Excuses for a classic sickie

Come on admit it – we have all done it just about once – called in sick even though there’s nothing wrong with us; we just didn’t want to go to work that day for whatever reason! There are of course the stories of those people who are serial sickie day offenders and we even have the best days of the week to do it – Monday and Friday! (hate to state the obvious) … either side of a weekend we just sometimes want a longer weekend….

Then there are the excuses such as old rover the family dog passed way right through to the stories of people who have forgotten that good old grandma has now died six times in the space of less than two years! Or the one where you practice that voice that sounds like you have the flu … yes the flu…but really it’s just a bit of an act to make it sound more appealing to the boss who could be thinking “I don’t really believe you but just in case I also don’t want them to come into work in case they have it spread it…).

So, what are the top ten excuses people use for running late or pulling a sickie? Well, over the years as someone who has employed hundreds and thousands these are my classics ….

10. overslept: had to put this one in because it’s usually the most honest of all the excuses!  

9. headache: An oldie but a goodie because it can clear up by the following day

8. back pain: “boss I really hurt my back over the weekend…” – “oh no what happened?” – “I was driving my elderly uncle John to a reunion and when I was helping him out of the car I bent over the wrong way and hurt my back…but its ok I’ll be right by tomorrow I’ve taken some anti-inflammatory.” “Well I hope you get well soon. Just one question – Isn’t uncle John dead…?”

7. flu: a couple of coughs in the right place and bob’s your uncle. The most often used excuse during spring would you believe?

6. sprained ankle: Yes, a classic because come Tuesday morning the swelling could be gone…

5. tonsillitis: mostly used by those who have to talk for a living – very hard to prove because it can be a very hour by hour problem. Solution: “Not a problem, I’ll make sure we have some ice cream in the staff cafeteria for you.

4. sports injury: It’s a weekend thing when many people head off and play sport – sometimes the injuries don’t come from the field they come from the after-match function!

3. dog died: Rover is the gift that keeps on giving – until one day a former employee called me and said the dog had died and as I am consoling them you could hear a dog barking in the background … “praise be Rover has been resurrected!”  

2. death in the family: its an oldie but a goodie – you have so many family members to choose from that its next to impossible for the boss to know if it’s real or not – classic mistake is using the untimely death of an immediate relative – which is why some people go for the cousin thrice removed!

1. family emergency – sick child: would you believe some people use this excuse and they don’t have children?

Have you ever pulled a sickie? What excuse did you give? 

Matthew Tukaki is the Host of Talking Lifestyle Second Career on the Macquarie Radio network across Australia. He is also the Editor in Chief of EntreHub.org and NewsNow. You can follow him on Facebook HERE ....

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