Facing My Fears in Huge Waves

I started surfing again earlier this year after a 15-year hiatus (more on that later).   Relearning an old skill, rekindling a love affair with the ocean, and finding my soul has brought me tremendous joy.   

And it has taught me a lot. Especially last week, which had a couple of days which were, simply put, enormous.   

Watching from the beach, both of the big days looked out of my comfort zone.  Once out there, as I scrambled over set waves that were bigger than a house, it was crystal clear that my new goal was not about catching waves, but to stay alive for my family.   

I managed to keep myself out of harm’s way and avoid the biggest waves by paddling furiously toward the horizon once I saw them.  One broke while I was still paddling up the face.  I dove through the middle of it and felt it trying to drag me back into the pit.  Luckily I made it through. 

On the 2nd day I was exhausted by a 20-minute paddle out before I got anywhere near the waves.  Normally paddling out might take a minute or two at most.  I was diving beneath the smallest waves, which were easily 6-7 feet high and pounding.  But they were non-stop. I must have gone under 80, maybe 100 waves.  It was brutal.  I am in pretty good surf shape but my arms were killing me…  I would make some progress, dive under a wave, and it would push me back to my starting point.  Over and over and over again as I drifted down the beach with the current.  

Surfing is always a dance.  If you want to catch more waves, you need to position yourself closer to where the majority are breaking.  Simple logic.  But this means that the monster sets coming through are going to break on top of you.  On a smaller day, the strategy works.  This week, I didn’t feel I could afford to be caught in the wrong place. 

Each day ended the same way.  I caught a mid-size wave that was substantially over my head and rode my way back to the beach.  As surfers go, this qualifies as a pretty bad day.  

But when I look back at my experience in these huge waves, I am stoked on a bunch of things.  

• First of all, I tried. I was definitely scared watching from the beach. But I was even more scared once I was out there.  I faced my fear, got a close look at the situation, and kept myself safe.   
• I understand where my upper limits are.  This was more of a confidence issue, rather a skill issue.  I rode waves this size when I was younger and I know I will ride waves this size again.  But I have to rebuild my confidence.
• I know what I need to work on.  My arm strength was decent but I need to improve my lung capacity and mental conditioning.  In big days you need to be able to hold your breath for a long time and to stay calm while tumbling head over heels and getting completely disoriented.   
• I have gained more confidence in smaller days.  This is interesting. I guess the bigger days put things into perspective. If I can survive those days, I know I will be fine on the smaller days.  I am bringing more confidence to the beach now.   
• I appreciate the role of a coach.  My surf coach, the amazing Jeremy Ryan, was with me both days and, frankly, he had more confidence in my ability than I did.  Without his support and encouragement, I would not have tried to paddle out.  I would not have gained these lessons.  I am grateful for that. 

As you contemplate your life, your career, and where you are headed, what are fears can you can face and ultimately learn from?  Imaging the benefit of knowing exactly where your limits are and what you need to work on.

Maybe you should add a coach to your life to help you push through those barriers, someone who sees your potential more clearly than you do. 

Lastly, if you or someone you know is looking for a career coach or just contemplating a career pivot, please reach out to me.  It would be my honor to help them face their fears, find their career path and unlock their potential!  

Clayton 

Career Strategist / Career Coach 

Ampla Institute