idea of success- why you should focus on becoming a better human

The common idea of success- why you should focus on becoming a better human

 Right from our birth, we are chasing success.

We work hard for each of our exams, give up all our hobbies and play for success in our early teens.

 The common idea of success-

But what is this success that we are chasing?

 In modern terms, some well-paying jobs. Or in the ultra-modern terms, owning their own successful start-up. Because unless people inherit their family business, the so-called “educated” students are now all in for the start-up culture inspired by the westerners.

 And what marks this success? How much is one earning?

And? The kind of high-end lifestyle they can lead.  

Basically, wealth.

 But, is this materialistic success really giving us true happiness?

The IT sector is one of the most well-paying sectors of India. But according to a survey of US-based start-up Tiny Pulse, only 19% of employees are truly happy in their work while only 36% are satisfied with the growth prospect in the work.

A success without satisfaction- is this really an aim to pursue all our lives?

And if happiness is our ultimate motto, how can we reach a bit closer to it?

 Attainment of happiness- from different ideologies

• There is the wildly popular Japanese concept “IKIGAI”- this says that we can only experience true fulfilment in life when we love our work, we are good at it and the work is well-needed as well as well-paid.
• Positive psychologists say happiness comes from pleasure, engagement, and meaning. Here the pleasure is the lifestyle and leisurely activities that we enjoy and engagement is associated with our professional life. Meaning is associated with serving others.
• From the ancient Indian perspective, happiness comes from these 4 sources- Dharma (morality), Artha (wealth), Kama (pleasure), and Moksha (liberation from the cycle of life).

 And now, we are focusing mostly on pleasure for our happiness. Surely these are making us happy. But, only temporarily, and to some extent.

 But for lasting happiness, we need to find gratification from our works also.

An average working adult spends a major part of their weekdays in their career. So if they are stuck in a career with not much value, fulfilment, and scope of growth- they might not like it in the wrong run. Even if the work offers a handsome paycheck and a tagline of being "successful".

The IKIGAI method is now wildly popular to determine which career stream will bring forth the most earning, respect, and as well as utilising a person's abilities and interests.

 But, can work alone bring you the feeling of success in life?

 Of course not. The aspects like servicing, relationship, self-care, etc also play vital roles. You cannot be truly successful if you hate your body or have a toxic relationship to get back to.

 In a way, success is the extension of happiness.

 And not everyone is lucky enough to have the job of their dreams. They too can get happy with the "Meaning" or "Dharma" part of attaining happiness.

 What is it?

It is a way of living where you serve humanity or the divine as a whole. Where you go beyond your small boundary.

 You can volunteer in an NGO, visit the church regularly or even teach your neighbourhood kids.

When you work for others with no expectations, you have a sense of joy and satisfaction.

 And working for free might not sound like success, but success is always about quality- not quantity. So quantifying your success and measuring your wealth will never give you the "feeling" you are striving for.

Shifts need to be made-

But somehow, this broader sense of success and happiness contradicts our "modern" lifestyle.

 Here are a few tips to shift your perspective-

• Focus on becoming a better human being. We are trained to strive for wealth only, but the traits like values, honesty,and humility go a long way to bring you peace in mind.
• True success is when all the aspects of life are equally balanced. Aim for that.
• Get out of the competition, at least mentally. Focus on yourself rather than others. It is hard to be no. 1 with 8 billion competitors worldwide. So don't let your success depend on others' opinions or achievements.
• Find out your core values. If you want to spend time with your family and go on frequent vacations, hustling 24/7 will never get you the success you actually want.
• Everyone has their own definition of success. Figure out what is yours, and plan your goals around it.
• You might lose certain opportunities for growth when you trust your core values. But it will very well be worth it.
• When they say, failures are the way to success, believe them. You cannot get straight As in life all your life. There will be setbacks. You have to learn from them and come back stronger.

 In the end, success is indeed a state of mind.

You need to look at the right things with the right mindset and extend your hands in the right direction to be fulfilled in life.

 What do you want your life to look like after 10-15 years?

Prabha Rajan - career Counselor at Elysian Inspires - A Unique Career Counselling centre for all ages