How To Overcome Imposter Syndrome

Sometime in 2018, Michelle Obama spoke to an audience of 300 students at Elizabeth Garrett Anderson School in Islington and told them - "I still have a little bit of impostor syndrome, it never goes away, that you're actually listening to me."

She continued, "It doesn't go away, that feeling that you shouldn't take me that seriously. What do I know? I share that with you because we all have doubts in our abilities, about our power and what that power is."

Let's talk about imposter syndrome today and 6 ways to overcome it.

Impostor syndrome is a term used to describe feelings of insecurity or self-doubt, despite there being no evidence to support such a belief.

It's a constant hum inside our head going - "You are not good enough. You will fail. People will laugh at you. You can't do this. You are not smart or intelligent or rich enough to do this. How dare you have ambition? You will fail if you take up more. You are not good enough...."

Sound familiar? This has happened to me ( still happens ), happened to my friends and must have happened to you.

We all go through life thinking we are not smart enough to take on more. That is a lie. That is imposter syndrome and it never truly goes away. It may stem from our childhood memories, past failures, negative people around us, trolls on social media, bad job experiences, unsupportive family members - there is no dearth of people around us who are ready to pull us down.

The question is: Will you let them? Or will you understand yourself, work harder, work smarter, ask for more and prove yourself, despite feeling not good enough. Yes, even 'Fake it till you make it' can work.

Here are 6 easy ways to overcome imposter syndrome:

Build Your Case

Innocent, till proven guilty. If someone says you are not worthy enough or qualified enough for something, eg, a job, then build your case, as a lawyer would do for a client. Assess the truth in that statement. Is it true? Or only partially true? Do you lack the skills to do the job or will it just take you a little more time? What are the strengths that are unique to you and they don't know yet? Remove the hurt and anger and disappointment - remove emotions and use reason and logic. Do a pros and cons list before you accept that you are indeed, not worth it.

Stop Comparing With Others/ Measuring Yourself Against Others

We all have our role models - we look up to them and want our lives and careers to be like them. Stop. You don't know their journey and you can't just emulate the success. Measuring yourself against others and comparing can only make you feel bad about yourself. Be inspired by the work they are doing. Try to work in similar lines. However, empty comparison on every aspect will only make you feel like your life and career are not enough. Track your journey, not theirs.

Appoint Your Personal Board Of Directors

As YouTuber Amy Landino states - Appoint your personal board of directors. In medieval times, there used to be a champion who would fight for their king/ queen. Who are your champions? Who are the people who will always encourage you and who genuinely believe in your talent, your work ethic and your dreams? Be warned - it rarely is from our immediate family or friends. They may just not understand and end up telling you that you are not capable enough. When in doubt, go to your personal board of directors and get that motivation back.

Become A Master At Your Craft/ An Expert

Be the best at what you do. Be so busy being the best at what you do that others can see your success, your expertise, the mastery of your craft. It doesn't matter then if they call you an imposter - your work will speak for itself.

Imagine The Worst-Case Scenario

Really think - What is the worst that could happen? If I take up this new role and can't deliver results in 6 months? If I start my YouTube channel? If I want to transition to a different career path? If I ask for a higher salary? If I publish my book?

What is the worst that could happen? If you are ok with the answers, then you are all set to go ahead and try. We fear more in our heads than in reality.

Look At Yourself In Third Person

Imagine you are recommending a good friend for a job. What will you say about him/her? Now do the same for yourself. We are often kinder to others than to ourselves.

The surest way to overcome imposter syndrome is to remove the 'I' from 'I am not good enough'. That's all. You will think more rationally and be able to sell yourself better to people who may be doubting your abilities.

I want to end this article with the powerful words of Michelle Obama, who went to Harvard and lived her dreams, despite her high school counsellor telling her she was not smart enough.

She says, "My advice to young women in that you have to start by getting those demons out of your head. The questions I ask myself - 'am I good enough?' - that haunts us because the messages that are sent from the time we are little is: maybe you are not, don't reach too high, don't talk too loud."

Don't lose your power to someone who doesn't even know your potential. They may themselves not be smart enough and thus trying to keep the power balance in their favour, by making you feel insecure and aim low.

As Michelle says, "I have been at probably every powerful table that you can think of, I have worked at non-profits, I have been at foundations, I have worked in corporations, served on corporate boards, I have been at G-summits, I have sat in at the UN; they are not that smart."

Repeat to yourself - "They are not that smart. If they can, I can."

Have a great week!