NO GNOMES | The Edit of Hotel Yards & Patios

Stay away gnome…

Now, I don't mind the odd gargoyle - I have a wonderful antique one on my petite garden terrasse at the London loft which menacingly glares towards my most unpopular neighbour's balcony (it chose the direction, not me), and I would love some Renaissance sculptures peeking out above the hydrangeas. But the one thing that I cannot tolerate is the humble garden gnome - whether in plastic, plaster, wood or cast in gold, any variety of those middle-earth characters is banned and should, in my humble opinion, be expelled to some far-off galaxy - but not on board my rocket ship. According to the magic of Google, the garden gnome was first created in the 16th century, by Philippus Aureolus Theophrastus Bombastus Von Hohenheim, a Swiss-born alchemist, lay theologian and scientist (seriously), AKA  Paracelsus. 

As someone who spends a lot of time tube travelling - underground, trains or planes (rockets are on my to-do-list Messrs Branson, Musk), I rather relish checking into a hotel-guesthouse which has a dedicated open-air space for its guests - arguably, as important as the hotel bar or help-yourself kitchen pantry to me. These patches of vert, patios of style and cultivated backyards offer a moment of sanctuary to re-balance the senses, take in a view, or seek the shade of a tree. I often chillax in the arms of an oversized Honoré's classic Croisette armchair, take a garden-side post-Pilates morning espresso, or find the perfect pitch around the fire pit in the Highlands for a page-turner like my current favourite: A Family History of Humanity by Simon Sebag Montefiore, I would need a week's stay for the 1344 pages 🤗.

Thankfully, amigos of good taste, our picks are pleasingly void of any Hitchcock, Santa-esque-looking figurines. Instead, here are a few unique spots that have escorted me many an hour whilst on my travels allowing me to refresh the cabin-tired lungs and witness the late-night 'Absacker' (the last one for the road to bed) from Syros to Merano, Antwerp to Tuscany.

Hugs

Iain & Co.