Four reflections about my discovery journey to date

Four reflections about my discovery journey to date

A few months ago, I shared some thoughts about my decision to leave my corporate job. I’d found myself unfulfilled with how I was spending my professional time, out of alignment with my values, and not showing up as I wanted to for the people I cared about. I wrote about embarking on a “discovery journey,” seeking to understand more about myself, where I want to focus my professional energies, and how to do it in a sustainable way that serves me and my family. 

As suspected, I’m not alone in searching for such answers. Following my post, I received messages from people sharing their own stories. People who found themselves confronting questions about their career, their impact, how they spend their time, and how they balance all of this with personal wellbeing and family needs. I connected with several of them to understand how they were approaching their own “discoveries.” In doing so, I learned that there’s great variation in how one might tackle such an endeavor – but that equally, there’s a consistent sense of curiosity about how others approach it, along with a yearning to connect with others in a similar headspace. 

I’ve recently paused to take stock of what I’ve learned so far on my own journey, the key reflections I’ve had, and how I plan to move forward. With the above in mind, I decided to share these insights – to continue the exchange with others in the midst of their own “discoveries,” and maybe even to support those about to begin.

Steps I’ve taken so far and key reflections along the way

1. Understanding more about myself

Early on in my journey, I took time to check in with myself. I thought deeply about my personal mission, my why, the legacy I want to leave. I spent time reconfirming my values, seeking to understand what truly drives me. Through my own reflection and conversation with others, I reminded myself of my strengths and what I bring to the table.

Reflection 1: There’s a great benefit to revisiting your “why,” values, and strengths, even if you’ve identified them before

Like many others, I had done some of this work previously. I had identified a purpose that resonated with me and pinpointed my most important personal values. However, I found great benefit in revisiting my previous thinking and asking myself whether it still held true. After all, we grow and change throughout our lives. We learn new things about what drives us. Our experiences inform our sense of what we can (and want to) offer to others. And thus sometimes, our own narratives about our mission, values, and strengths need to evolve as well. 

I found that while many of my core values still held true, the way I thought about a few of them was no longer serving me. For example, I always knew that success drove me, particularly in terms of my external accomplishments and how I was perceived. This value and how I defined it were always part of the story I told myself. But at this juncture, I found myself wanting to redefine “success” to be about living life on my terms. 

At the same time, new areas of great importance to me had emerged. For example, I feel more strongly than ever about impact – spending my time on things that make a positive, meaningful difference. I also realized that showing up with authenticity is critical for me to feel connected. 

Revisiting my values gave me deeper insight into what wasn’t working for me in my previous role and what I need to more actively account for moving forward. This work early on in my journey has been an indispensable guide as I’ve progressed along the way.

2. Exploring where I want to spend my working time

I started my discovery with two goals in mind: One, I wanted to broadly explore the world beyond the large firms in which I’d spent my career to date. What topics and organizations resonated with me? Might something serve my professional and personal needs better than the corporate world? And two, I wanted to see whether and how I might turn my passion for intrapreneurship (thus far only a “side hustle”) into an entrepreneurial venture. 

In my broad exploration, I’ve focused on learning. I’ve spoken with tens of people from varied backgrounds who are working on areas of interest to me. I’ve begun to devour a stack of books (on everything from effective altruism to regenerative leadership to personal wellbeing). As I’ve learned, I’ve also conducted little experiments, e.g. by writing articles such as this one. Writing has become an outlet through which I can work through and structure my thoughts – while also “publicly” holding myself accountable to my most important goals. This exploration has been invaluable, helping me expand and then sharpen my understanding of the topics I’d like to focus on and what I’d prefer my working day to include. 

To explore a potential venture related to intrapreneurship, I participated in a 12-week accelerator program. While gaining valuable new skills related to both self-understanding and starting a venture, I also identified key insights about how corporate changemakers need support and what I might do next. 

At the end of the program, I pitched my research findings and a clear plan for how I'd move forward. But something wasn’t sitting right with me. I felt driven and motivated to make progress with a potential venture. And yet, in making these detailed plans and narrowing my focus, I felt I was neglecting (even ignoring) some of the insights I’ve taken from my broader exploration. 

Thus emerged the greatest tension of my discovery journey thus far: having complete control of my own time, how might I find the balance between staying open to new ideas and inspiration, while making specific progress on my goals?

Reflection 2: It’s important to acknowledge and manage the balance between openness / inspiration / creativity AND focus / planfulness / productivity

I’ll admit it: I love to make (and smash through) to-do lists. I thrive when identifying goals and creating structured plans to meet them. I come from a world in which progress, achievement, and discipline are rewarded. This side of the coin is relatively “easy” for me. What’s much harder is giving myself permission to hold space for creativity, serendipitous insights, and inspiration. I’m more likely to sit at my desk all day and work, rather than going for a swim in the lake and mulling over big ideas while surrounded by nature. When I travel into Zurich for inspirational in-person coffee chats, I at times wonder if I should instead be making “tangible” progress with something on my laptop. 

And yet – these moments of inspiration, being open to what comes my way, are critical in this time of immense personal growth. In always having a plan, what if I prevent myself from fully seeing the possibilities? If I focus on “connecting the dots” too soon, have I missed a bigger picture that resonates more with me? As I’ve started to more actively create and hold the space for new ideas, I’ve seen huge jumps in my thinking about what’s next for me (and what the working world needs). 

In speaking with others on their own “discoveries,” I learned that there are a range of ways to approach these questions. Some dove into identifying and pursuing opportunities right away, leveraging their planning and productivity muscles. Others were taking a day-by-day approach, listening to what felt good to them in the moment. Sometimes the variation in approach was driven by financial circumstances, but not always. 

I haven’t quite found the right balance for myself yet, although I think I’m getting closer. It’s certainly clear that there’s not only one correct way of doing things. But it’s worth acknowledging this tension and being conscious about where we fall on the spectrum.

3. Working in a sustainable way that serves me and my family

Even before leaving my corporate job, I had started a number of wellbeing practices which I’ve carried forward into today. For example, I start my working days with a short journaling session and close them with capturing a win from the day and what I’m grateful for. 

I’ve now explored some new topics too, such as Essentialism and Deep Work (both highly recommended). For example, I’m attempting to be mindful about which opportunities I take on during this time, saying no when they don’t serve me. I’ve also begun carving out “deep work” time where I don’t schedule meetings or calls. What was key here was identifying when I’m best able to get stuck in, whether I'm writing an article, conducting research, or creating a concept. I paid attention to when this felt “easiest” during the day, learning that for me, it was mid-morning to lunchtime. Where possible, I try to protect this time for uninterrupted work when I have something requiring my focus. Solidifying these practices now will, I hope, help me to work more sustainably in the future.

Reflection 3: It’s liberating to be discerning about accepting opportunities

Over the past few months, several opportunities have come up that I would normally have jumped for: speaking at an event, facilitating conference break-out sessions, work opportunities. When they’ve arisen, I’ve asked myself whether 1) they’re directly in line with what I want to be spending my time on right now, 2) they feel like an experiment I’d like to pursue and learn from, or 3) they’re tempting, but ultimately not a fit. When the answer was 3), I simply said no. This wasn’t always easy and some of these conversations were uncomfortable. But without fail, I felt right after doing so, because I had the space to focus on my own agenda. 

Of course, linked to Reflection 2 above, I’ve tried to keep an open mind about everything coming my way. This very experience speaks to the tension I’ve been encountering. However, I’ve quickly begun to build the muscle of evaluating opportunities with an open mind and then making a firm decision about them if they aren’t a fit. Saying “no” to some things has given me even more space to say “yes” to others. 

I aim to continue this practice going forward and encourage others to do the same. If we don’t consciously protect our time, we find ourselves time-poor, overcommitted and stretched too thin. And maybe it’s our own goals which get deprioritized.

Reflection 4: Some habits are really hard to break

I’m in a beautiful time in my life. I have the uncommon space to design my day and dictate how I spend it. My life is much less characterized by urgent emails, quick responses, and mandatory meetings than before. While I’m in touch with many people, I don’t have to be constantly connected. 

And yet, even so, I find myself repeating unhelpful habits that I’ve developed over the years. I still check my email first thing in the morning. I still monitor social media far more than necessary. I’m often listening to something (a podcast or even a show) instead of simply being with my thoughts. My phone is almost always nearby. And I don’t want it to be this way! 

What I’ve realized (admittedly, to my surprise) is that these and other habits run deep, and they aren’t “just” driven by my professional circumstances. I can’t simply blame stress or demanding stakeholders – the choice is truly mine. I now understand even more clearly that it’s going to take a concerted, conscious effort to target and break down the habits which no longer serve me. There’s no time like the present, but it might be harder than I thought.

Next steps on the journey

Where do I go from here? Linked to Reflection 4, working on my habits is going to be a big focus for me in the coming months. I want to be systematic about targeting and changing the ones that aren’t working for me. After all, if I can’t break some of these habits now (and replace them with better ones), then when? 

I’m also taking steps to more fully understand myself. I’m aiming to identify and explore what triggers me in different circumstances and why. I believe that a better understanding of my deep-rooted thought patterns will help me to more consistently be present and show up as I want to – professionally and personally. 

And finally, I’m seeking to loosen my grip on my to-do lists and planning to see what emerges for me. In the past few weeks, some exciting ideas have bubbled up about what my next step might look like. I’m going to continue to create space for these ideas to grow, rather than immediately rushing to structure and implement them. At the very least, it’ll be an experiment in working differently. 

In fact, given what I’ve learned (and admittedly, against my natural inclinations), I’m not going to spell out any more next steps. After all, the most beautiful parts of my journey thus far have emerged when I’ve least expected them.

#greatresignation #greatrealignment #greatreevaluation #careerchange #discovery #lifelonglearning #divergence #convergence #emergence #habits

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If you’ve been on a discovery journey, what reflections did you take away? In the spirit of learning and inspiration, any other resources you’d recommend? I’d love to hear from you via DM or comment.

Karen Dempster

Communicator. Author. Breaking down barriers to education. Speaker. IoIC Fellow. Coach. Co-Founder at Fit2Communicate. Photographer

2y

Thank you for sharing the latest phase of your journey. Looking forward to hearing about the next one.

Rob Aalders

I help innovators and leaders to grow an innovation friendly environment.

2y

Great update Kara! Good to read where you are at this point! Looking forward to what’s next.

Céline Bucher, PMP, SHRM-SCP

Organisational Development Lead | Transformation & Change Driver I HR & Project Professional I InnerMBA

2y

Thank you for sharing Kara. So much of this resonates so deeply from disconnecting with the world to connect with ourselves to balancing free flow and creativity vs planning and structuring to keeping an open mind and presence even when engaged on a certain path!

Casey Erickson

Head of Executive Search @ Captivate Talent | Leadership Coach

2y

This is an awesome post. So many of these things ring true for me too. I am so happy that you've been able to take a step back and take stock of what is most important. True success and happiness come from within and being able to be with yourself. Excited to learn more about your takeaways on this journey!

Mark Heasman FRSA

Mobilising people to take action on mental wellbeing, climate adaptation, and social equity. All views expressed are my own, personal ones.

2y

Love reading these updates and reflections Kara, thanks for sharing!

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