Focus on REAL Relationships, Not DEAL Relationships

In business, we often ask ourselves if someone is trying to connect with us because they want something or do they genuinely want to get to know us? It's worth finding out who is the real deal.

“Let’s make a deal!”

Those words I heard from the salesman at the car dealership recently still echo in my head. He really wanted my sale and it made me feel uncomfortable.

His words seemed so old-fashioned and, dare I say, dirty?

It got me thinking … people can easily connect with us today through social media, so how do we know which professionals are real and which are “about the deal” (with the rapid advancement of AI, I use the term “real” both literally and figuratively)

REAL RELATIONSHIPS

Real relationships act as the gasoline fueling the fire of fast-growing companies. People aren’t the key to the success of a company - the right people are!

Real relationships have the following characteristics:

• Two professionals are in a mutually beneficial relationship
• They genuinely care about each other and want to see each other succeed
• They are in long-term and even life-long relationships

In addition, the two people usually know something personal about each other (marriage status, kids, etc.) and eager to learn more about each other.

DEAL RELATIONSHIPS

Deal relationships are superficial. There is a lot of small talk and rarely deep discussions. One person usually has an agenda.

Deal relationships usually have the following characteristics:

• The relationship revolves around “a deal”, transaction, or sale
• They are usually a one-sided (giver-taker, helper-user, talker-listener, etc.)
• Most often, they are short-term relationships

That said, deal relationships aren’t all bad. There are some professionals I’m more than happy to do business with and move on.

But it’s those real relationships that I believe people are missing out on. They are often life-changing, business-building, and career-making relationships that can change a person’s life.

THE REAL DEAL

“He’s the real deal”

There’s no better compliment.

Michael Jordan was referred to being the “real deal” early in his career. There was just something special about him. He went on to become one of the all-time, greatest basketball players in the world.

How can you tell if someone if the real deal?

Usually, it takes time. It takes time to get to know each other and build trust.

But, early on, there are signs to watch for in a person. Do they return your calls? Do they respond to your messages? Are they kind and courteous?

They don’t have to be perfect but they should be genuine.

Don’t be afraid to “test” people (I call it “experimental networking”)

Tell them you would like to chat and catchup. Request a meeting. Ask for a favor.

See who’s there for you.

If they are, you have the real deal.