Everyone Should Be Heard

Yesterday, during an unplanned phone interview, an unusual but telling scenario unfolded. As the recruiter posed their first question, I found myself speaking - a ceaseless monologue that filled the airwaves. An unexpected call, a flood of information poured forth in an effort to encapsulate my ever-evolving experience. My intentions were good, but it was a lost opportunity to engage in a conversation.

This unplanned verbosity highlighted an essential, yet often neglected, aspect of communication – active listening. The phrase tends to seem oxymoronic to many, often associated with silence and passivity. However, active listening, in reality, is far from passive. It is a skill, an art, an investment of time and attention in the person speaking to us.

As I concluded the call, I returned to finish an article I had been writing – a piece that had been inspired by an Mondays article highlighting my intention to brighten up someone else's day. By committing a random act of kindness. It contained this snippet: “One early morning, over coffee in the breakroom, she casually mentioned her hobby - baking cakes. Too engrossed in my coffee ritual, I hardly grasped the depth of her words until she showed me her Instagram page.”

The scene reflects an instance where active listening could have enriched the interaction. I was physically present, but mentally distracted, more intent on my coffee than the individual before me. The moment struck me with its irony when Tiffany Vo Vasquez, a colleague, texted me, suggesting I write an article on the very topic of active listening.

In what felt like a scene from a science-fiction movie, my mind was transported back in time. I saw a previous mentor, their words of wisdom echoing through the years, "When someone comes to you, put down what you're doing, turn away from your screen, give them your full attention, look them in their eyes. While they are speaking, listen actively. Don't listen for your chance to jump in and give your response."

Indeed, "Active Listening".

So, what is its relevance in a business setting? And do people genuinely grasp the depth of its meaning? It's far more challenging than it seems, and I've noticed a striking lack of this vital skill, particularly amongst individuals in management roles. Tiffany quoted Peter F. Drucker, a renowned management thinker, “The most important thing in communication is hearing what isn’t said.”

Active listening is more than merely hearing words; it's about understanding the intent, acknowledging the feelings, and catching the subtleties that lie beneath the spoken words. It's about demonstrating empathy, showing respect, and building trust - core ingredients to healthy and productive relationships in any setting, especially in business.

To be an active listener is a journey of self-evolution and self-awareness. It involves constant practice and conscious effort, and it's more than worth the investment. As we listen actively, we learn more, understand better, and forge deeper connections. In the end, it makes us not just better colleagues, managers or leaders, but more empathetic and understanding human beings.

The path to mastering active listening may be steep, but the rewards are immeasurable. So, the next time you find yourself in a conversation, take a moment. Put down your coffee, turn away from your screen, and truly listen. You may be surprised at what you discover.

Thanks for reading,

William Rochelle, but you can call me Bill.

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