How to Transcend "Feeling Unworthy" in The 21st Century

We can overcome our sense of "worthiness" if we practice accepting our Humanity, while personally cultivating a much deeper sense of purpose.

 I see so many (from the clients I work with to the people I know) talk about how they have some feeling of "unworthiness." The quickest path to transcending your feelings of unworthiness is to accept your humanity and choose to be the "Chain Breaker."

Technology is expanding faster than our brains can process, and so is our ability to make sense of it all.

This means we are losing our meaning-making. Whereas in the past a large part of our time was spent providing and surviving. Now we have an abundance of time, possibilities, and identities, and this can cause unnecessary suffering.

On top of all that we all have our unique core pains, and feeling "unworthy" is one almost everyone can relate to in some way.

We may feel unworthy to be loved, or unworthy of the relationships we have. We may even feel unworthy of the abundance we know (especially when we might watch the rest of the world suffer and starve).

The root of "unworthiness" can usually be traced back to a specific experience as a kid. It can also manifest from the pressure to find meaning in the modern-day world.

Releasing Unworthiness By Accepting Your Humanity

Let me remind you of who you are at your core...

You are a being made of the Infinite Energy of the Cosmos.

If the energy that makes you makes up the entirety of the universe, how can you be unworthy? (because you are one in and of the Sea of the Universe).

This concept is mythopoetic in nature, but also a core Truth our ego likes to forget.

Now you are probably saying "Well I still feel unworthy and feel like I don't have any purpose...And being made of the infinite energy of the universe doesn't give me meaning or purpose..."

Let's first highlight the fact we get to choose our stories and our identities. Egoic identities always evolve, but the energy that makes us does not change.

[Key Summary: Can you accept the fact you are an energetic being having a human experience? If you embodied this perspective, would it alleviate any pressure to find meaning or overcome the feelings of worthiness?]

Learning to accept our humanity and the fact we are imperfectly perfect, is the core problem so many of us face. Living up to our perceived image of perfection is the root of so much of our suffering.

[Key Question: Can you relax and let yourself and life be messy? Can you have compassion for all humanity and the fact we will never get anything perfect?]

Transcending Worthiness for Greater Connection & Influence

Let me share the story of a recent client that illustrates the power of becoming the "Chain Breaker."

Here is the story of "Bob:"

Bob fucking cares and has one of the biggest hearts. He is a father, husband, and disabled military veteran, and now is trying to find his way as a civilian and human being in the twenty-first century.

(As you read this, pretend you are in Bob's Shoes)

First of all, Bob grew up in a chaotic household.

Alcoholism ran deep in the family. His parents kept him alive but never met his emotional needs to provide a deep sense of safety and love. As a kid, he was always looking for a genuine "I love you" and searching for ways he can please his parents to hear those words.

Basically, nothing worked...

This caused him to do whatever he could to hear those words, even if that meant not speaking up for his needs.

Ultimately, he grew up with a lens of life that he was unworthy of love.

[Key Question: Can you relate? Do you have a lens of unworthiness in your life? Can you imagine yourself in Bob's shoes who didn't even feel worthy of love?]

Fast forward to today and Bob is still struggling.

His closet relations get the brunt end of his people-pleasing tendencies (when they only wish for him to be his authentic self and lead the family).

Since his safety net is chaos, when the pressures of life turn up he goes right back into his unconscious patterns. He will then unconsciously find ways to amplify the chaos in his life.

(Remember being in the center of the chaos is "your" safe space as the inner child Bob)

This leads to pretending to create peace by not speaking of his needs, and ultimately this only creates more chaos for Bob.

Imagine not only feeling unsafe, but also this deep sense of "unworthiness of love" (keep in mind Bob DID NOT GET TO CHOOSE his parents or the environment in which he grew up).

On top of all that, let's fast forward to the present moment where Bob no longer has a sense of purpose (remember he is now a veteran looking for a new career).

Unworthiness + Lack of Purpose is one hell of a dark spot.

[Key Question: Have you experienced a dark valley like that? Personally, I did after I lost my father and faced severe depression wondering what, or if anything, makes life worth living...]

Luckily Bob has one of the biggest hearts and is committed to growing and becoming the best version of himself.

This is where Bob has the ability to step out of his story of the past and step into an identity of his choosing.

[Below is the path to Bob's Freedom and Peace]

Introducing the "Chain Breaker."

We have our egoic identities (Father, Entrepreneur, Husband) and our mythopoetic identities. Our mythopoetic identities are the essence of the energy we put out in the world (throughout our entire life).

Another way to say it is that our mythopoetic identity is the role or identity of our Soul or Energetic Essence. (To learn more about this check out the book: The Journey of Soul Initiation by Bill Plotkin)

It is a deeper sense of meaning we can create to help us navigate those moments when we are in between egoic identities. (ie: Veteran to Civilian)

If you are in doubt about who you are as a mythopoetic identity, I invite you to take on the role of "The Chain Breaker."

Characteristics of "The Chain Breaker:"

• Breaks the chain of traumatic bonds passed down through the generations
• Chooses to raise children or treat family members better than the way they were treated as children
• Seeks education and community to help overcome unconscious patterns and heal themselves
• Have the deepest appreciation for the past generations. Even if they did not live up to the expectations of being a perfect "father, mother, grandparent, aunt, uncle, extended family member, etc."
• Breaks cycles of feeling unworthy and encourages everyone they meet to understand their worthiness. (Every human is an energetic being having a human experience).
• Builds healthy boundaries
• -Embodies worthiness because they choose to be "The Chain Breaker" and pave the way for a more whole and unified humanity

Simply put, "The Chain Breaker" asks himself or herself, "how can I do even better than my parent's generations?"

Then they commit to doing "the things..."

Being a "Chain Breaker" is more than worthy. Being a Chainbreaker transcends worthiness because you declare yourself as a leader and role model. The Chain Breaker is more than worthy of any level of abundance or prosperity because this is the path of pursuing your potential for all humanity.

They are the torchbearers paving the way for a better, happier, healthier humanity.

Now when thoughts creep into Bob's head that "he is unworthy" he reminds himself he is The Chain Breaker. Bob also reminds himself that even if he wasn't safe as a kid, now as an adult is more than capable of creating safety and can even practice speaking his needs.

This is Bob 2.0, ready to lead his family and all of humanity by stepping out of the story of "unworthiness."

Summary: A Formula for Letting Go of "Unworthiness"

1. Practice grace for the imperfections of our humanity and 10x this compassion for yourself (as well as your immediate family and ancestors).

2. Reestablish your identity to a mythopoetic identity that is bigger than an egoic role ("parent, father, veteran, etc") that can positively carry you throughout the entirety of your life.

3. Optional but effective (especially in Bob's Case). Take on the identity of becoming "The Chain Breaker." The one who is courageous enough to lead the way for their family, to choose to do things better than past generations, and do their best to raise new humans that no longer suffer from "unworthiness."

[Key Questions to Reflect On:]

- How would your perspective on life and purpose change if you shift your identity to becoming The Chain Breaker?

- How would you go about life embodying this new identity? What would you start doing? What would you stop doing? What thoughts would you no longer entertain about yourself because you knew deep down you are doing enough?

- How would your relationships change with others when you deeply understood your worth to others as a Chain Breaker?

- What would you create (from a space of worthiness and love) when you let go of your unconscious patterns to prove or feel worthiness, and instead can be courageous enough to chase your deepest dreams?

I know that by you being somewhere in space and time, reading this, this is part of your purpose. I want to remind you that you have the ability to be the Chain Breaker, but it will take some courage.

Are you ready to take your first step?

I want to personally acknowledge, appreciate, and honor you for doing so.

You Are Doing The Greatest Work For All Of Humanity.

Transcend Worthiness And Step Into Your Beingness As The Chain Breaker.

THANK YOU <3

From me personally, and all future generations/descendants you will positively affect.