Got what you wanted?

People. They never cease to amaze me. Just when you think you've got them sussed they go and surprise you.

On Friday morning I closed down the bank account of my first business venture - She's Back. "Business" is a loose term since the reason I was closing the account was that a total lack of a business model (aka any idea as to how I'd actually make any money) meant it really was time to shut up shop.

Not being one to hide my failure (or success to be fair) under a barrel and not having much of a presence on Instagram or Twitter, for reasons we explored last week, I posted a little picture on LinkedIn and wrote a few paragraphs about the whys and the wherefores. Turns out that either people do like to read about a failure or they like someone who at least has a go because that post attracted, at the last count, over 53,000 views.

Where were those 53,000 people when we were trying to get the thing off the ground! No matter. I've moved on and many of them said very nice things so I'm not arguing.

Trust the people.

Got What You Wanted?

I did't. I seem to live in the only London borough that rejected Labour, in favour of a mayoral candidate who has recently returned from a five year ban, after being convicted of vote rigging, buying votes and religious intimidation. I have no idea how this happened. His party is called Aspire.

Elsewhere the election results gave us a pretty good indication of what the rest of the country aspires to.

Scotland - Independence please. I have to say, comparing Nicola to the shambles that's going on in a lot of other places, I can't say I blame them. I think if I were Scottish, I'd probably like to distance myself from the behaviour and decisions coming out of Westminster.

Northern Ireland - Can we have some of what Scotland are having please. The press are only just beginning to focus on the seismic consequences of what's going on there. And it's way more complicated and potentially problematic than the Scottish question.

The Scenic South - We're liberal, tolerant, green and now that Ed Davey's lost a bit of weight we'll throw ours behind him.

The Grim North - (it's not grim, it's lovely by the way) - We're still not convinced by that posh bloke with a funny name so we'll give Boris another chance (his last one, I suspect).

London & other "clever" cities (population skewed to the young and intellectual) - Labour of course.

There you go, my election analysis. You can save yourself hours poring through the Sunday papers' political pages now.

No More Royals

In a move which looks like a pre-emptive strike, I just read that the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge (Labour, see above) have decided from now on they want to be called Wills and Kate. I hate to break it to them but I suspect that this is how most of the country refers to them now, that is if they refer to them at all.

No More Meghan

Meghan hasn't had a good week either. Not only have she & Harry been booted off the line up for the Balcony photos during the Jubilee celebrations, Netflix have cancelled her show. It was going to be called "Pearl" and was "a feminist children's series".

Probably a wise decision. In my experience, children are fickle creatures, are apt to make up their own minds about things and will not have tastes forced up on them. They are as picky about TV shows as they are about vegetables. You cannot predict or dictate what they will enjoy. I mean, who in their right minds would have thought that a show about an anthropomorphic female piglet would soon be celebrating its 18th anniversary.

Anthropomorphic. My new favourite word.

More Madness at the Met

Does anyone understand a. what the Met Ball is for and b. why there is so much fuss? Don't get me wrong, I like a good party and I do appreciate the opportunity to buy a new frock but I can't for the life of me figure out the point of the Met Ball.

For starters, most people seem to wear outfits that are designed to prevent other party-goers from getting anywhere near them. Like a fancy 10 feet train, or some weird extended headdress or a dress made of actual meat. How do you party in that? Aren't parties supposed to be about drinking, chatting and dancing?

Apparently Anna Wintour vetos the guest list, what time everyone is allowed to arrive and what they can wear. And she doesn't exactly look like the life and soul of a party, does she. I'll not be holding out for an invitation to next year's event.

The Queen's Pudding

Did you know that there's a competition running to create a "signature" pudding for the Queen's birthday. It's madness. They are taking it as seriously as the Booker prize. There were 5,000 entries, and they created a "long list" of 12 and now they're down to a "short list" of 5.

The fact that we can't vote for politicians on a relatively consistent basis across the country makes me think we're unlikely to be able to agree on just one "platinum pudding" as the winner will be known.

Why don't they, instead, let each of the five regions have their own. To save them all the bother, here's my list:

Scotland - Cranachan

Ireland - Guinness & chocolate cake

The Scenic South - Clotted cream scones

The not so grim North - Treacle sponge & custard

London and other "clever" cities - some gluten free, vegan nonsense with no cream on the side.

Summer

It's here. I've just checked the weather app and I am genuinely very excited about the weather prospects for the next two weeks. An excitement I need to temper if I'm to make sure my latest business venture doesn't go the way of the last one.

Have a good week folks, don't forget the sun screen.

I'm watching: Julia. My husband can't stand Sarah Lancashire. I, on the other hand, love her. I thought she was superb in Happy Valley. Came across Julia on one of the many (soon to be fewer) streaming platforms and decided that it would be nice to watch a TV programme that didn't involve a woman being horribly mutilated. Loving it.

I'm listening to: What really happened in the 90s podcast with Robert Carlyle. The premise is that the roots of all the problems we're facing today can be traced back to things that happened in the 90s. It's nonsense but an entertaining listen nevertheless.

I'm reading: The Bell Jar. I did enjoy Sorrow and Bliss but it reminded me just how good this is, so I'm having a little re-read. (Actually, that's not entirely true - I'm listening to the audiobook which is narrated by Maggie Gyllenhaal - superb).