How to Have a Coaching Conversation
Conor Neill
President @ Vistage Spain | Accelerating Business Growth | Senior Lecturer @ IESE Business School
"The leader as coach" is being taught at all the best business schools these days.
What does it mean to use coaching as a leader? Let's take a step back: what is the purpose of a leader?
The Purpose of Leadership
"Leadership is the art of getting people to want to do what must be done" Jim Collins
I'm currently reading Jim Collins' latest book: BE (Beyond Entrepreneurship) 2.0. Jim shares his definition of leadership: "Leadership is the art of getting people to want to do what must be done". There are 3 important elements of this definition:
- It is an art
- It is the leader's responsibility to find out what needs to be done
- It is not about getting the work done, it is about getting people to want to do it
Leadership is the art of seeing a better future and getting people to want to do the work to create this better future.
Coaching is a toolset that allows us to provide "scaffolding" for others. Scaffolding allows a building to grow higher... Coaching helps others to develop a more responsible, proactive, capable way of approaching the challenges they face in life. The leader acting as coach is the leader growing the people around them, rather than being the genius solving the problems.
How to Have a Coaching Conversation
In its simplest form, a coaching conversation has 4 basic parts:
- what's up?
- what's so?
- What's possible?
- Let's Go!
This is a lesson from an experienced Leadership Coach called Kris Girrell who I have had the pleasure of working with in my years working with the senior leadership team of Avanade. Here's a video I made during one of our programs together in Champery, in the Swiss Alps.
The Coaching Conversation
What's up?
What is happening for you? What is the other person paying attention to? What is going well? What is bothering them? Who is on their mind? I want to see through their eyes.
What's So?
What does it mean to the other person? What is important and what is not important? What values are being challenged?
What's Possible?
This set of questions explores the possible. This dialogue is about opening up the resourcefulness of the other person... to see that they do have choice and a number of levers that they can control.
Let's Go!
This is about action. Coaching is not therapy. Our meaning is rooted in the past, but coaching is about seeing possible actions, committing to do the work and become a better version of yourself.
More on Coaching
- Why Business Leaders hire Coaches an exhaustive list of 34 triggers that often cuase a business leader to seek the support of a coach
- How to Stop people talking about Problems a simple acronym that leadership coach Dan Rockwell uses to shift people away from problem focus towards possibility focus
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I hope this article gave you some practical ideas for how to take charge of your life.
Thanks for reading,
Conor
Make sure to check out more of my latest articles because little things keep becoming bigger and better when you think about them in new and different ways.
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Motivational Speaker & Coach. NEW AUTHOR CREDO 🦋. Creator of the Inspiring The Next Generation mission. Leadership & Personal Development. Love to see others shine.
3yWhat a wonderful view, and a great share, thank you as always Conor.
Supply Chain & Operations Executive Search | IESE Alumni Executive Coach⎮Founder⎮Angel Investor⎮C-Suite Advisor⎮Headhunter⎮Hispanic & Latinxs Ambassador⎮Global Mobility
3yLoved the video…. Why were you suit up? …. Or better, what made you suit up in such a magnificent scenario?
Passionate about innovation ★ Transformation Specialist ★ Scrum Master ★ Design Thinker ★ Managing Director ★ Sales Activator ★ Screenwriter & Storyteller
3y"Leadership is the art of getting people to want to do what must be done", Love this quote! Thanks for sharing, Conor.
Marketing & Commercial Excellence Leader EMEA | Healthcare, Medical Devices | Executive Coach & Mentor
3yVery instructive as usual Conor Neill, I really enjoy your videos. And what a setting ! I am one of the lucky ones to live in that beautiful country ;-) Hope to see you soon.
Advisor-mentor-consultant to c-suite & board members of multi-national & national, large & small, corporations & organisations. Speaker & trainer sharing secrets of scientific corporate governance, strategy & planning.
3yThe four answers you get depends upon the frame of reference of the answerer... if they are stuck in operational thinking you'll get one set of answers, but if they have the training & talent to see strategically, you'll get a different set of answers.