From Setback to Setup - Shaking off Disappointment

Turning Year-End Reflections into Hope

As the year draws to a close, many of us find ourselves looking back on the past twelve months. For some, it’s a time to celebrate achievements and milestones. For others, it’s a period of reckoning—a moment to confront missed goals or unexpected setbacks.

The end of the year can often be bittersweet for me, filled with a mixture of gratitude and disappointment. But, this year, I was intentional about looking at this reflection differently.

Instead of seeing disappointment as failure, I embraced it as a crucial part of life’s journey—and a stepping stone to growth? 🌟

Disappointment, while painful, carries within it the potential for transformation. It invites us to pause, reassess, and realign with what truly matters.

And, as we approach the festive season, a time synonymous with hope and renewal, it’s the perfect moment to explore how small wins can lead to bigger successes, how reframing disappointment can shift our perspective, and how community can anchor us in moments of doubt.

I write mostly to the women who have consistently shown up this year, even when support didn’t, this is your reminder that greatness often comes from perseverance. It’s not about denying the pain of disappointment but about finding meaning within it. 💡

Reframing Disappointment

It never feels good at the time, but shifting your mindset will shape how you navigate setbacks. We can choose to see our disappointments as setups for comebacks or spiral into hopelessness, which often leads to feeling stuck or procrastinating.

However, the way we interpret these moments can profoundly impact how we move forward.

Cognitive reframing—the practice of shifting your perspective on a situation—is a powerful tool for transforming disappointment into an opportunity 🌈

Instead of asking, “Why did this happen to me?” try asking, “What can I learn from this?”

This simple shift in questioning changes disappointment from a place of defeat and overwhelm, casting a shadow over our achievements to a place of growth and hope.

For example, losing your job through redundancy might lead to discovering new skills or passions that align more closely with your long-term goals.

Similarly, a strained relationship might offer insights into your needs and boundaries, paving the way for healthier connections.

The Power of Small Wins

In a world that often glorifies grand achievements, it’s easy to overlook the significance of small wins. Yet, these modest victories are the building blocks of resilience and progress.

The nativity story, central to Christmas celebrations, is a poignant reminder of the power of small beginnings. A child born in a manger in the humblest of circumstances carries a message of hope that transcends time.

A story that illustrates greatness often emerges from the smallest, seemingly insignificant starts. Similarly, our small wins— are like traditions; acts which may seem trivial in our seemingly modern lifestyles, but they remind us to find joy in the present and celebrate the beauty of the moment. They ground us in gratitude and give us the courage to keep moving forward. 🎁

Let this season remind us of the power of reframing our setbacks.

Every small win, no matter how modest, deserves to be cherished, even when it feels insignificant. It creates momentum, instils confidence, and reminds us that progress is still progress, no matter how incremental!!!!

The Role of Community

No journey of growth happens in isolation. May we see challenges not as immovable barriers but as stepping stones, finding strength in our communities.

The festive season, with its emphasis on togetherness, is a powerful reminder of the importance of community. When disappointment strikes, the presence of a supportive network can make all the difference. 🤝

Friends, family, and trusted circles provide the space to process, heal, and rebuild. They remind us that we are not alone in our struggles and offer perspectives we may not see on our own.

Beyond close circles, communities with shared passions can be equally enriching. For Black and Brown women, these spaces may provide a sanctuary of understanding and shared experience.

Whether it’s a book club that celebrates diverse voices, a fitness group that champions wellness, or an online forum that amplifies underrepresented stories, these communities offer encouragement and inspiration to keep you focused in your journey.

Being part of such a network can be a source of strength, helping you to turn setbacks into stepping stones while honouring your unique path. 🌍

These moments, however heavy, are not the end of the road, but the beginning of a new path. Together, we can weather life’s storms, emerging braver, wiser, and stronger on the other side.

A Festive Call to Hope

As Christmas approaches and the New Year beckons, let’s open our hearts to the truth that every disappointment carries the spark of opportunity.

Linking back to the original story of Christmas. Imagine giving birth, with no pain relief, raw and primal, sweating like you’ve just run a marathon— Humble beginnings, indeed!

Then, as you cradle your miracle, someone says, “No crib?"

"Here’s a hay-filled trough where cows eat breakfast.”

Exhausted, you laugh-cry, thinking, “Really, God? This is the plan?”

These absurd questionable moments remind us to pause, breathe, and find joy in the journey rather than focusing solely on the destination.

This Christmas, I hope you can take a moment to acknowledge your journey, may you realise challenges as opportunities for growth and release the weight of unmet expectations, to lift up your small wins.

Our setbacks are not just tokens of our perseverance but receipts of our transformative greatness and the brighter days that lie ahead.

Let us make time this season to honour our unique journeys—to celebrate the triumphs, acknowledge the trials, and embrace everything in between leaning on our communities, knowing that together, we can weather the storms and emerge stronger.

Wishing you a Christmas filled with hope, renewal, and the courage to turn every setback into a beautiful setup for success, especially those who feel like they are starting again from the beginning🎄 set aside your disappointments as surely you will rise.

“You may trod me in the very dirt, but still, like dust, I rise.” — Maya Angelou

📣 Bitesize weekly content! We hope you have enjoyed it. See you next year x

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