Enablement: Opening Closed Minds

We struggle with enabling and supporting people who refuse to get on board with new ideas... But when we look around, most of those cross-armed, furrowed-brow refusers are still working with us, aren't they? 😅

So, it makes sense that we need to get good at opening minds to new ways of working, especially when we're impacted by their performance.

To understand how to open minds, we first have to understand why they close in the first place.

Here's why minds close:

Change - positive or negative - immediately triggers FEAR in our minds, and fear closes us off to the change.

We immediately start to assess the level of threat that this change, new idea, or request entails, and go through this private risk assessment while doing our best to remain calm.

What are we so threatened by? Pain. Change immediately threatens us with pain.

This is a symptom of being human - a survival mechanism that has kept us alive. As cave dwellers, we'd periodically take a look outside to check for any change in the environment, because change usually meant something ugly was about happen that would result in a lot of pain.

Fair enough.

But while we don't spend as much time in caves anymore, we do spend a lot of time sitting in cave-like offices (they're cool, airy, sometimes dark). And we're very much on the look out for anything that could threaten pain through changing the status quo.

So, as leaders (of teams or meetings), we have to remember to TALK ABOUT FEAR at every turn, re-route, or change we're suggesting... No matter how excellent or valuable the change is!

Here is the pain framework to TALK THROUGH every time you propose something new.

1. pain of loss;
2. pain of process; and
3. pain of outcome.

Your co-workers will be thinking through these pains automatically and immediately, even while you're still mid-sentence. They've stopped listening and are on high alert for threats that would cause them pain.

Let's look at each pain a little more closely:

➡️ Pain of loss is the fear that 'if I accept the change, I would lose something important to me' - like guaranteed income, client relationships, internal allies, personal relationships, good experiences, safety of repetition etc.

➡️ Pain of process is the fear that 'if I accept the change, I would probably fail at it because I'm already so busy as it is... I don't have the time, resources, or ability to make it happen and I don't want to admit that I might not be good enough... I would be shamed and rejected by my peers and left to fend for myself outside of the cave - no thanks, I'll continue as I am and ignore all emails that suggest otherwise'.

➡️ Pain of outcome is the fear that 'if I accept the change, not only do I risk losing something or someone important to me, I'd have to go through the pain of changing my habits, routines, and processes, AND THEN when I get to the other side, the grass might not be any greener... Then what?! I'd have wasted my time! No thanks, too risky and painful and not for me. I'll wait till someone I relate to achieves this new ask, or you threaten to fire me (which could take a lovely long time doing what I've always done).'

Whether we're communicating with team members, prospects, or clients, we've absolutely got to address the elephant in the room - which we can do by talking through the PAIN FRAMEWORK:

• the pain of them losing something important to them;
• the pain of changing their processes; and
• the pain of the outcome being risky.

You will have to pre-game your approach and be ready to repeat what you say using different words, and you must also be ready to take questions and receive some harsh criticism - which initially - is a good sign because it demonstrates the willingness to think through the potential pains with you as their guide.

Keep calm and rational while talking through the fear framework, while getting them excited about the possibilities that are opening up for them. Don't make the mistake of ignoring fear and assuming everyone is managing their doubts.

If you're in a situation where people are coming up with all sorts of objections or excuses to get on board, then it's probably because the INTERNAL FEAR FACTOR is still too high.

The benefits you keep banging on about aren't being heard because the voice of fear is drowning you out. Get them talking, listen to what they're saying, and then lean in a little more closely - I can guarantee that their closed mind is fear-related.

Remember the FEAR FRAMEWORK and talk it through so that you re-open minds, get people excited again, and get the company growing.

You've got this.

x Tanya