How to Use your Feminine Energy to Boost your Career

Have you ever heard of the concept of masculine and feminine energies? Did you know that we ALL have a mix of masculine and feminine traits and energy? And by “all,” I mean every single one of us. These energies affect every aspect of our lives, and that includes our experiences in the workplace.

If this is all new to you, don’t worry – you’re not alone. The discussion surrounding feminine and masculine energies, especially in the workplace, has historically been limited. Societal conditioning has led to a bias towards masculine energy, while feminine energy has been sidelined or even stigmatized as being weak or inferior. 

Despite these challenges, the interplay between feminine and masculine energies has become a topic of increasing significance in our modern workplace. As our understanding of organizational dynamics evolves, there's a growing recognition of the importance of feminine qualities like empathy, collaboration, receptivity, and creativity.

In this article, we will delve deeper into the importance of feminine energy in the workplace, and we will reflect on the special role women can play in shifting workplace dynamics towards greater collaboration, more humanized professional relationships, and an overall healthier, more supportive (and thus more performant) organizational culture.

Masculine and Feminine Energies

Masculine and feminine energies are abstract concepts often used in spiritual, psychological, and cultural contexts to describe certain qualities or characteristics traditionally associated with masculinity and femininity, respectively. It's important to note that these energies are not tied to biological sex or gender identity but rather represent archetypal aspects of human experience.

Masculine energy is about “doing” and living from the head: action orientation, logic, strength, responsibility, control, problem-solving, assertiveness, and competition. Feminine energy is about “being” and living from the heart: intuition, nurturing, softness, creativity, empathy, vulnerability, cooperation, letting go, and receptivity.

We all have a primary mode (feminine/masculine) that is most natural to our core. Remember that this mode isn’t tied to your biological sex or gender identity; a man might have a natural tendency towards masculine energy, or a natural tendency towards feminine energy. Likewise, some women have a natural feminine tendency, and some have a natural masculine tendency. 

Our masculine and feminine energies are supposed to complement each other within us. We’re at our best when we lead with our natural core mode and have a healthy integration of the other. When feminine and masculine energies are balanced, we experience a greater sense of harmony and fulfillment, better health, less stress, and deeper relationships. 

When feminine and masculine energies are askew, we feel more friction, internal and external conflicts, unhealthy relationships, and stress in everyday life. This is often what happens to high-achieving women who are overcompensating and operating in a more masculine mode, even though their natural core is feminine. 

Why Most Workplaces Lack Feminine Energy

Now that you know more about feminine and masculine energies, you will probably agree that most workplaces are dominated by masculine energy. You may wonder why this is still so strongly the case, even though women’s representation in the workplace is on an upward trend. 

One of the main reasons is that traditional gender roles have historically defined the workplace as a domain primarily for men, thus emphasizing qualities such as competitiveness, assertiveness, and rationality. As a result, feminine traits such as empathy, cooperation, and intuition have been undervalued or overlooked in many organizational settings. Both men and women who have strong feminine energy often find that this system continues to prioritize masculine traits and devalue feminine qualities. 

Another factor that contributes to the marginalization of feminine energy in the workplace is the underrepresentation of women in leadership positions and decision-making roles. It’s interesting to note that even when women reach leadership positions, they may not embody their full feminine essence. The reason is that if companies and society don’t value feminine energy, we won’t have leaders who operate in the feminine mode. If high-achieving women with more feminine energy know they are being evaluated by the standards of masculine energy, they will stay in their masculine energy. This comes at the cost of creativity, compassionate leadership, and collaboration in the workplace.

Another reason that explains the lack of feminine energy in the workplace is that people lean toward masculine traits when they are stressed or feel in “survival mode”. It makes sense that when you feel threatened, pressured, or overwhelmed, your primary reaction is control, problem-solving, action, and logic. You cannot be intuitive, creative, receptive, or cooperative in those moments. Unfortunately, a huge part of the workforce is living in chronic stress – especially women, and even more so women leaders. 

And guess what… if your natural state is feminine energy, and you have to operate in the masculine you will burn out (and you won’t get very far up the ladder). 

As a result, many high-achieving women are stuck in this negative loop where operating in their masculine energy leads them to burnout, and burnout leads them to operate in their masculine energy (if you think you’re stuck in that loop, make sure to check out my Survival Guide to Survival Mode!).

The Consequences for Women and the Unique Role They Can Play in Shifting the Trend

A lack of feminine energy leads to worse outcomes. Not only can a lack of feminine energy lead to burnout (especially for women), but it also leads to worse business answers. Analytical thinking plays a role in decision-making, but so do intuition, emotional intelligence, and collaboration. When only one way of making a decision is valid, it is easy to label people with more feminine ways of thinking as “irrational”, and a lot of the wisdom and talent those people possess aren’t implemented to reach better solutions. 

It seems quite clear that when the workplace doesn’t make space for feminine energy, organizations lose. But is that true on an individual level, too? Are women who display more masculine traits more successful in the workplace?

Previous research shows that women displaying strong masculine traits in the workplace (e.g., strong assertiveness, confidence, and even aggressiveness) are actually suffering from a backlash effect in which they are sanctioned for violating the feminine gender role stereotype (Backlash effects for disconfirming gender stereotypes in organizations, Laurie A. Rudman, Julie E. Phelan, 2008).

A follow-up study examined the impact of self-monitoring on the promotion rates of MBA men and women over 8 years following graduation (Reducing the backlash effect: Self-monitoring and women’s promotions, Olivia A. O’NeillCharles A. O’Reilly, 2011). Results show that women who were more masculine, but who also self-monitored their masculine traits and strongly utilized their feminine traits, received more promotions. This suggests that self-monitoring is associated with an absence of backlash effects. Masculine women who also lean in their feminine energy received 1.5 times more promotions than masculine men, and about 2 times as many promotions as feminine men, regardless of whether the men were high or low self-monitors. They also received 3 times as many promotions as masculine women who were low self-monitors, affirming that masculine behavior alone does not garner success.

The fascinating insight here is that being able to regulate one’s masculine behavior and lean into feminine traits does not simply put women on par with men, it gives them even more of an advantage! 

If you want more examples of psychological research showing how balancing feminine and masculine energies improves businesses, check out Women leaders make work better. Here’s the science behind how to promote them (American Psychological Association, 2023)

5 Ways to Reconnect to Your Feminine Energy as a Woman

Reconnecting to your feminine energy is critical for your physical, mental, and emotional health. It’s also one of the most underrated superpowers to improve your career, your relationships, and your overall sense of fulfillment. So what can you do to reignite and nurture your feminine energy?

1. Spend time with women - Recharge by spending time with women you love. This is an easy one to pair with others - go dancing, eat an incredible meal, take an art class together, organize a spa day, or have a long talk about what’s been going on and how you feel (just share your feelings, do NOT problem-solve!)
2. Slow down - Engage in gentle and nurturing forms of movement such as tai chi, qigong, or yoga. Spend time in nature to ground yourself and connect with the natural rhythms of the earth. Go for walks, hike in the mountains, or simply sit in a park and observe the beauty around you.
3. Listen to your intuition - Practice tuning into your intuition and inner wisdom through mindfulness, meditation, or journaling. Trust your instincts and your inner guidance to lead you towards what feels right for you. Lean into what feels easy and comfortable in your body e.g., when you consider options, take time to “feel” them in your body. Are you relaxed and comfortable, or are you tensed and constricted? Your body never lies, unlike your mind!  
4. Feed your senses - Feed yourself a delicious and nurturing meal, listen to moving music, go to an art exhibit, or even just set out some fresh flowers. Make it a habit to connect with what moves you and makes you FEEL ALIVE. Get out of your head and back into your body.
5. Have fun and be playful - Be spontaneous and receptive, go with the flow, and let yourself be surprised for once! Explore new hobbies to spark curiosity and excitement. Express your feelings and moods through creative activities, e.g., dance, painting, gardening, cooking, journaling, fashion, and more. Allow yourself to just have FUN, whatever fun means to you - no chores, no control, no judgment!

The amount of time you spend in your feminine energy is unique to you as an individual. The minimum would be 50%, meaning that your time is balanced between using masculine and feminine energies. However, some women might need to spend much more time in their feminine energy to feel balanced and healthy. Keep in mind that if your work requires a lot of masculine energy, you will need to spend most of your free time in your feminine energy to reach that 50% balance… Are you anywhere close to doing that at the moment?

5 Ways to Bring Your Feminine Energy Into the Workplace

Another way to get your percentage up is to bring more of your feminine energy into the workplace. 

Companies have a role to play in creating workplaces where feminine energy is welcome. That being said, each of us, especially women, can play a role every day to embody more feminine traits and transform the workplace from within. This includes:

1. Expressing gratitude as often as possible Say thank you often, and mean it! Thank people in e-mails or messages, and in face-to-face conversations. Send handwritten notes to special colleagues and clients for their support, guidance, and contributions. Publicly acknowledge your team members during meetings or presentations. Have a gratitude moment in every weekly team meeting, where everyone shares one thing they are grateful for. Incorporate your own gratitude ritual into your workday (e.g., write down 3 things you’re grateful for at the end of each day and leave them on a Post-it on your screen - read them first thing the next morning). Encourage your colleagues and team members to express gratitude and show appreciation for one another’s contributions.
2. Being compassionate with yourself and others, and being collaborative Slow down enough to show your people that you care. Ask about their weekend. When they’re talking about a challenge, exercise that empathy muscle and consider how you’d feel in their shoes. Encourage colleagues to share their thoughts, concerns, and ideas freely. Create a safe space for open dialogue where everyone feels valued and heard, not judged and dismissed. Empower colleagues by recognizing and celebrating their diverse perspectives, skills, and contributions (use positive feedback!). Approach conflicts with compassion and a willingness to find mutually beneficial solutions, acting as a mediator when necessary. Remain flexible and adaptable in the face of challenges or changes in the workplace. Be resilient and embrace change with patience and compassion, for yourself and others!
3. Daring to be authentic and to show vulnerability Share personal stories or experiences and be open about challenges, failures, or moments of self-doubt. Acknowledge mistakes and take responsibility for them. Recognize your limitations and reach out to colleagues for assistance and guidance (e.g., seek mentorship and coaching). Express your positive and negative emotions professionally and constructively. Be honest about your boundaries and set limits. Embrace imperfection and let go of the need to appear perfect all the time. Accept mistakes, flaws, and limitations as part of being human - be more compassionate to yourself and others! 
4. Creating time and space for creativity and innovation Encourage yourself and others to think beyond conventional solutions and current ways of working e.g., if you’re used to structured presentations, try a paperless meeting where you focus more on people and going with the flow. Have daily sources of inspiration, whether it’s art, nature, or conversations with friends or colleagues from another industry/background. Try new ways to problem-solve (e.g., mind mapping, design thinking). Engage with colleagues from different backgrounds, disciplines, or expertise, and be open to new perspectives and new ways of solving old problems. Take calculated risks and step outside of your comfort zone (e.g., present bold ideas to your boss or clients). If anything goes wrong, don’t be discouraged by setbacks, but take them as a valuable lesson to inform future innovation!
5. Tapping into your intuition and trusting it! Pay attention to your inner voice and the subtle cues and signals your body and mind are giving you. Sometimes, intuition speaks to us through feelings, sensations, or even dreams. Take the time to listen and tune into your inner wisdom. Embrace creativity and tap into your imagination and intuition to come up with fresh ideas, solutions, and approaches to old problems or challenges. Read people and situations by paying attention to non-verbal cues, body language, and energy to gain insights into others' thoughts, feelings, and intentions. Last but not least, cultivate mindfulness and presence in your workday to quiet the mind and create space for intuition to emerge…

Looking at the above, it’s clear that integrating more feminine energy into the workplace can lead to numerous benefits for individuals, teams, and organizations. This includes a greater sense of collaboration, connection with colleagues on a deeper level, more humanized professional relationships, the development of authentic and inspirational leaders, an increase in creativity and innovation, and overall a more positive organizational culture characterized by trust, empathy, and support.

Conclusion

If you lean very masculine, I encourage you to slow down and proactively lean feminine, at least in your free time. See what beauty surfaces for you, and watch the impact on your stress level. Consider slowing down. BE instead of DO. Show compassion for yourself and others. Leave space for creativity, ideas, and projects to unfold in their own time. Trust your intuition and bodily sensations. Have fun and be playful. Be open and receptive, knowing that you can attract success in addition to chasing it. When you’re ready, bring those changes to work and watch the magic happen!

With the steady adaptation of these ideas, we all will be able to express feminine energies in the workplace in a more welcoming way. This will lead to more harmonious, creative, balanced, and healthy work environments where everyone feels completely comfortable being who they truly are. And when we are true to ourselves, we are the best for our families, for our colleagues and clients, and for ourselves.

If this article brought up some insights that felt big or uncomfortable, or if you struggle to understand your situation, you can download the free “Superwomen Survival Guide to Survival mode” or get in touch HERE

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Célia Zermatten is an Empowerment and Career Coach for High-Potential Women, as well as an experienced Consultant working with companies on innovative approaches for female top-talent attraction, retention, and development | Ex-Manager at McKinsey & Company | ICF ACC

Visit www.celiazermatten.com for more resources