Embracing solo dining

During a meal out with my daughter at Restaurant Clairefontaine in Luxembourg, I realised that the solo dining businessman on the next table was very discreetly conducting a conference call with his earphones in, using a hushed voice, and his mobile phone propped up on the bread basket.

I’ve a phobia against irresponsible and intrusive phone usage in public spaces, but this was a masterclass in how to handle devices with no impact on anybody else. We’d exchanged a bit of a banter during the meal, and after his work call, he seamlessly resumed his cheese course and ordered another glass of the surprisingly good locally produced wine. Beyond our bit of chat, he seemed very comfortable dining on his own. He was not going to miss out on the opportunity of enjoying a meal out in a smart restaurant just because he was travelling alone on business.

He certainly earned my respect, as I’ve always been a massively reluctant solo diner. The rather too self-conscious aspect of my character has me feeling the eyes of the whole restaurant are bearing down on me. The perception of pitying the friendless guy who can’t find anybody to dine out with has been sufficient to put me off such ventures. I do wish I was more confident like our friend in Luxembourg – particularly when travelling away on business.

Apparently, increasing numbers of people are joining him and dining alone, according to research from OpenTable, which found that over the last two years, solo-dining reservations had risen by as sizeable 14% in the UK and even more so in the US, where the increase is a hefty 29%. In Japan, it’s risen 23% versus the 18% recorded six years ago. The ageing population in Japan and the rise of single households has led to solo dining and drinking becoming part of the country’s culture and the phenomenon has its own name – ohitorisama. 

Helping cement this scenario are the ramen brands that have been popping up, which involve stalls separating diners and almost giving everyone their own cubicle. This all seems a bit extreme, but they are proving popular as one particular brand. The ramen specialist Ichiran is opening locations around the world. What is a more palatable Japanese export are the sushi bar-type concepts that have diners seated at the counter facing towards the chefs and with their backs to the dining room.

Bar counter seating in restaurants was a relatively rare sighting in the UK, but the rise of the open kitchen has now assigned a premium to these seats in many establishments. They are prime territory for solo diners, and the explosion in the number of establishments offering such seating is no doubt contributing to the rise in people eating alone. 

This will hopefully bring about an embrace of solo dining and end the days of demonising the activity. Jason Atherton is helping the cause with his recent overhaul of Pollen Street Social, which has been replaced by Mary’s. It is named after a regular solo dining customer, who would pitch up unannounced and sit in the same seat at the bar counter to enjoy a small steak and a martini. When it switched to a formal tasting menu-only restaurant, she never returned. The reworking of the Michelin star venue is a reflection of this more casual approach to dining that will welcome single customers such as Mary.

Further acknowledgment of the trend could be seen with the backlash faced by Alex Dilling at the Café Royal restaurant, when it was widely reported that he was charging solo diners double the regular amount for his tasting menu as they were taking a table for two and causing him to lose money at his modest 11-table dining room. He subsequently defended himself by claiming he had been misreported and was, in contrast, welcoming of solo diners.

For a reluctant dine-alone like me, the Café Royal might be a step too far to dip my toe into the soloist waters, but as the trend is increasingly taking hold and virtually every new restaurant opening now includes a quota of seats at the bar counter, I’m now sorely tempted to give it a go – especially when travelling away on business.

After all, I’m probably the country’s biggest advocate of bar stools. I’m never more comfortable than when sat at the bar, having a beer or two alone, wherever that might be in the world. Occasionally chatting to the servers and to fellow drinkers perched at the bar makes for a wonderful experience, in my opinion.

For the chefs and restaurant serving staff out there who spot the self-conscious diner at the counter seating looking like he wants to be anywhere else, then please just hand him a menu, tell him nobody is watching and remind him that everybody is doing it nowadays.

Glynn Davis, editor of Retail Insider 

This piece was originally published on Propel Info where Glynn Davis writes a regular Friday opinion piece. He would like to thank Propel for allowing the reproduction of this column.