An Equation for Happiness

The relationship between happiness and productivity is a tricky one. Lots of people think that if they can juuuust get a bit more productive, if they can juuuust get to that next career goal, if they can juuuust win that award, then happiness will be just around the corner.

But here’s the thing: Productivity doesn’t bring happiness. Happiness brings productivity.

If you want progress in your life, start by working on your happiness. The worst thing you can do is to keep building more busyness on top of more busyness, trying to fill that feeling of internal emptiness in the hope that one day, you'll miraculously wake up happy.

But how can we work on our happiness? There are lots of useful perspectives on this. I remember reading ‘The Happiness Advantage’ by Shawn Achor , which is a great book that summarises the science. One of the key takeaways for me was that research has found that most things that make us unhappy are things that we can change if we shift our mindset, but that also, there are two exceptions – living next to a lot of noise and doing a long (30 minutes+) commute to and from work. When I read that book, I was living in East London, next to a main road and a hospital. The sirens had driven me crazy for years. I moved to a quiet part of Brighton soon afterwards, and it was only a year or so later that I realised how much the noise had affected me.

Working proactively on happiness and making space in our lives for the things that fuel happiness and joy is never something we should feel guilty about or apologise for. Even if this means taking time away from work activities, the ensuing happiness will fuel future productivity at far higher levels anyway.

I’ve often had periods where I’ve really suffered from depression, and this past year has been no exception. There are times when I have to work quite hard on my happiness if I want to keep myself on the right track. I don’t do anything too intensive or radical; it’s just about working consistently on the basics – eating well (check out How to Have the Energy for more about how I do this), sleeping properly, doing some form of exercise every day, embracing zero-alcohol beer (it’s got good!), and doing some kind of mindfulness practice every day. If I miss a day’s exercise or mindfulness, I practice self-kindness rather than beating myself up about it – ultimately, it’s the consistency over time that matters. Imperfection and guilt are just bad takes if you’re generally doing all the things that the science shows will bring happiness.

But last week, my friend told me about an equation for happiness that really got me thinking. Because as well as ‘doing all the right things’, we also have to ‘think all the right things’, and dare I say, be all the right things as well.

So here’s the equation for happiness:

Happiness = reality – expectations

It’s a simple equation, but one that suggests that a few key mindsets will actually make us happy:

1. Gratitude and seeing the ‘glass as half full’ will always tip the scale in the right direction. Instagram culture that leads us to comparison and jealousy will only ever make us miserable.
2. Being clearer on what are our ‘wants’ versus our ‘needs’ really helps. Trying not to move the goalposts on ourselves helps, too.
3. Lowering our expectations, picking our battles and focusing our energies on the things we can control versus the things we can’t all help to lower stress. It’s all about letting go.

So, as the world resumes its ‘busyness’, chasing rainbows and weeks of overdrive, I invite you to take a step back from the chaos. Think about this equation, and ask yourself:

• What should I feel more grateful for?
• Where can I lower my expectations?
• What could I let go of?

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