Honoring John Ruhlin: The Greatest Relationship Builder of Our Time

This week’s episode is a tough but important one. I wanted to take a moment to honor someone who profoundly impacted my life—my friend, John Ruhlin.

Tragically, John passed away unexpectedly about two months ago at just 44 years old. When I first heard the news, I was in complete shock and I’ve been doing my best to process it ever since.

For those who knew John, you’ll understand when I say he was one of the greatest relationship builders of all time. He had a gift for connecting with people in a way that was truly special. Losing someone like John—a close friend and a larger-than-life presence—makes you reflect on what truly matters in life.

I’m heartbroken by his loss, but at the same time, I feel incredibly grateful to have known him. He taught me how to show up differently, how to treat others with genuine care, how to connect on a deeper level and how to give without expecting anything in return.

In this episode, I’m sharing the many lessons John taught me—lessons that continue to shape how I live my life. My hope is that by sharing his wisdom, I can honor his legacy and pass on some of the incredible insights that made John who he was.

Upholding John’s Legacy: Support His Family

You can help honor John’s legacy and support his family by making a donation. Every little amount helps and will go directly toward taking care of his wife Lindsay and their four daughters (Reagan, Blakely, Saylor and Layton, ages 4 to 13). Click here to make a donation.

My Key Takeaways:

Mastering the Art of Introductions

• John didn’t just introduce people, he built bridges. He made you feel like the connection he was making could change your life because in many cases, it did. He took the time to highlight what made each person special, making the introduction feel invaluable and unforgettable.

“Don't show up the same. Show up different. Put a scratch in the record.” – John Ruhlin

The Importance of Showing Up with Heart

• John understood that to make an impact, you had to break the mold. Whether it was a birthday, an anniversary or a thank you, John didn’t rely on generic gestures. He recorded personal birthday videos, sent gifts at unexpected times and always found a way to make you feel seen. In a world full of sameness, John’s approach was a breath of fresh air. It reminded me that standing out means showing up with heart and intention.

“In life, we have to remember that nothing is forever. We can't take any day for granted. And you have to love those that matter the most.” – Brad Johnson

Gifting and Radical Generosity

• For John, gifting was never about the price tag or the brand. It was about how deeply it reflected the person receiving it. He never slapped his company logo on anything; instead, he engraved your name, your mantra or something meaningful to you. His gifts were an extension of his love for people. They were a symbol of how much he valued the relationship with no expectation of anything in return. That radical generosity left a mark on me and everyone lucky enough to know him.

“John was the world's best connector and relationship builder that I'd ever met...the best gifts he gave, truthfully, were connecting great humans.” – Brad Johnson

You can help honor John’s legacy and support his family by making a donation. Every little amount helps and will go directly toward taking care of his wife Lindsay and their four daughters (Reagan, Blakely, Saylor and Layton, ages 4 to 13). Click here to make a donation.

More on Doing Business and Doing Life.

It was a few years ago when I first read Jocko Willink ’s Discipline Equals Freedom Field Manual and his passage titled "Death". I remember how it stood out to me as this was written by a man who was a Navy Seal who had witnessed some of the closest people to him succumb to death on the battlefield. What I remember is how this passage communicated that even in death, there is good.

I feel very fortunate that in 2016 Joey Coleman introduced me to John and said that he was the person I “absolutely had to meet and have come on my podcast!” Therein began a friendship that lasted for close to a decade before he passed away a couple of months ago. I’m grateful to have known John. Today, I’m a better husband, father and friend because of what I learned from him. I want to honor his legacy and the man that he was by sharing some of the lessons he left with me.

For those of you out there that were fortunate enough to have known the man himself, you already know what I’m talking about. For those of you out there that never got the chance to meet him, I’m hopeful some of the lessons shared in this episode can make you a better version of yourself.