Handling life when you’re shaken up 🌪️

Welcome to Quick Confidence! This weekly letter delivers a spritz of stories, tips and actions that will build your confidence and power. Each tip bolsters confidence in your body, mind, and relationships so you can lead yourself and others to greatness. Quick Confidence is also a book! Get your copy to carry confidence wherever you go.

We’ve all had those times when life pulls the rug out from under us. Maybe it’s a work setback, a family conflict, an incident in your community, or a health issue. Whatever the cause, when life shakes us up, our natural reaction is often to withdraw. And while a little self-reflection is healthy, isolating for too long can make us feel even more vulnerable and unsteady.

Having dealt with some unexpected health issues lately myself, I understand well the urge to isolate—seeking security and avoiding communication, turning to vices (hello 👋 Milka chocolate bars with hazelnuts!), or even dismissing or ignoring feelings. But I’ve also learned that while these habits might offer temporary comfort, they can keep us stuck in place. Finding small (but healthy) ways to ease our pain or discomfort, acknowledging “what is,” and reconnecting with the people and activities that truly uplift us have a much more profound impact in helping us move forward.

This week’s Quick Confidence issue is all about finding ways to ground ourselves, even when we feel like everything’s spinning. Give these tips a try next time life feels uncertain.

Quick Confidence Tips for Staying Grounded in Unsteady Times

1. Interpersonal: Resist the turtle🐢shell. When you’re hurting, it’s tempting to retreat and try to manage everything on your own. But as comfortable as it might feel to hide in our metaphorical “shell,” isolating ourselves often intensifies feelings of insecurity and instability. Instead, let’s focus on doing the opposite: reaching out, even when it feels hard. Why? Research shows that connecting with others can be one of the fastest ways to regain confidence and perspective. Sometimes, just hearing a friend say, “I’ve been there too,” can help you breathe a little easier. Sharing your worries with someone who cares about you lightens the load, and those conversations often bring clarity, solutions, and support you didn’t even know you needed. So the next time you’re feeling low, resist the urge to turtle up and try reaching out. Send a quick text to a trusted friend, call a family member, or chat with a colleague. Share as much or as little as you feel comfortable with; the point is to stay connected.
2. Embodied: Focus on small, grounding actions. When we’re feeling shaken, it’s hard to concentrate on anything too big or demanding. That’s why small, grounding actions work so well—they keep us in the present and help us feel stable without overwhelming us. Doing just one manageable thing, like going for a walk, tidying a corner of your space, or making a healthy meal, can help break the cycle of worry and reassure your mind that you’re still in control. So when it feels like you’re standing on a bed of quicksand, try picking one thing you can do today that’s meaningful but manageable. It could be a five-minute meditation, a favorite set of quick stretches, or planning a small, pleasant thing to look forward to. For me, that’s cooking an easy but comforting meal—my favorite is my dad’s recipe for Keema (a beloved Pakistani and Indian dish he’d serve with warm naan). Focusing on that small act can be a beautiful thing. It can give you a sense of accomplishment and enjoyment, no matter how tough things are.
3. Mindset: Practice a “Steadying Statement.” When everything around you feels shaky, creating a steadying mantra for yourself can serve as a reminder of your own resilience. The goal is to repeat a simple phrase that reinforces that you have what it takes to navigate the storm. Some of my favorite steadying statements are: “I’ve faced uncertainty before, and I came out stronger.” “One step at a time; I don’t have to solve everything today.” “I am so much stronger than I realize.” “I have the problem-solving skills and resilience to handle what comes my way, just like I have before.” Find a mantra that resonates with you, and repeat it whenever you feel anxiety creeping in. Over time, these words can be like a reassuring hand on your shoulder, reminding you that you’re grounded, capable, and resilient.

These small, intentional actions can help restore your inner balance and remind you that, even when life feels a bit shaky, you’re strong enough to face it. Confidence is built in moments of uncertainty—it’s easy to feel self-assured when everything’s going smoothly, but the real test of confidence is how we respond when things get messy. Even if you don’t feel strong right now, remember that choosing how to navigate these ups and downs is what builds lasting resilience.

So, next time life catches you off guard, you’ll be ready to not only manage but thrive. Wishing you resilience and confidence, no matter what comes next.

What grounding practices do you use to stay steady? Drop a comment—I’d love to hear what’s worked for you.

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