The Illusion of Authenticity Series: Deconstructing Narratives Pt. 2

The fifty trillion dollar question—why do we seek such insecure notions as psychological certainty when writing these narratives?

Let’s break it down:

The search for an "absolute" sense of identity superiority often arises from a need for stability in an inherently unpredictable world.

Seems plain and simple—Right?

Yet this notion inherently leads us to avoid this innate complexity, especially in regard to default neural programming—pushing our will or desires to survive, evolve—adaptive qualities and states.

This drive for certainty offers psychological anchoring, providing a false sense of control over one's self-concept and social role. Yet, beneath this pursuit lies a profound vulnerability: a fear of ambiguity, rejection, or existential insignificance.

The rigid constructs of identity we create in response to this fear often serve as shields—deflective mechanisms to ward off the discomfort of uncertainty or the chaos of conflicting self-perceptions.

The Role of Validity in Rigid Constructs

Rigid identity constructs function as self-validating systems. When individuals assign superior validity to these constructs, they often do so by cherry-picking experiences and beliefs through biased heuristics and fallacious reasoning that reinforce their desired narrative. This process leverages cognitive biases like confirmation bias and selective attention, creating an illusion of coherence and authenticity.

However, this rigidity is maladaptive in its deflection of introspection and growth. By elevating one’s identity as superior or "absolute," individuals sidestep the discomfort of reconciling contradictory traits or values, often at the expense of relational depth and adaptability. Such avoidance reinforces a sense of separateness, perpetuating defensive postures rather than fostering connection.

Healthy Mimesis: A Pathway to Connection

In contrast, healthy mimesis—grounded in adaptive mirroring rather than blind replication—enables the building of meaningful human-to-human connections. Unlike the rigidity of superiority constructs, which isolate and alienate, healthy mimesis acknowledges the fluidity of identity. It allows individuals to mirror others’ emotional states, values, and actions in ways that foster empathy, trust, and mutual understanding.

What the hell is Mimesis?

Not to be confused with that popular brunch drink:

Resisting Defensiveness: Healthy mimesis avoids the deflective or avoidant tendencies of maladaptive certainty. Instead, it embraces relational fluidity, encouraging openness to feedback and the nuanced dynamics of interpersonal exchanges.

Promoting Empathy: This form of mimesis amplifies emotional intelligence by helping individuals understand and validate others' experiences, bridging gaps in perspective while fostering collective growth.

Healthy Mimesis in Identity Construction:

In the context of narrative identity, healthy mimesis recognizes that while external influences shape us, they need not rigidify our self-concept. Instead, this adaptive mirroring allows for the incorporation of diverse experiences and viewpoints into a fluid, evolving identity. Unlike the unexamined replication seen in unhealthy mimesis, this approach reinforces conscious awareness and relational adaptability —broader perspectives, healthier, adaptable identity associations and outcomes.

For example: an individual might reflect the compassion or vulnerability shown by a close friend, not as a mimicry of that trait but as an invitation to deepen their understanding of themselves in relational contexts. This dynamic fosters a more authentic, interconnected self-concept, resisting the isolating tendencies of rigid identity superiority.

Through this lens, mimesis becomes a dynamic bridge. It helps individuals attune to one another’s needs and perspectives, nurturing the sense of belonging that rigid constructs attempt to simulate but cannot truly deliver. Healthy mimesis resists the binary of “superior versus inferior” by embracing shared humanity, encouraging individuals to see themselves as part of an interconnected network rather than as isolated or elevated entities.

Maladaptive Certainty vs. Relational Fluidity

Maladaptive certainty—marked by an unyielding belief in the superiority or absoluteness of one’s identity—stands in stark contrast to the relational fluidity promoted by healthy mimesis. The former seeks validation through dominance and rejection of alternative views, while the latter seeks understanding through openness and integration.

Where rigid constructs alienate, healthy mimesis creates "vihensiin" (a deeper state of relational bonding, mutual recognition, and shared growth). This relational dynamic arises from a willingness to engage with the uncertainty and complexity of both self and other, recognizing that identity is not a static endpoint but an ongoing, co-creative process.

Vihensiin refers to the deep relational attunement and mutual resonance achieved through shared understanding, empathy, and adaptive connection, fostering a profound sense of human-to-human belonging.

It transcends mere social mirroring by embracing the fluid interplay of self and other, enabling individuals to co-create meaningful, authentic relationships that honor individuality while cultivating collective growth.

Vihensiin aligns with unitive theory and post-conventional ego development by fostering relational dynamics that transcend societal conformity and individualistic validation, emphasizing mutual growth, empathy, and authenticity.

This stage of ego development encourages individuals to engage with others from a place of integrated self-awareness, enabling co-creative connections that honor both personal evolution and collective interdependence.

The Evolutionary Value of Relational Identity

By fostering relational fluidity, healthy mimesis aligns with our evolutionary drive for social cohesion. It moves beyond the individualistic pursuit of identity superiority to embrace collective identity dynamics, which prioritize shared growth over individual validation. This shift not only strengthens personal adaptability but also deepens interpersonal connections, laying the groundwork for more resilient and empathetic communities.

In sum, the quest for identity superiority often emerges as a subversive defensive response to existential uncertainty.

Yet, it is through healthy mimesis—rooted in empathy, connection, and shared humanity—that individuals can transcend this maladaptive need for certainty, cultivating a more adaptive and relationally enriched sense of fluid self-construction and narrative.

Would you like further elaboration on the interplay between these dynamics or how they manifest in specific social contexts?