"‘if I don’t know, I’ll just figure it out…’" Matt Quist

1. What inspired you to transition from military to civilian life, and how did you prepare for this significant change?

My first OC asked me what my plans were within CAF, and at the time I thought I would do 25 years plus. She told me (wisely) that I might feel that way right now, but to be open to re-evaluating that feeling since I might later find CAF wasn’t still right for me at a future date.

During the year I was gone to Afghanistan, I wasn’t liking how much I was away from my wife and our 4 kids, and that I was still young enough with enough possibilities to make a good go of it in civilian life. We started talking about how to make it happen, but I knew for sure when a senior officer I respected asked me why I was leaving. I laid out the plan: AOC, then Ops O, then promoted. Blackberry/iPhone, 14-hour days, more school, more moves, etc. I told him this was when I take my chips off the table and leave the casino. He left shortly after

2. Could you describe your current role in civilian life and how you arrived at this path?

I was a Logistics officer specialized in supply, so that transitioned well into my current role in supply chain in a midstream pipeline company. It is somewhat like DND/CAF in that it has a fair amount of structure and bureaucracy as a regulated business. It is a very engineering-heavy business, and I learn something new every day, which is awesome. 

I’m responsible for developing and building warehouse infrastructure across North America, along with some strategy work and a software project related to SAP.

3. During your transition, what obstacles did you encounter, and what strategies proved instrumental in overcoming them?

I found I really missed the structure of the military. Routine was comfort to me, and when it was gone I found it difficult to re-establish. I missed the rhythm of the life. After several years, I’m putting in some intentional effort to rebuild that piece in my life.

I found I had become passive about my plans, that I subconsciously expected someone else to manage my career for me, and this needed a rethink. I had to write myself a set of orders, basically, and sign them myself because now I was in charge.

I really bought in to the military ethos and identity. When I left, letting that go was difficult. I think after I broke my back on a P Res training exercise, the process of being medically released really drove home that the dream was over.

No one told me there would be that amount of grief, but some things you find out for yourself, I guess. My advice would be to expect some sense of loss and even sharp grief, and at least that way forewarned is forearmed. When it happens, don’t be shy about finding help and using it, whether it’s a friend, a counselor, or family. Good help is so valuable, but it has to be asked for. There is zero weakness in asking for help.

4. In what ways have your military skills and experiences been an asset in your civilian career?

Training on the planning process has been a huge plus in seeing around corners in civilian life. The ability to reason things through, make some judgements and deductions, and think from first principles is a huge plus from my time in uniform.

The other piece is kind of like a bold ‘if I don’t know, I’ll just figure it out…’, which comes from having had to solve lots of challenges that presented themselves in military life.

I found during transition that lots of the people I was doing the SCAN stuff with had a hard time talking up their abilities and accomplishments. It is a team thing and it gets pounded into you not to take credit for team achievement. That works in uniform, but not in civilian life. Being able to take honest credit for things you are actually good at and actually did is part of adjusting to civilian life again.

5. Are there any resources, networks, or strategies you found invaluable during your transition that you’d recommend to others?

I would recommend:

·        Consciously setting out a vision for your life as a civilian. It’s okay to have fun, not have a short haircut, be chill, say what you like, put up a political sign, and all sorts of other things you couldn’t do in uniform. You served, now make it a mission to figure out how to enjoy the kind of life you put on the uniform to defend.

·        Read some books, find some people that talk about the challenges. I enjoyed Herb Thompson (US), David Neal (Australia), and some others on LinkedIn for this.

·        Keep a sense of routine. I didn’t do this and it made it much harder than it needed to be.

·        Meaning is important, but ask yourself why you need that meaning. If you are drawn to go back into the Reserve, ask yourself why and sit with the emotions. For me, I did it because I really had no idea how to find meaning in civilian life, not because I necessarily loved the Reserves.

·        Don’t expect civilian life or work to be anything like the military. Literally no one will understand or care what you did, how many troops you commanded, what you blew up, how many push ups you can do, or that you did AOC, JCSP, or whatever else. They don’t understand and can’t be expected to. It’s on you to take those skills and do the work to translate them into things that your new civilian colleagues care about and respect. Unlearning the sense of authority and status is a key piece of transition. A lot of the time it looks like the line from that rap song: ‘sit down, be humble.’

·        There are some fantastic people in civilian life.

·        If you need a therapist, find one. Huge help.

6. Reflecting on your transition, what piece of knowledge or advice do you wish had been shared with you beforehand?

I wish that someone had told me it will be hard, and to have compassion on myself and my family while we figured the transition out. It takes a while, there are lots of emotions, and family dynamics can take some time to adjust. 

Nothing will feel quite as purposeful as a deployment, but that is deceptive. Being a free civilian in a free country is a noble thing itself. Accepting that reality takes a while.

7.How did you navigate the shift in identity from being in the military to reintegrating into civilian life, and what helped you through this process?

I navigated this very slowly. I still look back fondly on my time in the military.

What probably helped most was being forced into leaving, to be honest. When I knew it was dead and done, I found it easier to reintegrate into civilian life.

8.What aspects of military life do you find yourself missing the most, and how do you keep those memories alive?

I miss the people, the teamwork, and the joking around. It was a ton of fun.

I keep some pictures around, I did up a shadow box, and I keep my beret on my desk. Every day I remember something from my time in CAF.