Episode 117: Melissa Marquis, MS, RN & Her Book, Invisible: A Nurse-Turned-Patient’s Resource to Living Well with Autoimmune Disease

Episode 117: Melissa Marquis, MS, RN & Her Book, Invisible: A Nurse-Turned-Patient’s Resource to Living Well with Autoimmune Disease

In her book, Melissa is taking everything she's learned in both nursing and emergency management, as well as her own challenging and frustrating medical journey, to empower others to guard their own health by advocating for it.

This is another book where the author is writing the book they wish was available to them as they were meeting their own challenges. Melissa, as that author, is gracious enough to help others do just that by informing prompting them to listen to themselves and their bodies.

We tend to be too passive in life, putting too much trust in others -- even when we feel something is off. Even though Melissa's book is written from her experience with Scleroderma, the lessons in her book are transferrable to other areas of life and health.

This episode is about awareness, self-care, self-advocacy, mental health, and so much more.

I met Melissa in high school, and it's incredible to hear about the journey she's taken since then, mindfully controlling what she can and proactively living with what she can't. She's always had a care-giving nature, as anyone who knew her in high school could attest to.

But it's different, like she shares, when you're on the other side, needing care yourself. No matter how educated or experienced we are, life will find a way to drop us down a peg. We can't predict when that will happen; we can only try to be as prepared as possible to face it, albeit with doses of vulnerability mixed in with that resilience.

CONVERSATION HIGHLIGHTS

• Seeing life and work from different angle -- from being the provider to needing the provisions.
• Dealing with the predictably unpredictable.
• Understanding triggers and taking actions for readiness.
• Constantly wondering what shoe is going to drop next?
• Knowing what's coming but not really preparing yourself.
• Melissa's Super Powers: (1) Being a Good Listener & (2) Identifying What's Needed and Stepping In.
• Leadership and doing the hard things.
• The leadership quality that's instilled in you as a child.
• You DO have something to say!
• How to be a good self-advocate.
• The importance of faith and God in Melissa's life and journey.
• At the end of the day, all we have is ourself.
• "Your disease is not who you are at your core as a person."
• How our need for therapy evolves with our life's experiences.
• Knowing what the right mix of self-care looks like for you.
• "...adverse childhood events really do influence more than just your behaviors, your thoughts and your attitudes, but it actually influences your physical health"
• The scariest thing to face in life.
• How the manifestation of resilience can differ from person to person.

The MAIN QUESTION underlying my conversation with Melissa is, If you were to write a book, what would you write about and share with others of your own life and lessons?

MENTIONED OR APPLICABLE BOOKS

• The Bible
• The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel van der Kolk M.D.

MENTIONED OR APPLICABLE PAST EPISODES

• Episode 90: Autumn Carolynn & Her Book, Traveling in Wonder: A Travel Photographer's Tales of Wanderlust
• Episode 76: Cindy Gersch & Manifest: 7 Steps to Living Your Best Life by Roxie Nafousi
• Episode 67: Holly Jackson & Her Book, Inspiration Contagion: Health Secrets For Raving Success

ABOUT MELISSA

Melissa Marquis is a nurse, author and emergency management specialist. She has decades of experience in both the nursing and emergency management/public health fields. Melissa also wears the “hat” of patient. Beginning in 2008, she began noticing seemingly random symptoms, out of character for her. She quickly began her quest for answers. Utilizing her medical experience and connections, she sought care with numerous specialists. For a number of years, her status was relatively unchanged. Symptoms persisted and pain levels increased; frustration started to build at the lack of any diagnosis or answers to why and what was happening. After almost 13 years, 5 rheumatologists, and numerous tests and procedures later- it was confirmed her symptoms were largely related to systemic sclerosis (scleroderma). Since then, Melissa has been a passionate advocate for patients within the autoimmune disease community, specifically scleroderma. After recognizing the lack of information available for patients who undergo years of visits and tests with limited or no answers, Melissa curated a resource book to share her experiences and lessons learned in navigating this challenging spectrum of illnesses. In her debut as an author, Melissa presents Invisible: A Nurse-Turned-Patient’s Resource to Living Well with Autoimmune Disease which provides a broad-brush stroke of education about, and living with, autoimmune disease. She wisely incorporates topics such as symptoms, testing, doctor’s visits, and then shifts into her experiences as the patient. Melissa again, provides a wide range of information on topics such as understanding and managing flares, navigating insurance denials and disability applications, mental health impacts of chronic illness, and the role and value of self-advocacy, among others.

FIND MELISSA

• Website: westhartford.org/living_here/town_departments/health_district/index.php
• LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/melissamarquis
• Buy Invisible

YOUTUBE CHAPTERS

• 00:57 - Introduction & Bio
• 03:39 - How did your path into your career begin, and what did it look like up until now?
• 08:44 - Who are you today? Can you provide more information about your work?
• 11:26 - How Melissa prioritizes self-care when it comes to all her work vs. her living with scleroderma.
• 15:46 - Where Melissa was in her career and life when she began noticing symptoms.
• 25:18 - The origins of who Melissa is as a caregiver in life.
• 27:15 - How does the work you're doing today reconcile to who you were as a child?
• 28:27 - What's your super power?
• 29:29 - What does leadership mean to you?
• 31:51 - Can you introduce us to the book we’re discussing?
• 46:28 - Can you provide a general overview of the book?
• 01:07:16 - How have you evolved as a result of writing this book?
• 01:11:02 - What’s next for your writing?
• 01:12:47- What book has inspired you?
• 01:14:23 - What are you up to these days? (A way for guests to share and market their projects and work.)

About The Book Leads

On The Book Leads podcast, I speak to specialists and experts across various industries and from varied backgrounds to learn about the book that made an impact and left an impression on their work, life, and leadership. In the course of my conversation I also learn about my guest's background, experience, and work they're carrying out today. 

This series has become my Masterclass In Humanity. I'd love for you to join me and see what you take away from these conversations.

Learn more about The Book Leads and listen to past episodes:

• Watch on YouTube
• Listen on Spotify
• Listen on Apple Podcasts
• Read About The Book Leads – Blog Post

About Me

I'm a Leadership Performance Coach and Consultant at Coach It Out, LLC (www.coachitout.com). In addition to coaching, and as you can see above, I enjoy writing, podcasting, and speaking about leadership. Specifically, I work with clients to realize what they're all about when it comes to (1) new positions they've been hired or promoted into; and (2) rediscovering what they want out of their leadership, development, and career.

My signature talks include Design Your Leadership! Nine Ways to Sharpen Your Leadership Brand In The Everyday, and Platinum Networking: Designing A Unique Experience For Others In A World Of Disconnection.

Please subscribe to my newsletter Last Week's Leadership Lessons, if you haven't already!

Reach out to me at johnmjaramillo@coachitout.com.