude. We need to start teaching students (and it's never too late to learn) that attitude is one of the few aspects of life over which we have total control. If you decide to have a bad attitude, you can make yourself and everyone around you miserable with your negativity. If your choice is on the other end of the spectrum, you can have a stellar approach to what life puts in your path. I promise that you know someone who has more difficulties than you who also has a better attitude than the one you currently possess. Conversely, I'll bet you also know someone who has it better than your current situation who is still miserable and unappreciative. Attitude is a matter of personal choice.
2. Decide what kind of person you want to be. For example, my wife Tammy decided she wanted to be a more involved person in our community -- and she wanted to give more to others because of her gratitude for our blessings. After making those decisions, she has become highly involved with a program called Cup of Hope that helps feed and inspire homeless men and women here in Las Vegas. Many people who are experiencing difficulties have been helped through her volunteering -- and Tammy has grown into more of the person she desires to be by first deciding exactly what she wanted.
3. Determine the price you're willing to pay to achieve it. It's long been called the "Coke bottle philosophy of life: No deposit. No return." I heard a speaker once say the only time you ever get handed millions for nothing is if you win the lottery. I had to disagree -- even to win the lottery, you have to go to the store and spend the money to purchase a ticket. The question you must ask yourself is what price are you willing to pay to achieve what you want? I can say that I want to write a book -- but if I fail to put the seat of my pants in the seat of a chair and write...instead of watching television or going to a ball game...then it's all just empty talk!

"Our attitude toward life determines life's attitude towards us," wrote the legendary Earl Nightingale.

My friend Brian Tracy has said, "You cannot control what happens to you, but you can control your attitude toward what happens to you, and in that, you will be mastering change rather than allowing it to master you."

The second question -- how do we change our thinking? -- is just as important as the first. Several speaker pals of mine use a critical quote: "In software programming, it's popular to say GIGO: garbage in, garbage out. However, when it comes to how we think and how our minds work it's GIGS: garbage in, garbage stays."

Just as there are exercise programs to get our physical bodies in shape, so too are there mental exercises we can perform to "strengthen our minds." Here are some suggestions:

• Read books and articles that inspire you and reinforce positive thinking. (Some of my favorites are the previously mentioned "The Magic of Thinking Big" by David Schwartz; "The Power of Positive Thinking" by Norman Vincent Peale, and "Atomic Habits" by James Clear.)
• Find a mentor or coach who can help you stay focused on your goals and thinking positive thoughts.
• Hang around people who are positive and upbeat. I'm always amazed at how my attitude improves when I'm around people like that!
• Practice gratitude. Every day, make it a point to think of five things you're grateful for in your life. You'll be surprised at how this simple exercise can change your attitude for the better.
• Make it a habit to think and speak words of encouragement to yourself throughout the day. Stop beating yourself up over every minor issue that doesn't turn out perfectly.
• Give yourself regular "attitude checkups." At the end of each day, ask yourself how you did in terms of staying positive and keeping a good attitude. If you slip up, don't beat yourself up -- just resolve to do better tomorrow.

Just as it's important to take care of our physical health, so too is it vital to regularly monitor our mental and emotional well-being.

When we pay attention to our thoughts and attitude, we will ensure we're thinking positive thoughts that will lead to productive actions and results.

Resolve to give yourself a daily "check-up from the neck up" -- and watch your life become more distinctive!