How to Build Relationships at HBCU Homecomings

HBCU homecomings are more than just football games, step shows, and parties—they're opportunities to network, reconnect, and build relationships that can benefit your personal and professional life. The connections made at these events go beyond small talk—they can lead to mentorship, partnerships, career opportunities, and lifelong friendships.

For those of you who don’t know, I went to the best HBCU in the country, the Illustrious Morgan State University. But that's beside the point—homecoming is still important at the other HBCUs, even if they aren't as relevant as Morgan State, lol.

Here’s a guide to navigating homecoming and building relationships:

1. Do Your Research Before You Arrive

• Get an idea of what's going on: Look at your school’s website, follow their Instagram and Facebook pages, and check hashtags like #homecoming2024. Visit the Alumni Association page for the latest updates.
• Ask around: Look on Eventbrite or text 2 or 3 people and ask them, "Are you going to Homecoming this year?" This will give you a better sense of what’s happening and help you decide where to go.
• Know the key events: Homecoming is packed with activities—Greek step shows, comedy shows, concerts, football games, parties, brunches, campus tours, and more. Plan ahead so you don’t miss out.

2. Mix School-Sponsored and Non-Sponsored Events

• Hit both official and unofficial events: While mixers and panels are great for structured networking, non-sponsored events like alumni parties or meetups often create more relaxed environments where people open up more easily.
• Extend invitations: Some folks just show up without knowing what’s going on. Ask people what they have planned and invite them to events you’re attending. If you’re heading to a non-school-sponsored event, absolutely invite them along—this helps foster deeper connections and ensures they feel included.
• This year I went to the Alumni Brunch before the football game and met an outfit twin from the class of 1969.

3. Know Your Limits and Plan for the Long Haul

• HBCU homecoming isn’t just a couple of hours—it can be a full 4-5 day experience.
• Hydrate and show up consistently: When you’re well-rested and hydrated, you can make better impressions. People appreciate when you’re fully engaged in conversations—without feeling rushed or burned out.
• There’s going to be a lot of Q oil, jungle juice, and drinks around. You don’t need to accept every drink—just hit them with a polite, ‘Next round’s on me, though!’"
• I always pack some Liquid IV and Tylenol in my fanny pack.

4. Take an Uber or Lyft

• Be safe and responsible: Just like any big event, homecoming usually involves drinks. Take an Uber or Lyft to avoid any trouble.
• Parking is usually horrible: Save yourself the stress of finding a parking spot—campus will be packed.
• Carpool when you can: If you’re staying at a hotel and spot folks in your HBCU’s gear, hit them with: “Hey, are you heading to homecoming? I’m about to call an Uber—want to ride together?”

5. Compliment and Connect

• Pay attention to details: Compliments are great conversation starters. If you see someone with a unique accessory, hairstyle, or outfit, mention it. This can break the ice and open the door for deeper conversations.
• Follow up a compliment with an invitation: If you connect over a compliment, invite them to join you at the next event. For example, after commenting on someone’s glasses, you can say, “I’m heading to the alumni party tonight—if you’re free, roll through!”
• A simple compliment can make a lasting impression.

6. Take Breaks When Needed

• Even extroverts need a break: Look, I’m a super extrovert. I love meeting new people and having deep conversations—but even I get overwhelmed sometimes.
• Step away when necessary: I usually take 15-20 minutes to recharge my social battery. Some folks need longer, and that’s okay. Find a quiet spot to collect your thoughts and catch your breath.

7. Respect the Strolls and Step Shows

• Let the Greeks do their thing: This isn’t a Soul Train line—don’t disrupt the fraternities and sororities while they’re strolling or stepping. Just enjoy the show and soak in the energy.

8. Connect with Current Students

• Ask about their major and career plans.
• Offer introductions and advice: I’ve been in my career for over 10 years, and I probably know someone in their field—maybe even someone I used to party with in college.
• Visit student organization tents or booths: If you were part of any student organizations, stop by their tent or booth during the tailgate. Most of them are grilling and chilling, and it’s a great way to reconnect with old friends and meet new members.

9. Find Out How You Can Support People

• Ask meaningful questions to go deeper: When someone tells me what they do, I ask, “Is that something you plan on doing for a long time?” It’s a great way to understand their passion—or if they’re considering a career change.
• A friend I haven’t seen in years told me they opened a restaurant in Georgetown (DC). I stayed in the DMV for a few extra days after homecoming and stopped by his restaurant for dinner. If you're in the area it's called Talea(I highly recommend the Short Rib Lasagna and the Branzino).

• Support can come in many forms: Showing up to their event, giving their business a shoutout on social media, sending them an internal referral, or connecting them with the right person. Small gestures often leave a lasting impact.

10. Don’t Force a Relationship

• Some people may be on a schedule: It’s okay if someone doesn’t have time to talk—don’t take it personally. Some folks may be on a tight schedule or need time to cool down.

11. Join an Alumni Chapter

• Stay connected beyond homecoming: Even if you’ve moved away, most HBCUs have regional alumni chapters you can join to stay involved and support your alma mater.

12. Be Sure to Give Back

• Donate and volunteer: Give to student organizations, scholarship funds, or community initiatives. Homecoming isn’t just about fun—it’s a chance to support the next generation.

13. Rep Your HBCU Gear After Homecoming

• After Morgan’s Homecoming, I stuck around in DC to visit family for a few days. When I wore my Morgan shirt at my nephew’s little league football game, a fellow alum spotted me, and we ended up reminiscing about how homecoming has changed over the years.

14. Follow Up and Keep the Connection Alive

• Follow through on promises: If you said you’d connect someone with a resource or follow up, do it.
• Get multiple points of contact: I always get their number, LinkedIn, Facebook, Instagram—everything. Once I get their number, I save it and immediately text them my full name. People forget names quickly, so I make it easy for them.
• Stay visible: When you connect with people on multiple platforms, you’ll see them on your feed more often, which makes it easier to stay in touch.
• Consistency matters: Comment on their posts, invite them to future events, or grab a coffee. Relationships grow through consistent effort.

HBCU homecoming is a perfect blend of fun, culture, and opportunity. It’s more than just a weekend celebration—it’s a chance to build relationships that last a lifetime.